The Front Porch : Curiosity of a 3 year old

[newrami75]

Hi,
Apologies in advance - English is not my 1st language, and also we're still studying the culture.
I'm a Caucasian Jew, and would be grateful to anyone willing to take the time and share their opinion regarding kid's education. I hope it's not complicating things unnecessarily, I just want to do the right thing...
One of daughters, aged 3+, became curious about skin shades. For her there's no baggage, she never heard of racist stupidity (and if you told her she'd think you've lost your mind). She just has a sense of wonder about human versatility - people surviving in desert & snow. Her interest was triggered when she played with an African-American friend at the kindergarden yard, my daughter got sunburns while her friend didn't.

The only problem is... knowing my kid, she might put her friend in the spotlight, drown her with questions about this "superpower" of withstanding sunburns, point it out to others "look, how cool is that". This friend is only 3, she could feel complimented but she might also feel "in the spotlight". It's not like asking an adult teacher who's inviting you to ask.

So I'm not sure what to teache her...
- let her interrogate the friend, and hope this 3-year-old can tell whether she enjoys the attention or not?
- Or tell my daughter that "black is beautiful, but not everyone enjoys discussing it"? weird message, isn't it?
I tried to make some analogy to being Jewish - my kids enjoy discussing their heritage, but it could change if/when they feel discrimination.

Sincere thanks to anyone who took the trouble to read

 

[Destee]

newrami75 ... Welcome Welcome Welcome ...

Thanks for joining us and sharing!

You seem overwhelmed with the thought of race, racism, all of that, putting it on your child.

But have no fear, children are so innocent, often their questions are too.

Approach it from that aspect, from where she is, at 3 years old.

Tell her the truth, that people are different, not everyone is the same.

Some people are tall, some short, some have brown hair, some have black, some have blonde.

We're all different, with each one being special in their own way. That's what i'd tell the baby.

If you don't mind sharing, what is your first language, what part of the world do you reside in?

Wishing you well ... hope the above helps ... and thanks for joining us!

Much Love and Peace.



Destee

 

[newrami75]

Hi,
Thanks for taking the trouble to reply!
I don't see myself as obsessed about races -Jews had had enough of it. I'm obsessed about fitting in and avoiding social mistakes... we came from Israel (actually visiting the old homeland, if you note the time difference). It's hard to adjust, it would probably be years before we're considered "polished", and I'm horrified at the thought of receiving a reprimanding call from the teacher (or from other parents). Actually noting the American culture, I'm even more horrified at the thought of not getting any calls, and just being avoided.

Are you saying that won't bother anyone, if my kid asks her friend questions like "how long can you stay in the sun" (in the "bestest" intention of course, even in envy)?

Even my post here seems to be considered a social mistake but I'm really at my wits end.

 

[dunwiddat]

Hi,
Thanks for taking the trouble to reply!
I don't see myself as obsessed about races -Jews had had enough of it. I'm obsessed about fitting in and avoiding social mistakes... we came from Israel (actually visiting the old homeland, if you note the time difference). It's hard to adjust, it would probably be years before we're considered "polished", and I'm horrified at the thought of receiving a reprimanding call from the teacher (or from other parents). Actually noting the American culture, I'm even more horrified at the thought of not getting any calls, and just being avoided.

Are you saying that won't bother anyone, if my kid asks her friend questions like "how long can you stay in the sun" (in the "bestest" intention of course, even in envy)?

Even my post here seems to be considered a social mistake but I'm really at my wits end.

Your written English is very good considering that this language is not your first language