Black Poetry : All is Changed

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by Awriter'ssoul, Dec 30, 2004.

  1. Awriter'ssoul

    Awriter'ssoul Member MEMBER

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    Sunlight blinds me,
    Water dehydrates me,
    Food starves me,
    I'm dying from life's breath.
    Skies once of blue, now of gloom
    Birds song, only pain's my ears.
    Laughter tears my eyes,
    sounds of happiness makes me sigh,
    only good in the bye,
    company makes me lonely.
    Oceans waves sunlight rest upon it's waters
    beauty, but now I only see the beast,
    the waves bring me fear shall they crash into me.
    Touch I cannot feel,
    eyes of warmness
    only makes me cold,
    sincerity only
    make's me suspicious,
    and with this I now contend.
    Gestures to comfort,
    only makes me uneasy,
    a call from another only
    makes me long to hear he.
    In bed I lie restless,
    darkness engulfs the room,
    I become content,
    the night becomes apart
    of me, I fade into it.
    Please do not bring
    daylight, if in these hours
    I find sleep,
    let sleep have my life.
    You are gone, a promise
    to never return, I drift
    into another world were all is opposite.
    All of life's pleasure,
    only sickens me now,
    all it's joys
    only remind me............
    torn into two
    hating now forever what I loved with you.
     
  2. gempis

    gempis Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    incredibly tight flow

    Lawd this is heart wrenching. I feel bad sayin how much I love and enjoy it. I hope you drop more flows, cause every line of this is just art.
     
  3. tashatoya

    tashatoya Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    This Piece...

    Conveys so much thought and feeling. Wonderful job poet, keep em' coming. This piece is so beautiful yet sorrowful so it's kinda bittersweet. I loved it!
     
  4. Akilah

    Akilah Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    lawd hammercy...

    Whewwww...I'm feeling the mind numbingly exquisite, consciousness altering PAIN in this peice...I been "there" before... you posed this so precisely and so realistically... and God knows when I was going through "it", this was EXACTLY how I felt...Like you scribed, even bird song was unbearable :bawling: But...it got better

    Thank you so much for sharing this with us,

    Much...
    Peace & Love
    Akilah :spinstar:
     
  5. queentswana

    queentswana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Hi awriter's soul
    It's quite a pleasure to have you...enter our world.
    There's something good in everything ...yes, even "Pain" ...as long as we can sometimes feel the pain, we must also know that the heart is working properly...and with every beat...it moves and churns into something better.
    We all may and do except pain...
    ...but we don't have to entertain it.
    that was such a beautiful piece you laided before us...writing from the "soul" is very deep.
     
  6. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    You conveyed the pain of heartbreak so well, I could almost feel it. The bitter seeping out from where it used to be sweet. This was an awesome write poet. Welcome to Destee. I can't wait to read more from you.
     
  7. HODEE

    HODEE Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Welcome to Destee

    All is Changed is a powerful piece. Flipped elements and feelings all portrayed perfectly. When love is gone, all that is left is " only good in the bye "
     
  8. MzBlkAngel

    MzBlkAngel Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Welcome to destee.com
    this flow was very emotional
    deep and very sad...but it was awesome flowing
    for i could feel your words....

    come share with us in voice chat as well
    www.destee.com/chat


    Peace
    Angel
     
  9. Awriter'ssoul

    Awriter'ssoul Member MEMBER

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    Thank you all for your comments.
    I'm happy to be apart of the destee family,
    and look forward to reading your poems
    as well.
     
  10. angelicsage

    angelicsage Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    After standing beneath this poignantly written, melancholic stricken, display
    of poetry at its best...I am inclined to say that your name is quite befitting...
    because every line and stanza...poured directly from the soul, like fire...
    pain on fire...
    I loved the originality and well conveyed feeling of sinking...into an abyss of sadness
    and even fading...into an eclipse of darkness without his love...

    *Bravo*

    Consider me...
    Officially Impressed
    Sage
     
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