Black Parenting : Caught with their Pants Down

Discussion in 'Black Parenting' started by sweetbrownsugar, Jan 18, 2005.

  1. sweetbrownsugar

    sweetbrownsugar Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Serious Question. For those of you who have little children (sons, daughters, nieces, nephews,cousins, etc) What would you do if you walked in on two LITTLE kids trying to "hump" One of them being your child. -Back in the day, it was called playing "Mommy & Daddy" OR "Playing House". What would you do? How would you react?
     
  2. sweetbrownsugar

    sweetbrownsugar Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Sometimes, little kids who have "seen" what they shouldn't have seen(whether by TV, Other little kids, or Watching a parent or parents who are not careful in the home) will try to experiment what they see. So it happens. Again, what would you do? How would you react?
     
  3. panafrica

    panafrica Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Hmmm! I'll put it like this, the "belt" is not just for keeping your pants up!
     
  4. indya

    indya Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I disagree with you here. It depends on their age, 3 year olds doing "show me yours" are just being innocently curious. My son showed the neighbor girl his at 3, I sat him down and explained that we don't show people our private parts. He wouldn't have understood if I'd just gotten angry and spanked him. They don't know what they're doing is wrong unless we explain it to them at that age.
     
  5. panafrica

    panafrica Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Not the 1st time we've disagreed Indya!
     
  6. indya

    indya Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I keep hoping some day you'll see the light and realize I'm always right. :rolling:
     
  7. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    I first try to teach this very thing is wrong and very private, also i try my best to
    express the wrongs and rights the do's and dont 's to my children and never
    try to duplicate what they hear or see from T.V / or streets /and any other means
    as far as parents that's what doors and locking it for (Privacy) so children can't
    walk in , i don't think i would lift my belt but i would give a deep good talking too
    next time my belt do the talking for me , children can do and say things you would
    never believebut they so lovable.
     
  8. panafrica

    panafrica Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Oh Really? Don't hold your breath waiting for that one Indya! Spanking should always happen in conjunction with verbal correction. Sweetbrown can choose to talk to the other parent(s); however, in today's time parents are not as responsible as they used to be in terms of monitoring/caring about their children's behavior (as one who works with teens & parents everyday I know this). As a result, her primary concern...her only concern is the conduct of her children. She can try to monitor what her child watches to prevent this from happening again; however, this a preventative measure, and does not address the immediate situation. Spanking is used to address serious behavioral issues, this is not throwing away food or having a tantrum. The situation calls for a more serious approach.

    In today's time children are having sex as young as 8 years old! Indeed young girls are having their periods as young as 8 years old, and getting pregnant at 10 & 11 (in some cases even young). It is extremely important to cease such behavior before it continues. Spanking is appropriate when children are too young to fully grasp the danger of certain behaviors. Are you going to give your 3 year old a sex education class Indya? Do you really think a 3 year old will really understand what you are telling them? I have a child around that age, and I watch her class mates (day care center)....most can't even complete a sentence! Punishments and verbal corrections are more appropriate when children are older, and better capable of understanding its meaning.
     
  9. Radical Faith

    Radical Faith Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Children learn things by two methods. One is by imitiation or play and the other is by repetition or practice. For children to play "house" or "mommy and daddy" is obvisiously imitiation of what they have seen. This is why it's very important what images our children are being exposed to. As parents not only must we monitor our homes but other homes or centers where our children spend their time as well. If a child is pretending to have sex by humping another child there are some serious issues going on. Sure many children have done this and maybe they turned out fine but it goes back to the question, what has that child been exposed to? As adults if we walk in on something like that we should without blowing up question the child or children as to what they are doing, if they understand what they are doing and where they learned it from? Only once you've gained satisfactory answers to these questions then you sit the children down and explain the reality of what they were imitating. Also you find the source of the imitated behavior and eliminate it from that childs life by any means. If it's someone elses child is displaying this type of behavior then address the issue with their parents imediately. If this is your child behaving this way after you've talked about it then like Brother Pan said it time for some negative reinforment. i.e. the belt, the switch, the paddle, hotwheels racing track(old school), etc. Spare the rod and spoil the child. Either way there are effective ways of dealing this situation.


    Peace

    Radical Faith
     
  10. sweetbrownsugar

    sweetbrownsugar Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    In this case, The older child 9 Knew better. Was definitely acting out something he'd seen upon a FOUR year old who didn't know better. -That's unbelievable. FOUR? I would be SO FURIOUS. They were cousins. The parent, mom of the four year old. Single Parent. Hysterical. Whooped them Both and Scolded them too. ( " I better not ever catch y'all doing something like this again!) And that was that. She ask me what would I do? Was she right in whooping them and scolding them? I Really had to think about it myself. 9 years old? That's old enough to know better. So he definitely would've got the belt! Especially if he were a relative. I probably would've sat my 4yr old down and had a good talking to with her. What's the minimum age do you began having talks about "sex" with little children who outgrow the "no showing private parts" talk? Because the 9 year old seems to need one of those.
     
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