Little Toni. How could I have done what I did with you? That you were willing, sweet juices readily conceded, that you were enamored of me, your eyes and heart clearly said, that I took advantage of you, has filled my thoughts filled with red embarrassment at being guided by such a cad while you smiled a new teenagers smile, I knew it wasn’t that bad, but I knew that it wasn’t that good, to gallop with one so tender in age, although reason said I had done all I could, my true feelings were not so easy to gauge. Young tender Toni, it makes no difference that I was not the first, because I should have known better, but by pretending to go along I may have been the worst that ever happened to such a young precious thing, letting you seduce me with your girlish song, I burn for pretending I was real, when I was just going along with what I wanted, even though you said it too, but I should have known better than to depend upon even me or you. Just turned 14, four years and a world of difference, bewteen we two, but maybe it is only hindsight that embarrasses me seeing the unrestrained self, so much so that I fogotto do what is right perhaps, I have forgotten how Spanish eyes and sun kissed skin can blur boundaries and make reason insignificant when a a young man begins to think like men. No, you were not a mistake then and you are not a mistake now, it is simply me salving my conscious hoping that I have caused you no harm, and that your memories are still as vivid as mine, when we shared lives in another place and another time.