Black Poetry : A Trip Inside My Mind During My First Time...

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by LovelyGoldenOne, Apr 28, 2003.

  1. LovelyGoldenOne

    LovelyGoldenOne Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    silence...
    OH
    MY
    GOD
    i'm soooo nervous right now
    my lips are tremblin'
    what's my identity.....?
    baby please...
    don't stop this feelin'
    so many thoughts
    so many images
    in my mind are swirlin'
    your touchin' me with such assertiveness
    it doesn't even start to fade away this nervousness

    no.....
    no.....
    baby
    i don't want you to stop
    i just don't know how i should react
    i really wish i could tell you how i'm feelin' right now
    i try over and over to force the words
    ****...why won't they com out?
    i've got everything i wanna say inside my mind
    so why am i speechless at this time?

    no baby...
    i DO want you to stay
    i know my actions don't make it seem that way
    yeah...*smiling*
    you can keep doin' that
    see i told you that i love your assertiveness

    silence...
    oh
    my
    God
    i'm so So SO nervous
    baby...
    what you're doin' has got me past elated
    i gotta take deep breaths and talk this all in with peace ness
    i surrender to your every touch
    oh my...
    and to think i used to say you were a bit too much
    if only you knew what i was thinkin' right now...
    some way...
    some how...

    but anyway...
    oh...
    your finished?
    oops...i'm soooooo sorry
    i wasn't really concentratin' that first time
    well...*smiling*
    how about we start all over again?
     
  2. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    indeed getting in da motion
    feeling da notion to do it again
    dis tyme relax in
     
  3. LovelyGoldenOne

    LovelyGoldenOne Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    oh believe me rich i did that...i wrote this a while ago...just thought i should get some opinions on it...
     
  4. LovelyGoldenOne

    LovelyGoldenOne Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    i'd really like to know what ya'll think of this one..... :)
     
  5. LovelyGoldenOne

    LovelyGoldenOne Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    i like that miki...thats somethin' deep to think about...
     
  6. LovelyGoldenOne

    LovelyGoldenOne Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    i want some feedback on this one please...i'm tryin' to decide if i want to publish it or not...
     
  7. PurpleMoons

    PurpleMoons Administrator STAFF

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    sure sounds like the first time to me> you did a great job at capturing those thoughts. I say excellent!
     
  8. LovelyGoldenOne

    LovelyGoldenOne Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    thanks alot for ur input cindy....i'll take that into consideration :)
    and purplemoons...thanks for the compliments....
     
  9. LyrikalShe

    LyrikalShe Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Yeah...I remember those feelings. Great work here! :toast:

    Serenity...
    Brandi
     
  10. LovelyGoldenOne

    LovelyGoldenOne Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    yep i remember them all too well as u can see :)...thanks
     
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