Black Jokes Humor : CREATION EXPLAINED AND CLARIFIED

Discussion in 'Black Jokes Humor' started by dstny, Aug 10, 2007.

  1. dstny

    dstny Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    May 27, 2004
    Messages:
    378
    Likes Received:
    6
    Ratings:
    +6
    In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

    Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and
    Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said,
    "You want chocolate with that?"

    And Man said, "Yes!"
    and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles."
    And they gained 10 pounds.
    And Satan smiled.

    And God created the healthful yogurt
    that Woman might keep the figure
    that Man found so fair.
    And Satan brought forth white flour
    from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them.
    And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.

    So God said, "Try my fresh green salad."
    And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing,
    buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side.
    And Man and Woman unfastened their
    belts following the repast.

    God then said, "I have sent you
    heart healthy vegetables,
    and olive oil in which to cook them."
    And Satan brought forth deep fried fish
    and chicken-fried steak so big
    it needed its own platter.
    And Man gained more weight and
    his cholesterol went through the roof.

    God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake,"
    and said, "It is good."
    Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."

    God then brought forth running shoes
    so that His children might lose
    those extra pounds.
    And Satan gave cable TV with
    a remote control so Man would not
    have to toil changing the channels.
    And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light
    and gained pounds.

    Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and
    brimming with nutrition.
    And Satan peeled off the healthful skin
    and sliced the starchy center
    into chips and deep-fried them.
    And Man gained pounds.

    God then gave lean beef so that Man
    might consume fewer calories
    and still satisfy his appetite.
    And Satan created McDonald's
    and its 99-cent double cheeseburger.
    Then said, "You want fries with that?"
    And Man replied, "Yes!
    And super size them!"
    And Satan said, "It is good."
    And Man went into cardiac arrest.

    God sighed and created
    quadruple bypass surgery.

    Then Satan created HMOs.
     
  2. Goddess Auset333

    Goddess Auset333 Banned MEMBER

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2007
    Messages:
    1,841
    Likes Received:
    22
    Ratings:
    +23
    Beloved dstny;

    This just inspired me to write something similar to this.

    Thanks for sharing
    :SuN036: :SuN036: :SuN036:
     
Loading...
Similar Threads - CREATION EXPLAINED CLARIFIED
  1. Al D
    Replies:
    1
    Views:
    159
  2. Clyde C Coger Jr
    Replies:
    47
    Views:
    1,562
  3. Liberty
    Replies:
    8
    Views:
    257
  4. AACOOLDRE
    Replies:
    5
    Views:
    397
  5. AACOOLDRE
    Replies:
    0
    Views:
    312