Black Entertainment : Black men telling his own truth about Black women.

Discussion in 'Black Entertainment' started by Black-king, Oct 6, 2011.

  1. Black-king

    Black-king Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    This is a video to prove that the blaming and frustration of our people come both ways. This brother made some valid points about certain Black women. You can agree or disagree but what he said have some truth , just like the video posted by Msinterpret about the Sista vlogging about Black men bashing. All I can is that white supremacists are laughing at us.

     
  2. info-moetry

    info-moetry STAFF STAFF

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    Geez...........let it rest already!!

    Be a black man and let the black woman be a black woman and place her back on her throne, then everything will work itself out!
     
  3. Black-king

    Black-king Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I agree with you on the most part about being taking responsibility of our roles, but the problem is too many of our people get caught up in the blame game. To place the Black woman back on her throne , she would have to acknowledge you first as her king. The complaint of the brother in this video is that the Black women see the Black men as their enemies. You can't put your enemies on your throne. This is the whole Willie Lynch strategy in effect today.
     
  4. info-moetry

    info-moetry STAFF STAFF

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    Why would you place conditions on the black woman in order to be able to deal positively with her? This is the problem, black men expecting so much from her without those same conditions being applied to self, FIRST!

    The black woman does not have to acknowledge me as her KING in order for me to show her the love and respect she rightfully deserves.

    btw, you already acknowledge yourself as 'king' with your screen name, so why would you need the black woman to re-confirm that for you unless you don't feel your screen name to be true??
     
  5. Black-king

    Black-king Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Well we are going in a total different direction than what intended the video to be about. But my original point was that both Black men and women are bashing each other,with some adequate reasoning to back up their frustrations but they were ignoring the main enemy.

    You are taking the thread off topic, I am not advocating to disrespect Black women here. She will be respected if she deserves it as you put it but she has to deserve it.

    We are talking about two different things here. Your original point was that to put the Black woman back on her throne. My response she would have to acknowledge you as king first for you to be able to do that. If the white man is her ideal man as it is for many of them out there, I wouldn't put her near my throne. The fact is there are many Black women out there who despise Black men and will love anybody else but a Black man. You can try to show her love and respect but like I said the slave mentality and its effects are deeply rooted in many of these people that it will render all your effort to nothing. You can say the same for many Black men But that's a different topic from my original intent of posting this video.
     
  6. info-moetry

    info-moetry STAFF STAFF

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    I guess i just don't know that many black woman who advocate dating white boys which is why this topic get's under my skin.... Even with that said, i still say she doesn't have to acknowledge me as her 'king'. THat's like asking her to bow down to you just in order to be with you as you haven't stated what it is that makes you so 'king' worthy...

    THere's no way to 'try and show her love and respect', you either do it or you don't.

    You seem to be talking about woman who are on some sort of low level, like a hood rat or something....lol Again, in my circumference i just don't have a lot of GIRLS like that around. I know beautiful black woman who hold themselves and their community up in the highest regard and wouldn't dare deal with a man who said they had to acknowledge him as their 'king'. That to them is a title that it is earned, not given in this day and age...

    Now i have sisters and some of their friends sound like who you and others are talking about, but again i even keep that at a distance.... I
     
  7. NyneElementz

    NyneElementz Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Black King,

    In a way, I'm glad you posted the video and continued to respond. And I totally agree with the fact that this type of stuf causes bigots to laugh at us, because it's pointless. But for the sake of the discussion, I'd like to point out a few things about about what you said that I agree with. I hope noone takes this as a pessimistic look, but will look at their surroundings, see the pattern, and finally choose to be different than those engaging in these sad little games, whether on or off the net.

    "but the problem is too many of our people get caught up in the blame game"

    True, and unfortunately, it will not stop.

    Sadly, most of our people, black men and women included, love taking the easy way out by blaming the opposite sex. And I know it will offend many to say this, but black women are better at this than black men. Not only are they good at blaming, but anything that a brother will use as a defense or even as reasoning will get shut down by a slew of sisters as an excuse. Granted, many reasons ARE excuses, but the same is true for the reasonings that most sisters use. Brothers did not use you without you allowing and enabling them to use you - that's the TRUTH about the situations you found yourselves in. The responsive deflection from sisters is: stop the excuses and be a man. We have excuses - but your definition of expected manhood is never defined, not even in specific broad terms! So how are brothers going to improve themselves, especially when you aren't giving them anything to work with? And what about your roles in all of these things you have experienced? Why is it an honorable thing for you to abandon responsibility but for us to shoulder all of it? Isn't that a lack of balance?! Can we really have successful black relationships if we cling to imbalances like the blame game?

    Looking at the future loss of my marriage, it would be easy for me to say that my wife is to blame, because I did try my best to be a good husband. But the truth is that I did not consider the manner of woman I was connected to. She was cheated on by her former husband, had been in sexual relationships with married men after her first divorce who constantly fed her lies about what manhood was, wore the perceptual mask of being honest while having had a life of mastering manipulation and deception, did not know how to address issues that she saw as problematic without adding hurtful insults and assaulting your character - all to make herself feel better about herself, was unhappy that she gave up her adulterous relationships for me because of all the financial perks those relationships offered, and was an unrelenting control freak. Had I taken the time to know this about her and not rushed into marrying her because of what she appeared to be to me, I would not have made the choice to marry her. But I did make thatchoice, so the responsibility for my choice is mine alone, regardless of her character or lack thereof. It takes both courage and maturity and honesty with self to get to that point. And here's even more truth - she may very well be going back to those same patterns while transitioning into life without me, so that would make me a foolish man to pine over her or to think now that all black women are like this. I would be especially foolish making comments like, "PREACH," or paying attention to the details of his argument at the instance of seeing a video like this, because it does nothing in the way of me taking responsibility for my choices. Without that quality resident in the video, the video is pointless. And even more pointless are the arguments agreeing with or arguing against what the brother is saying.

    "The complaint of the brother in this video is that the Black women see the Black men as their enemies."

    Many black women DO see black men as their enemy, while claiming they love black men in the same breath. It happens too many times. But you know what? There are black women who do not. So rather than complain about the ones who see me as their enemy (and they really aren't hard to spot - even with their elaborate facades), I'll seek out those who do not. That's an almost impossible task, but I've chosen to be willing to take that risk, especially considering how tired I am of those who see me as their enemy, act out that belief, then deny their hatred of me. I don't have to be the enemy of any black woman and will deny any sista who sees me that way the satisfaction of making me her enemy. That is the choice I'm making, and in the end, the results that my decision will produce will be far more powerful than that which complaints produce.
     
  8. NyneElementz

    NyneElementz Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Dear Info-moetry,

    I'd like to address the questions, if I may.

    "Why would you place conditions on the black woman in order to be able to deal positively with her? This is the problem, black men expecting so much from her without those same conditions being applied to self, FIRST!"

    BOTH genders are guilty of this!! But what Black King was indicating with his comment, or at least it is what I perceived, is that only royalty can recognize royalty. In other words, to keep things peaceable, we must deal with each other from a stance of equality, and if you expect to be admired and respected by black men, why is it wrong for those same black man to expect the same from black women?

    "The black woman does not have to acknowledge me as her KING in order for me to show her the love and respect she rightfully deserves."

    I am assuming however that it would be good for you if she returns the same love and respect you give her also, right? That isn't too much to ask, is it? Perhaps that is what is meant by acknowledging a black man as her king - addressing him with respect, dignity, compassion, and love, maybe?

    "btw, you already acknowledge yourself as 'king' with your screen name, so why would you need the black woman to re-confirm that for you unless you don't feel your screen name to be true??"

    This is a conversation, not a competition. A screen name is a screen name, and a difference of opinion is not worth the character attack, attack on any pride the brother has, nor an insult to the screen name he chose.

    As far as why we need a woman to affirm us, it is not a need, but I promise you that any lack of it in a relationship causes problems. If you read the bible, or believe it has any truth in it, it speaks of the virtuous woman doing a man good andnot evil in proverbs 31. It also speaks of the value encouraging words in the book of proverbs. It also affirms the man as the head of the wife in the book of Ephesians. Certainly, no bible reference establishes mere men as kings, but certainly places him in a position of respect. Further, Proverbs 17:17 says that a friend loves at all times and a brother is born for adversity. This trait indicates that anyone who loves you will stand by you, be there with you, and build you up, no matter what.

    You may have a different faith or viewpoint than I do, but from where I stand, if God acknowledges encuraging and reaffirming the one you love, I see no reason why expecting this as a black man from a black woman is unreasonable, especially considering that she has the same expectation of me.
     
  9. Black-king

    Black-king Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    You're are asking irrelevant and off topic questions that are meant to insult and start flame war than have a decent conversation. You are the one who want to put Black Woman back to her throne, you should ask yourself the question. How simple.

    It seems that we are talking about two different topics here, so I'll let this pass?

    Just because you don't have girls like that around you don't mean they don't exist. The women I am talking about aren't the so called hoodrats only, many corporate Black women these days prefer other men than Black men. I think nyneelements got my point Its all about self hatred in our community that we have to get rid off.[/QUOTE]
     
  10. NyneElementz

    NyneElementz Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Definitely, those type of women do exist, those who prefer other men than black men, and in large numbers. And they are nowhere near being "hoodrats" or 'low-level'. In fact, I would suggest to you that such women with this preference is the result of them internalizing the idea that there are no good black men around, filling themselves of hatred against black men, which eventually turns inward. I would also suggest to you that the same cycle happens within many black men, many of whom in heart are decent at heart and filled with the potential to beamong the brightest of today's black men, if only they would stop becoming a part of the vicious cycle of blacme gaming and decide to make different choices in the black women they choose.

    I do agree that there is too much self-hatred in our community, butlet me be clear to the extent at which I agree. There is too much self-hatred in the many among black men andwomen who allow anger to become their reason. I saw this video and the video the sisters did. The two things I saw in common was (1) anger and (2) the valid points that feuled it.

    One things that I did not see in either video was an honest account of what role they played in the casusing of their own unhappiness in their relationships. Instead, everyone made general assumptions about the opposite sex's attitudes towards one another. For years, Malcolm X stressed the importance of each of us taking responsibility for our choices in the ways we deal with one another. And so many of us black men and black women have lost sight of that.

    Honestly, gentlemen, this debate is as pointless as the debate women have on this subject. The revolution on this front is limited to you as individuals, making the choices to be different than the men who get caught up in consciously and unconsciously hating one another, their women, and eventually themselves.

    Oh, and black King, I did actually watch the video, and I disagree with the brother on one point. In the point he made about a terrorist attack on a black cruise, how men would only take care of their own family...naturally I would secure them first. And if I could, I'd save a few others, if for no other purpose than to put hope in their hearts again that there must be black men like me out there, and to inspire them to change their outlook,their choices, and their actions. It may work, it may not work. If none of the others would be saved, then I leave with my family and with a clear conscience.
     
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