Black Poetry : Daddy

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by soulful2006, Aug 20, 2005.

  1. soulful2006

    soulful2006 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    It was raining the day she waited
    For her Daddy to come
    Her eyes so full of hope lit up like jewels
    He was caught in a web of unfulfilled promises
    That he had once made to his daughter

    The smile on her face or that sexy lady's warm
    Night time embrace
    He could never make up his mind
    His love for his daughter now straddled on a fence


    This poem was written by me earlier in the school day for an in class exercise that dealt with the power of words and there uses. The words were Rain,Jewels,Web,and Fence.
    I welcome anyone else who would like to take the same four words and come up with their own poem sketch using them. :thinking: :thinking:
     
  2. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    She was divine in beauty
    every rain drop lit a spark
    her eyes was like jewels
    gleammin he could only
    smile upon her heart

    Trying not to get caught up
    in the weave web of notion
    but display the depth of
    sweet emotion she spool
    into the lands beyond da
    white picket fence only he
    knowz .

    nice flow and mixture sista i like this thankz for sharing .
     
  3. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I really liked your usage of those four words given, beautiful and creative soulful and Rich. I look forward to reading the other entries.
     
  4. soulful2006

    soulful2006 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Thank you both for the comments and input. I too can't wait to see how others use the words.
     
  5. Lloyd

    Lloyd Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    What's a daddy?I wonder
    I didn't have one and i don't think i'll do
    Now i'm a big boy with jewels
    I fancy about what i could've done with him
    My God there is rain outside
    I can't get out with a weather like that
    I take place and i get web connected
    i look inside my bedroom...there's no one
    I look out of the fence through the window...no one
    So slowly but surely
    My eyes are pouring
    Daddy,what a strange word
    It doesn't mean a think for me
    Though it makes me shed tears

    I've used the 4 words.
    Itz hard for me to write such a piece,but...i should make do with,that's how life goes
     
  6. Poetrymama

    Poetrymama Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Very nice poem.
     
  7. Defiantson

    Defiantson Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Rain,Jewels,Web,and Fence

    Another day has passed
    and the rain outside my window
    is puring down the street.
    And the lady in my bed
    said "Come back to bed"
    I felt bad though
    Cause that jewel she wore
    on her ring finger
    Meant that she was married
    But was it my fault
    that she slept with me
    And now I am caught up
    In a web of frence
    I felt bad, but she should have
    known better.
    And as she left
    her dress tore on my fence
    and I wondered
    how is she gonna explain
    where and why she was not at home
    and how and when did her dress rip.
    Again I was caught up
    and didn't think
    until the rain hit
    and my eyes focused on her Jewlery
    and now the web of this
    was caught up by my fence
    causing me to re-evaluate
    my sexual indeverous.

    Nice poem, Hope you all like mine.
     
  8. soulful2006

    soulful2006 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I like yours very much this was nice as well were the others that used the four words. I guess this was an exercise that increased all of our skils in some way or another.
     
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