Black Spirituality Religion : Conscious of Self: Seeing the past, understanding the present.

Discussion in 'Black Spirituality / Religion - General Discussion' started by Metaverse, Nov 8, 2007.

  1. Metaverse

    Metaverse Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    One night at a Poetry club I lingered around to speak to a Brotha poet deep into metaphysics like myself. He called himself “Infinite.” Bro. Infinite had a very strange way of looking at the world. Anyone with such a gift can help to break the web of insanity around us. He looked like your average Black Man in Hip-Hop gear, lusting to touch the mic and spit something the crowd would love to hear. But his lesson tonight was about infidelity, and so-called conscious people.

    He told me a story that made me question what we call being “conscious.”

    “Conscious of what?” Bro. Infinite said. “This Cat says he’s conscious, or more conscious than this Cat, this Cat is a Muslim, or a Five percenter, or whatever- so he claims to be conscious…conscious of what? Cause you can’t be conscious of everything, we’d go insane if we were conscious of everything. The only consciousness that matters is being conscious of self. That’s it. All these Cats who come on stage talking about this and that, European history, African history, Eskimo history- and then they call themselves conscious because they have a library card- naw, that’s not being conscious- that’s being well read. Consciousness is scary for most Blacks. All these Cats into so-called Neo-Soul with the dreads and incense, they don’t have a clue what being conscious is.”

    Bro. Infinite was high. But that’s just the nature of this particular environment. The smoke came through the air ducts. But it made his truth come out, the way he needed it too. OK what is your consciousness? I asked him.

    “For me really, now this is going to trip you out. I’m serious. For me being conscious means you are aware of where you have been and who you have been at all times. Look, I grew up in a very spiritual family. My gran’mother was a super psychic Woman, I mean this Woman could tell you anything and it would be true. She was my family’s biggest secret. I remember she told my Aunt not to marry some dude because he was crazy, and she did anyway and Dude tried to kill her 2 months into the marriage.”

    “Granny kept everyone on point. She even told people about their past lives, who they were and why they were here. I’m serious. I mean, she used to tell me some crazy sh__ when I was younger, no lie. But my Mother was kinda like that too, all the Women in my family had something going with them. Not saying they didn’t go to Church and all that, but everyone knew Granny was on point. When I got older, I understood that she was into some other stuff too. Now Granny was conscious, she tried to teach us how to be conscious. Granny didn’t know sh--- about Africa, but she was conscious of self.”

    “ I remember once when she sat me down when I was like 14 or 15 and she knew I was getting into girls, like girls from my school would call the house from time to time. She got on me real hard about that. She said that I would be a Lady’s Man, she said girls like me not just because of how I look but my Soul had a scent to it that they liked. But she said I had 3 Women I would meet in my future, and that I was married to all 3 of these Women in different life times. She said I would find myself wanting to be with all three and if I decided to do so that would be OK. She told me that a part of me belonged to each of these Women.”

    “ You know at 14, it didn’t throw me off. I really didn’t think about it, I was young. I was wild. But when I got older and started thinking about it, I was like- did my Gran’mother really tell me that? I mean did she? She past away when I was like 22. She just gave up the ghost in her sleep. The whole family felt empty when she left, but we knew if anybody was still with us was her. I still have dreams about her from time to time. But when she left, and started thinking about all the stuff she used to tell me. Sometimes to be honest, I didn’t know if she was just playing with me.”

    “You know how some old people do, just tell you something to throw you off. But what she said happened. I always had females, here and there, but afterawhile, I was like- you know what I need to have just one girl, someone I can be there for, be there with- you know- just chill out. Once I made that decision, bam. She showed up. I was like 25, working in sales at the Gap. She came in there, and I was just playing with her asking for her number. We started going out, we are still together to this day. Man, that’s almost 5-6 years ago.”

    “ I mean, we bonded right away like we knew each other. Then, down the line about a week after me and Candice met, I met this other female and I mean, we really really bonded. I met her when I flew to Alabama to spend some time with my family. She sat next to me on the plane, she was flying in to see her Father, we both lived in the city. We exchanged numbers, the next thing I know- we’re such good friends- she’s inviting me out to parties and all this, I’m ditching my girl so I can do out with her, it was crazy.”

    “ Oh lord, then I ran into the 3rd female like, about 6 weeks after I met Lorraine. I met her at this same spot in fact. I was just getting into spoken word and making cds at my friend’s house. She’s a poet too. We hung out after the show and me and some other Cats were debating about religions and all that. We both had the same views on everything. We ended up going to the Wafflehouse and talking some more after that until about 4 in the morning."

    "And you know, all 3 of these Women are still in my life. The crazy thing is, I’m only with Candice, the other 2 are just friends. I know, but I’m for real. I think because, I don’t know- when my Gran’mother told me that, maybe it triggered the opposite. But guess what, Lorraine and Janet, the last 2 females- it’s like they can never keep a Man.”

    “ It’s like I’ve watched their lives spiral out of control just because I didn’t choose to have an intimate relationship with them…doesn’t that make sense? I mean, it’s like OK, had I choose to be with all of these Women, you know lie to them, deceive them, life would be fine. I’m not all that, but still I’m not a terrible dude. These are all successful Women, Candice works in marketing for coca-cola. Lorraine has her own business doing bridal showers. Janet manages like 2 Soul food restaurants. They’ve all told me, I really don’t want to be married, I just want a Man to be there for me, love me, etc. So this is some crazy *** sh---. And check this, they’ve all told me, I KNOW you’re my soul mate, I just know it, I can feel it. And it’s like because they know I’m their soulmate they can’t settle for anyone else. And even though I only have sex with Candice, it’s almost like they are Ok with me just being in their lives.”

    “All I’m saying is, being conscious is a mofocca. Sometimes I think ignorance it bliss, knowing too much can kill you. I just need to know enough to keep my black *** from going to jail, and enough to see what's coming so I can avoid it.”

    I overstood what Bro. Infinite was saying. He had a very interesting story. I guess being conscious of self should be enough.
    Yet knowing is only half the battle.
    What do we do with what we know?
     
  2. truetothecause

    truetothecause Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    ImHotep MetaSaience......AGAIN:SuN018:


    dang, dang, dang!

    See, now IF I had made a VIDEO, I would not have this problem.

    I typed a nice RE~ply to this thread...and bang!

    Computer went down and it's all gone :(

    I'll Be back and see which way to flow with it next, yet....I love the convo

    :hearts2:
     
  3. Enensa Aunghk

    Enensa Aunghk Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    The brother was on the right track about self knowledge but let's go deeper into it.

    A good point was made when the brother stated that if we were conscious of all things we would go crazy. Well, that depends on where your consciousness if focused. I am speaking about consciousness in a very specific sense, perception. And when studying self you can look outside (to books and interactions with others) can also look inside. This is something that has been researched by psychologists and theologians alike. To be technical, there are spiritual practices that are supposed to expand your awareness of self, and what happens is that they allow you to come intact with parts of you that you share with events or things beyond what you normally perceive to be your body. You see that your actions affect others and that these others at some level are interconnected with you.

    When you inspect your experience of self you see that you have a mind that is filled with thoughts, which come and go indepedently of what you do (automatically unless you willfully do something to manipulate the process).
    You also perceive sensations, you perceive smells, sounds, light, objects external to your body.

    You may also begin to see that what you call self is something that is not limited to your memories or thoughts in your head. There is something else that you can't quite put your finger on.

    This is just another approach to knowledge of self that is not talked about very often, an internal approach.



    The insight that his grandmother (correct me if I am misread) had that allowed her to know things before they happened, that ability is cultivated as a part systems of self knowledge. For example if you inspect the thoughts and images in your mind closely enough and in the right manner you may find that you have thoughts drifting in your mind that you didn't initiate. Something pops in your head or you get a "gut feeling" about somebody. And then it comes to pass. Of course there are other things involved in this process but in other words by knowing self you begin to arrive at knowledge. So then your studies of history have more insight that is not found in the books, and you are able to tap into aspects of yourself that are usually dormant in order to ACT on that knowledge. For example, knowledge of self should ultimately uplift our community no matter what system or religion we subscribe to as the source of our knowledge- right?

    So self knowledge should be the begining of all other knowledge, yes, but let's go deeper into it.
     
  4. truetothecause

    truetothecause Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Greetings Again....

    I'm going to make this short and hopefully, it will be to the point.

    First, Thank You MetaSaience for the post and the topic.

    I agree with Brother Infinite in his experiences of the "conscious" community as expressed in his poem.

    I further agree with this statement:
    There are times when I question my own sanity based on the feedback I get from those who consider themselves "conscious". I be wondering "conscious of what":?: what I'm doing or not, how I'm doing what I'm doing, why I'm doing that which I'm doing and saying etc...

    My "consciousness of self" came from looking at self AND I was then able to better "see" others/thee/WE and it is scary.
    This process of coming to "KNOW SELF" for M.E. began with my own journey into self. I tapped into my "third eye", the one which NO ONE ELSE SEE'S in me cause ALL they can "see" are my two eyes which are on the outside! That Third Eye is "inside", yet, it takes WORK (the work of therapy) to minimize utilization of those TWO eyes and focus on the Third.

    That "therapeutic" process supported M.E. with "seeing M.E." and low and behold, I BE~came able to "see" Thee better. I then continued this process by going to school and practicing in the mental health field and listening to the stories of the "folks in the Margins". Those would be the folks who the "conscious community" refer as "the masses"...those people who need to be educated about themselves and the struggle. Those folks who seemingly are mis-guided and engaging in continued self destructive behaviors. The ones who are consistently beat down by the "conscious"community. Some of those folks are the "Cosby" types, the "Revoluntionaries" etc.

    I realized WE as a people were truly in some deep do as I watched, listened, and experienced the interactions of the "conscious community" with themselves and others.

    It seems people have an extremely difficult time seeing self, and I KNOW this to emanate from a variety of sources. There is some much S**T floating about, people doing the best they can to "stay clean" and have little time to do the work of really using that Third Eye and look at themselves.
    Everytime WE point a finger at someone's behaviors or thinking, there are three pointing back at us. THREE!...not One...so there is WORK to do.

    It is or was a painful journey for M.E. into self, and I trust this is true for others who have and continue to take that journey. We are built to "move away from pain" therefore, WE tend to move away from self and attempt to separate ourselves from the painful memories we carry. I wish I had a dime for everytime someone suggested to M.E. there was no need to "look in the past" cause it was "over" as if one could erase their MEMORY banks and start over...smh...yet, it IS ABOUT Sankofa!

    Let's see, where am I now:?:

    I concur with this sentiment as well.

    For M.E. it is a constant and consistent journey and I ALWAYS look at myself first and foremost, with ALL that I share with and/or in relation to another. That means, if I am saying or suggesting something to someone else, I have already applied to self AND...I do so again based on the person's response to M.E. In that conversation Mama Destee and I had for example, I have been looking at myself in terms of what I learned about M.E. as it relates to the things I shared with her, how am I doing any of that, what is my position in terms of what I chose to Do (give, stay). This may not be very clear and this is a point I would want to TALK freely in action with...(interaction direct) to clarify myself, yet, I DO wish to "get back on the wagon" of WRITING as I also value this medium of expression AND I'm clear about the world in which We live.



    What I do with it is attempt to SHARE that which I've learned....I attempt to SHARE M.E. yet..

    In the rooms of RE~covery there is a saying "We keep what we have by giving it away". This I realize has it's inherent dangers when I think of sharing my "pain". I dont' want to give it to anyone and I don't want to keep it. Yet, I sense there is a purpose for the pain I have. What that is I don't know yet. I can only know as I continue to meditate on it I work to "practice what I preach and teach".
    seems people Don't want M.E. at least not as I Am. They want M.E. on THEIR TERMS.
    So I'm comfronted with another dilemma...I'm tired of journeying from place to place, community to community only to find the same stuff.
    Some may say, "you get what you are looking for" yet, I be looking for L.O.V.E and looking to simply share L.O.V.E. M.E.

    Crazy making always checking myself so as to not wreck myself (Step 10) is a moffoca and then be told "don't take it personal" as if one can truly SEPARATE themselves from themselves.

    On yes, that is the white way..."divide and conquer", "categorize", "compartmentalize", "trivilize" one thing while "maximizing" another..etc..etc...etc...

    Anywho, that was not very "short" after all...my bag of s***
    I accept it and take responsibility for it.

    Yes..one other thing I learned and practice..the three A's of RE~covery for those who are "co-dependent"
    Awarness, Acceptance then Action
    Acceptance of Our own stuff is hard work and Action (at least healthy action) is not likely to take place until this part of the process is done

    And ..Let it Begin with M.E.

    :hearts2:
     
  5. Keita Kenyatta

    Keita Kenyatta going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    Well, first of all...this sounds like a phase I went through, you know...the idea of being TOO CONSCIOUS. There is no such thing. What happens is that, the more you digest the bigger your belly gets...and like all meals that you eat something got to come out somewhere. in other words, if you eat you got to release. I think this is why I write books...it keeps me sane and allows elimination or release to take place so that my mind and body remain balanced. However, let me put it another way.

    Our world history is too vast and intermingled with others on this planet and knowing alllows you universal intercourse with self and the world. Furthermore, you may know or learn enough to change ALL THIS STUFF since all this stuff relates to you in one form or another. Too conscious? Never!!
    In fact, the more conscious you become the more you dictate what, when, where, how and if you will or will not be the force that others need and are seeking...for you know not who you touch or who they may touch that may in fact be the force themselves to start a world revolution.
     
  6. FaithSoulSistah

    FaithSoulSistah Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Well what I have found personally is that many people expect you to compromise, yet it may never cross their minds to do so themselves. And then you can find yourself in a situation as you described above where you are not free to be authentically you, but the other person is. But if I'm the only one attempting compromise, I tend to walk away. One-sided relationships do nothing but engender anger and resentment, at least on my part.
     
  7. Metaverse

    Metaverse Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Great convo Family-

    There are so many great thinkers and poets at these poetry spots, I'm sure all us have at least one in whatever city we live. It's like the last open public forum we have where we can be and express who we are. Naturally Bro. Infinite was pointing around the room at people he may not have been that in sync with. Actually, we have the same things happening right here at this forum from time to time.

    I admit I'm guilty of that too. Sometimes the problem arise when we suggest to ourselves or others, that we are somehow immune from what's going on because we are "conscious." We are all sick to some degree. It's no way we can exist in this madhouse and not become sick, we all breathe the same air, which is toxic. But what some of us have, and I appreciate it- is a way to deal with our illness, a way to deal with our sickness and a way to deal with our disease.

    I've always known the difference between the "well-read" and the "conscious." For me personally, I only read to confirm things I already know or suspect, that way I can give people a point of reference. I know many of us do the very same thing. I agree that being conscious has to do with self, yet by understanding self we can learn more about others and all things around us.

    Even though Bro. Infinite's story goes deeper into the metaphysical of life beyond the body, it does still deal with the body. Being conscious of "where" I have been and "who" I have been at all times, is very important. I can look at the Brotha hanging out on the corner, and say to myself- hummm- I remember when I was that Brother. Now, I should say or do something for this Brotha that I would've wanted someone to say to me in I was in that situation. That's still being conscious of self, because he is my self, I was him at one point in time.

    If a Brotha walks up to me, and with a sincere face asks me for money because life just isn't going well for him right now. "Where and Who" again comes into play. He is my self. I was him, or could be him. So what would I ask of myself in this situation? Not a lecture. I just give him what he asks for and ask the Ancestors to provide for him.

    On some levels, sometimes we act like we "don't know" what is going on with our people. Now, that's not being "conscious" you don't have to be psychic or super spiritual to be conscious, you just have to be aware enough to put two and two together. As conscious people on this site, we should be able to know all that's going on with us, without knowing one another personally. You can read it. It's all over how we write and communicate with one another. We can't equate consciousness with perfection either. That's only one step. Opening the 3rd eye is just one step. Knowing how to define what we experience when our 3rd eye is open is another step. Knowing how to communicate what we see when our 3rd eye is open is yet another step.

    Two people looking at the same sky with their 3rd eye open may see a different reality. We have to be aware of that, and be intelligent enough to extract the truth out of two opposite experiences. One person says they see a blue sky, another persons says they see a black sky. We have to know then that they are talking about the same sky, but at different times. With our 3rd eye open, we don't all see the same thing. Some of us see the present, while some of us see the past or future.

    There is a divine reason why some of us see the future, while some of us do not. There is a divine reason why some of us can see into the past, while some of us do not. Not different degrees of consciousness. Not different degrees of knowledge at all. We "channel" different information, but information that is relevant to the whole.
     
  8. FaithSoulSistah

    FaithSoulSistah Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I think you're right that it all is relevant. And that can be a challenge because we tend to have an all-or-nothing attitude. When really nobody is always right or always wrong. We should take the best and discard the rest, I suppose.
     
  9. MenNefer

    MenNefer Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Settling the score

    *Greetings from Ancient Kamit*

    For me (At times) it's just like THAT moment when those drugged individuals woke up in The movie Cube or Hyper Cube.
    (I had to stop smoking the Fruits)
    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    I had/have to acknowledge how much reliance is placed on rules for exchanging ideas and the emphasis placed on boundaries, scales, classification systems, and the emotional tumult that ensues. Its like I'm in the middle of a shared experience of transition; earmarked by sensitivities...fears ...sorta like what dude on room 1408 was going through:

    [​IMG]


    Its like all of the animal reflexes/instincts that served the organism well for survival are under an assault or proverbial labor pains by conforming to the complexities of the cerebral/frontal cortex ...(Animal meets Machine)

    Its like I have been simultaneously born onto a battle field with my opposing self in a realm that mutually incubates us towards a showdown. I learn to masquerade when need be and I deflect through my use of cultural norms ...I feel like I can be candid using an aberrant form of vernacular that may attract aspects of myself shrouded in temperamental diversity. They tell me they are confused or that I over complicate but they continue to try to understand me long after others have moved on.

    (What do I do with what I Know?) I seek to love cautiously but not defensively....boycott the conceptual paradigms that insist that I am anything else but "YOU" until somehow a culture of "YOU being Eye" burgeons like 911 (Emerge-and-See)
     
  10. Fine1952

    Fine1952 Happy Winter Solstice MEMBER

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    Thx for sharing, MetaSaience!

    This young brother is keenly perceptive, thx in part to his Grandmother, no doubt.

    However, he speaks of his own physical/karnal/animalistic consciousness rather than his deeper, divine consciousness which of course is higher.

    I thought what he said was endearing; however, the content failed to project or reveal his discovery of anything on a divine level....

    Fine1952
    :golf:
     
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