Kem's "I'm Missing Your Love" plays in my ears.... Kem's "I'm missing Your Love" plays in my ears.... My mental is disturbed and my system unbalanced while I sit completely perturbed. Look around the room. Eyes taking in Tear drenched pillows, rumpled sheets and a bed in disarray. Objects askew and paintings on the ground like abstract dew. Somewhere along the way I dreamt.... no, I experienced and soon realized that there was a scream deep in me that needed to see the light and sound of day outside of me. Bitten fingernails and and the etchings of pain across the canvas of my face; I can hardly recognize the old me and for the first time in my lifetime I’m living in funky, hard captivity. Today the sun sends me another day and I wipe the frost off of my window. For the first time I'm staring at the reflection of pain and a chilling feel of loneliness. On the floor scattered are torn letters and declarations of love, affection and an eternity.... Breathless echoes of passion and laughter... nothing more but empty visions and colorless images. Clenched tissues drenched in snot, saliva and the salty taste of tears. An entire night's worth of deep pain and feelings of being abysmal. On the table next to the bed, a half empty glass of whiskey...last night Jack Daniels was my bed partner. Last night he held me in his arms and numbed my raw and ragged feelings and for a time I sailed far beyond this s***! In a locked room, sitting by the window lost in memories of the shining past and bleak-a** future I refuse to walk in the social stream. How can I when I entertain such pain and thoughts of murder? I never knew what it felt like to hear someone tell you... There is no us, because I Never Loved You! Copyright 2004 ~PropheticNsyght the black 'Othello'