Black Jokes Humor : Bad Witness!

Discussion in 'Black Jokes Humor' started by panafrica, Mar 21, 2005.

  1. panafrica

    panafrica Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2002
    Messages:
    10,227
    Likes Received:
    191
    Location:
    The Diaspora
    Ratings:
    +194
    Lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren't prepared
    for the answer.

    In a trial, in a small Southern town the prosecuting
    attorney called his first witness, a grand-motherly, elderly woman
    to the stand.

    He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

    She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you
    since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

    The Lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across
    the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"

    She again replied, "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
    youngster too. He's lazy! , bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He
    can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is
    one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his
    wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know
    him." The defense attorney almost died.

    The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very
    quiet voice, said, "If either of you bastards asks her if she knows me,
    I'll throw your sorry @sses in jail"
     
  2. PurpleMoons

    PurpleMoons Administrator STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Apr 22, 2003
    Messages:
    9,146
    Likes Received:
    1,097
    Gender:
    Female
    Ratings:
    +1,102
  3. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2001
    Messages:
    69,983
    Likes Received:
    3,977
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    BUSINESS owner
    Location:
    Da~WINDY*CITY //CHICAGO
    Ratings:
    +4,177
    that was one of the best i've heard .....hahahahahaha!! lol
    what a witness she was
     
  4. 1poetsought

    1poetsought Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2003
    Messages:
    6,642
    Likes Received:
    539
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Poet
    Location:
    The Lone-Star State
    Ratings:
    +604
    Here come 'da Judge

    Best laugh I've had all day! :welldone:
     
  5. triniti424

    triniti424 Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    Singapore
    Joined:
    May 13, 2003
    Messages:
    6,477
    Likes Received:
    110
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Servant of the People
    Location:
    Bay Area, CA
    Ratings:
    +131
  6. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2001
    Messages:
    69,983
    Likes Received:
    3,977
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    BUSINESS owner
    Location:
    Da~WINDY*CITY //CHICAGO
    Ratings:
    +4,177
    still feeling the depth of this bad witness i guess it was mis. lulu
     
  7. Khasm13

    Khasm13 STAFF STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 26, 2003
    Messages:
    10,784
    Likes Received:
    4,235
    Gender:
    Male
    Ratings:
    +4,472
    lololololololololololololololol
     
  8. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2003
    Messages:
    16,340
    Likes Received:
    114
    Location:
    Northeast
    Ratings:
    +122
    Hmmmm...Do you suppose the judge may have had something to hide, or did Mrs. Jones just like to embellish things? LOL
     
  9. river

    river Watch Her Flow MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2004
    Messages:
    6,458
    Likes Received:
    1,282
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Author
    Location:
    Where the Niger meets the Nile
    Ratings:
    +1,290
    That's what you call a summary judgement.

    Order in the court!

    lololololololo0l
     
  10. dstny

    dstny Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    May 27, 2004
    Messages:
    378
    Likes Received:
    6
    Ratings:
    +6
Loading...