Black People : Child Support

Discussion in 'Black People Open Forum' started by river, Apr 5, 2010.

  1. river

    river Watch Her Flow MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2004
    Messages:
    6,458
    Likes Received:
    1,282
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Author
    Location:
    Where the Niger meets the Nile
    Ratings:
    +1,290
    Hey Brothas,

    I came accross this story and was rather intrigued by the polarity of feelings that must be involved. The woman and her friends. The man and his friends. She is not even referred to as a woman but as a female. Thought I'd run it by you and now I have two questions.

    1. In your mind and heart is there a difference between a woman and a female?

    2. Is it right for a man to have to pay child support for a ten year old child he has never seen who has been addopted by the mother's husband just because the husband is unable?

     
  2. Kemetstry

    Kemetstry going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Feb 19, 2001
    Messages:
    20,941
    Likes Received:
    5,245
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Chemist
    Location:
    Detroit
    Ratings:
    +6,128
    The law states that he has to pay support for at least the remaining years the child is under 18. Is it right? It is what it is. Homie ASSumed he was off the hook. He should have never kept in touch with her. Eight years, she should not know where to find him. lol

    :toast:

    YES, there is a big difference between a woman and a female. He was being very nice and not calling her what he may have wanted to. Anything over the age of 18 is not an adult. Therefore it shouldnt be given the designation of one. Mookie is NOT a man. You laying with him and having a kid with him doesnt make him one. Gwuanetta having a baby, being a certain age, doesnt make her a woman. The adult reference should be left for actual adults.

    :geek:













    :em0200:

     
  3. HyperKill

    HyperKill Banned MEMBER

    Joined:
    Dec 18, 2009
    Messages:
    837
    Likes Received:
    319
    Ratings:
    +319
    I agree completely, having a baby doesnt make you two a man or woman. It simply means you are fertile and hornie. I also agree strongly that if you decide to leave a cheating woman, especially one who cheats while pregnant, it'll be best if you never contact her or that child until he is 18. You could create a horrific finacial situation for yourself. The man she left him for should have proven to her that he is a good example for a child and a provider. Not just an adequate fill up for her empty spaces. Forget all that hub bub about "the child needs to hav a relationship with his real daddy flap". If that was important, make sure the real dad stays around if he is not abusive, alcoholic, etc. I also think it distorts the mind of a child to have a pay from a distance part time daddy visit him and mom while some other man lays with her every night or so. Whomever, if anyone, is in home with his mom should accept the child with the woman and in the case the actuall dad finds love elsewhere, he also should accept the woman's kids, if she has kids. The divorce courts and DHS have decimated families in this country and we are feeling the effects now and will feel more painful effects in the future.
     
  4. Bootzey

    Bootzey Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2008
    Messages:
    1,901
    Likes Received:
    770
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Don't Ask
    Location:
    Metro ATL
    Ratings:
    +862
    All the previous posters where looking at this scenario from the perspective of the parents. But there is a child to consider. Anybody stop to wonder how the child is doing? Does not the child have the right to support until he/she is old enough to supposrt self? Does not the child have the basic right to KNOW who was biologically involved with their conception? To meet his or her biological family? Now a days folks are way tooooooo selfish.



    Peace
     
  5. HyperKill

    HyperKill Banned MEMBER

    Joined:
    Dec 18, 2009
    Messages:
    837
    Likes Received:
    319
    Ratings:
    +319
    Yes in deed, we are a selfish bunch. Look at the thread again and as you will see, for her own selfish desires, wants, etc, she created a situation that took out all you mentioned the child needed. Actions have consequenses and the selfishness of infedelity will effect the childs life forever. Sad but true
     
  6. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2001
    Messages:
    34,787
    Likes Received:
    8,982
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    betwixt and between
    Ratings:
    +9,680
    Hi Sister River ... :wave:

    Question #1 ... yes, there is a difference between a woman and a female. A 2 year old little girl is a female, but she is not a woman.

    Question #2 ... If the Mother's new husband had in fact adopted the child, which requires the biological Father to relinquish all parental rights, then no ... she can't come to him any time later, expecting child support.

    But that's not what happened. He just remained a deadbeat Dad, hoping every moment of his life, probably shaking in his boots every day, hoping someone else would pay for his penis errors / adventures, being the obvious punk that he is, demonstrating no responsibility to his own seed, always hoping that this knock on the door ... requiring him to be accountable for the babies he's made ... never comes. So ... yep ... in this case, he's got to pay the price for making a baby, and I hope they go back and get him for all the years of the child, not just beginning at age 10 ... when he was finally found, hiding under some rock, where cowards reside.

    It's pitiful to read any man encouraging another, to run and hide from their own seed / children, out of fear of having to be responsible for them.

    No wonder we are where we are.

    Love You!

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  7. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2001
    Messages:
    34,787
    Likes Received:
    8,982
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    betwixt and between
    Ratings:
    +9,680
    Okay Sister River ... i just read the link ... :)

    Some are saying within it, that paternity needs to be determined, but my response above is based on what appears to be his own positive determination of paternity :

    So I would suggest a paternity test first, making sure he is the Father, then make him pay for all the years.

    Love You!

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  8. Bootzey

    Bootzey Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2008
    Messages:
    1,901
    Likes Received:
    770
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Don't Ask
    Location:
    Metro ATL
    Ratings:
    +862
    The adult's right and desires are negated by the child's needs. Everyone involved owes this child a debt and I don't care who gets to pay as long as someone does.
     
  9. MsInterpret

    MsInterpret Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Apr 21, 2007
    Messages:
    8,999
    Likes Received:
    5,439
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Washington
    Ratings:
    +5,447
    I know this is for the male perspective but I must speak on this.

    This is challenging.

    To me it seems like this man knew where his kids were. Someone knew her and knew where she was.

    It's not like trying to find Osama Bin Ladin. CS can find anyone, especially if you owe child support. Unless you are sneaky enough to change your identity...But anyways...

    This other man signed the birth certificate. Basically claiming it to be his, assuming them role as father. He should be paying child support.

    But if this other man wants to be in his child's life he needs to take a paternity test and if it is proven to be his and he WANTS to be in the child's life he needs to pay child support.

    And as far as the word "female"...She could have been called a whole lot worse for what she did.

    To me from the short summary I read, she was playing this dude. Probably told him it was his kid, but was really some other man's baby.

    And she is even more scandalous for coming after this guy for child support, after all these years because her husband is in jail.

    SELFISH...FEMALE!!!
     
  10. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2001
    Messages:
    34,787
    Likes Received:
    8,982
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    betwixt and between
    Ratings:
    +9,680
    Sister MsInterpret ... how do you reason that the other man ... the one who is not the biological Father ... be held responsible for child support?

    How can you give him the great responsibility from the act, when he didn't get any of the good stuff from it?! He took no part in the sex, the creation of the child.

    How are you saying this Sister ... i don't understand.

    :heart:

    Destee
     
Loading...