Black Poetry : Altered Fates

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by watzinaname, Aug 4, 2007.

  1. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2003
    Messages:
    16,340
    Likes Received:
    114
    Location:
    Northeast
    Ratings:
    +122
    Looking forward to a new day
    I awaited the sunrise
    But it wasn't the sun, but the moon
    that lit the daytime skies

    Perplexed, I jumped high to reach the sky
    but instead I touched the street
    I crouched down to think on this,
    and saw stars twinkling under my feet

    I gazed deep into the eyes of
    a young child to admire their purity
    I didn't find innocence there, I found
    the sage wisdom of advanced maturity

    I believe I've entered an alternate reality
    But I don't know how I got there...

    I tried to move forward
    one foot after the other, walking
    I ended up going in reverse
    almost forgotten people and places, stalking

    Thoughts that weighed heavy in the past
    Now weigh even heavier on my mind
    When the going gets rough do I get tougher?
    Or is it just a case of hard head, soft behind?

    Get thee behind me confusion
    I'm using my third eye to see more clearly
    But even that eye is near sighted
    and can't see the future with clarity

    I believe I've entered an alternate reality
    But I don't know how I got there
    It's an upside down, inside out world
    Where most things aren't really as they appear
    Gee, tell me, have you ever been here?
     
  2. GHETTOAMBITION

    GHETTOAMBITION Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Mar 18, 2006
    Messages:
    622
    Likes Received:
    7
    Ratings:
    +7
    wow.. this was a good poem
    and yes i have been there
    keep doing ur thang
     
  3. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2001
    Messages:
    69,983
    Likes Received:
    3,978
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    BUSINESS owner
    Location:
    Da~WINDY*CITY //CHICAGO
    Ratings:
    +4,178
    whoaaaa! this piece took me to that place as my mind wondered
    inside deep i love how you did this one
     
  4. Phenomenon

    Phenomenon Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2005
    Messages:
    212
    Likes Received:
    10
    Occupation:
    Student
    Location:
    Texas
    Ratings:
    +10
    A beautiful universe in one poem. I felt each and every stanza.
     
  5. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2003
    Messages:
    16,340
    Likes Received:
    114
    Location:
    Northeast
    Ratings:
    +122
    Hope you didn't have to stay in it for long, Ghettoambition, thank you so very much.
    Thank you for looking deeply into it Rich, very much appreciated.
    You humble me with your response Phenomenon. Thank you for saying that you felt so much from my words.
     
  6. HODEE

    HODEE Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2003
    Messages:
    4,912
    Likes Received:
    613
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    (RF) Technician
    Location:
    ( Alonewolf ) California.. by way of the LOU
    Ratings:
    +795
    Things aren't what they should be, things aren't what they seem. I can relate.

    This a geat flow Watz.
     
  7. Sha'iyn

    Sha'iyn Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    May 9, 2007
    Messages:
    402
    Likes Received:
    8
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    construction
    Location:
    i live in TushKauLoosa Ali Baba or Tuscaloosa, Ala
    Ratings:
    +9
    i'm there now

    i like this one a lot.

    time seems to move according to your thoughts and emotions.

    love seems to govern everyone else around you.

    you are under so many laws that you yearn the day you are sovereign.

    your soul speaks to you quietly and your spirit yells, "Jump!" and your mind says, "How High?, Why?, When?"

    your body involuntarily moves as if guided by the moon.

    you cannot see your eyes but, others can and look at you in amazement.

    you look at them the same way. Smile you are on Earth, enjoy your stay!
     
  8. 1poetsought

    1poetsought Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2003
    Messages:
    6,642
    Likes Received:
    541
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Poet
    Location:
    The Lone-Star State
    Ratings:
    +606
    Watz, no one opens a portal quite like you.

    Your charismatic gift... the Pied Piper of poetry.
     
  9. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2003
    Messages:
    16,340
    Likes Received:
    114
    Location:
    Northeast
    Ratings:
    +122
    Sorry thst you're having that uncertain feeling too Hodee. Thank you brother.
    You're experiencing this as well Sha'iyn? Sometimes I feel more alien than others. I appreciated your response poet, thank you.
    So humbled by you I am, 1poet. Happy you feel that I am capable of opening such a portal.
     
  10. Da Street So'ja

    Da Street So'ja Banned MEMBER

    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2001
    Messages:
    7,648
    Likes Received:
    40
    Occupation:
    thrivin' spiritually/physically/emotionally/financ
    Location:
    where failure is not an option
    Ratings:
    +42
    trust me it's not you

    it's this place

    this place that is under control of a piece of paper

    and there in lies the altered fate

    great piece

    again

    Watz
     
Loading...