Black Women : Are women really bad friends to one another?

Discussion in 'Black Women - Mothers - Sisters - Daughters' started by MsInterpret, Nov 22, 2010.

  1. MsInterpret

    MsInterpret Well-Known Member MEMBER

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  2. MimiBelle

    MimiBelle Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Hey all.
    New to the board. First comment.

    Some women are bad friends. Some are good.
    Some women are too quick to call others 'friend'. Others aren't.
    Some are fine keeping 'frenemies'...others aren't.

    If some women can't be good friends and entertain bullsh*t...it has nothing to do with me. I don't know what other women do...and I don't care.
    I don't agree with making this a 'woman' issue.
    It really isn't.

    I know 'friendless' males, too. Men double-cross their friends, too.
    What of that?
    *shrug*

    Personally, I'll be glad when I can stop being 'black women' or 'women', in general, and am allowed to simply be an 'individual'.
    In truth, I spend more time fighting my own for the right to be such than I do anyone else..and I'm wholly tired of being held personally responsible for the romantic/emotional/psychological/Mommy Issues of every individual who happens to share my culture and gender.
    But that's another topic...
     
  3. MsInterpret

    MsInterpret Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    You don't want to be a woman? :10500:
     
  4. Angela22

    Angela22 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I don't find it difficult on my part, no. Being a friend shouldn't be so difficult for any, I believe, but so many would rather back stab and hurt another because they, themselves, have experienced such pain.

    Sometimes when they can't have revenge on the one that caused them pain, they'd rather gain the trust of another, just to shatter it so they'd know what it's like to be in control of another's feelings.

    I know why some women do this, and certain things done are not unforgivable; I would hope that many, though, could see what hurt they cause and show some compassion rather than feel justified by doing harm to their sister.
     
  5. skuderjaymes

    skuderjaymes Contextualizer Synthesizer MEMBER

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    Exactly. But do you see how your zooming in on the reality halts the "general" conversation? Western Conversational etiquette almost demands that we generalize everything and speak in these large swaths and make these giant leaps.. (it is afterall the language of empire..) and then folk take the conclusions from these gargantuan movements of time and space and apply/ascribe them to the motivations and actions and intentions of the individual.. as if that has anything to do with this.. and vice versa.. it's a process so inexact as to be completely useless for anything other than communal chit-chat.. or outright lying. In a social context.. You are you.. not "black women".. or "women".. or even "people".. just plain ole you.
     
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