Black Relationships : Adultery Anyone?

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by river, May 11, 2005.

  1. river

    river Watch Her Flow MEMBER

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    My Sunday school teacher, attempting to warn us against the pitfalls of adultery, told us about a man who was cheating on his wife. When his wife left him and he wanted to marry his mistress she said no because if he cheated on his wife he will cheat on her too.

    I know this was supposed to be somekind of poetic justice against the man. But when I think about it the mistress was being very dishonest. I have my thoughts about it but I'd like to hear from ya'll. What's your opinion?
     
  2. Radical Faith

    Radical Faith Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Hi sister River. I'm glad to see you are still running the race. Adultery is one of those sins that go hand in hand with fornication. Adultery is a tricky sin as well. When most people think of adultery they think of physical adultery but a person can committ adultery in their heart. "Well that doesn't count," some might say but think about it like this, if a person lusts and desires someone in their heart long enough the opportunity to committ adultery will present itself and they will act. The flesh yearns and longs to fulfill desires of the heart. Thats when we get in trouble. Especially if you're married. The unwed person participating in the affair is committing fornication. If men and women stop committing fornication then the likelihood of adultery would decrease in two ways. One the adulterer would have no one too cheat with and two men and women willing to wait until marriage before having sex are already on the same accord with moral values. Adultery is devastating sin the ruins a persons life and others involved such as spouses and children for a long time. Don't believe me look at Kobe Bryant. Fornication destroys families before they start and adultery destroys families in progress.


    Peace & Blessings Sister......
     
  3. karmashines

    karmashines Banned MEMBER

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    People tend to commit adultery because they are getting emotional and/or sexual satisfaction not present in their marriage. This of course applies to couples who originally loved each other in the first place. If someone is married to a 'playa', then there should be no surprise when the person cheats.

    The best thing to help try to avoid the temptation of cheating is to: 1) be open and honest with your partner, 2) do things to spice up the marriage.
     
  4. river

    river Watch Her Flow MEMBER

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    Thanks Radical and Karma.

    What about the response of the mistress. Do you think she was dishonest or wrong for judging the man? We know adultery is wrong in the first place but now that all is said and done how should she have responded to him?
     
  5. kente417mojo

    kente417mojo Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    He got what he deserved. No one has to be honest and fair with him because he's the one that deceived his wife. Why feel compelled to tell a liar the truth? He knew this woman could not be trusted because she was sleeping with a married man. How dumb is this dude?
     
  6. Radical Faith

    Radical Faith Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    This is the usual result for an unfaithful man. This women was wrong in the first place by having the affair. Like I said if it was love she would have waited until the man divorced his wife and married her before they had sex. She was using him. Her intentions was to never marry the man. You can believe she wasn't sexing him for free. She was getting more than companionship, which means she was probably getting her bills paid too. This man was stupid to say the least. One thing that can be said about all women is that no woman wants to play second fiddle to another woman. It may start out that way but sooner or later the mistress will up the stakes if the man wants to continue the affair. For the women it wasn't about sex or love or companionship, it was about manipulation and control. See as long as the man was married and desired sex from the woman, she could control the situation. Once he was free to be with her there was no more control or leverage for the woman. So she did what would be expected and reject the man's advances. So as we see it take two to tango and the only victum here was the wife and family of the married man. I'm sure she wasn't a victum for long but this is a clear case of the another black family going down in defeat...


    Peace....
     
  7. LURK

    LURK Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    OK...I have never been married,but this has happened to me in a serious committed relationship......i was with a woman for 3 yrs ,never cheated 1nce,until the last year...met someone who sparked my interest more and was more lively,passionate....i went on to have a relationship with her,while still ina relationship with my partner....i was most definatley dettached tho....as she was too...it came to light(i wont get into details) that i was in fact cheating(after several confrontationsmand me denying i was cheating).....and she eventually wanted ti no longer be with me....so ,i did the excact same thing this cat in ya professors story did.....i told the other woman that i wanted to be in serious,commited relationship with her....she eventually responded by saying she was willing to keep it sexual still,but not be commited cause she didnt trust me....for the simple fact that i cheated on my lover with her.........sounds conflicted and weird,i know,but it was the truth.........i didnt deserve any other answer............i didnt understand at first ,but when the tables turned that same year i grew to undertsand why....i was now the subject of being 'that guy'.....and when the woman wanted to have a serious realtionship with me after tellin her husband that she was cheating...i sed 'no'...in the end i realized it was all about the passion and ,sex.....as nieve as that may seem......it was true for my situation....i couldnt trust them ,and they for sure couldnt trust me.....im glad i went thru it cause now i know how to who and how to trust a lil better now,especially regarding the situations i may be in..........


    ok i typed enough...sorry just though i add a lil sumthin sumthin from a guyz point of view
     
  8. river

    river Watch Her Flow MEMBER

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    Hey Lurk,

    We live and learn. Got to give you the props for that cuz every cat don't learn from life.
    ^5
     
  9. Akilah

    Akilah Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    After these two experiences, would you knowingly involve yourself in an adulterous relationship again ?

    God's peace,
    Akilah :spinstar:
     
  10. Radical Faith

    Radical Faith Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Sister I believe no one want's to cheat on their partner but it is a spirit that possesses that person. This lustful demon makes a person need satisfied with their mate. This is one reason people never committ to there partner because the spirit is always looking for an opportunity to have something better. This is way people go from relationship to relationship with unsatisfactory results. Essence Magazine had a good article about men in multiple relationships. Until a person is rid of the spirit they will continue to be a slave to lustful desires and infidelity...


    Peace....
     
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