- Nov 2, 2009
- 8,801
- 5,870
- Occupation
- independent thoughtist thinker, context linker
The thing is "settling down" was never a concern of mine. In this thread, "settling down" was not the issue I was trying to address in any form. But, since you brought it up, I will give you my 2 cents on the issue.
Of course, women who have never been married are probably more vested in settling down than men, but women who have been married and divorced, aren't so thirsty, when it comes to "settling down", imo.
The reason, imo, is because they don't have as much to gain as their male counter parts. Especially, if they don't want to have more children. That's not saying they don't NEED men. They most likely want to have a "life partner", but don't require the label of marriage, they don't need a man to "make an honest woman outta them. Men may need women to take care of them.....cook for them, clean for them, run their household, etc. But, a professional woman, needs the comfort of a man, but can hire men to do manly work as needed. So, what a woman needs a man for is not the pragmatic things at all. She is looking for LOVE. Settling, just ain't enough.
Say a man makes $45,000 and his wife makes $45,001 per year. Every morning she gets up and makes breakfast for the whole family, washes the dishes, drops the kids off at school, and goes to work, Dad goes to work too. In the evening Mom picks the kids up from school. When she gets home, Dad is already there. He is watching the Basketball game. Mom throws 4 loads of clothes in the washer, cooks dinner, and supervises the children on their homework, follow-ups on any notices from school, etc., serves dinner, washes dishes, tidies up the house, and prepared for work the next day.
Dad is the traditional Father. He works, he brings home the bacon, he takes out the trash, takes care of the lawn, the vehicles, etc.
But, Mom, is both the traditional Mother, and the Modern Mother. She works 40 hours a week, she brings home the bacon. But, she also does everything a traditional wife does. She takes care of the children. She cooks and cleans. She is responsible for the home and the bills. She takes it in stride, though it is a thankless job, to do so much.
If the marriage ends in divorce, she probably won't see the point in "settling down" ever again.
never knew commitment and family was about numbers and percentages. Recognize that when you look at life through numbers, you limit the possibilities along the axis of mathematical logic. There is a lot more to a family than the number of hours worked, the income brought home and who does the laundry.