Black Poetry : A Simple Note

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by watzinaname, Nov 18, 2003.

  1. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    It was as though her whole soul
    flowed onto that page.
    Although tinged with red,
    I was able to decipher the stage
    she had set for herself
    at such a young age.
    The set was a typical bathroom,
    except for the door,
    full length mirror shattered,
    too deliberate to ignore.
    The sink was pretty ordinary,
    but laying near the drain...
    an empty medicine bottle,
    contents used to ease the pain.
    The tub was pretty basic,
    nearly filled to over flowing.
    Too tired to pull her body out,
    I had no way of knowing.
    And then there was the note
    laying soggy on the floor.
    It said the simplest thing of all:
    I just don't want to live any more.
     
  2. MzBlkAngel

    MzBlkAngel Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    wow..dis like a scene out of movie...
    :angel1:
     
  3. MsGhettoPoet

    MsGhettoPoet Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    i agree with mzblkangel, like it belongs on film.........its deep, but its real at the same time. keep writting......:)
     
  4. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Art sometimes tragically imitates life. It started out in my mind just thinking about raw emotion being written down, and, well, this is what it turned into. Always nice to get feedback from you, Mzblkangel.
     
  5. Bluewater

    Bluewater Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    a simple note
    was all that was left
    the simple note
    that simple note
    my heart rest heavy
    on this scribe
    much love to you
    Peace
     
  6. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Trying my best to keep it real. Thanks, MsGhettopoet.
     
  7. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Glad my words had an impact upon you. Thanks Bluewater.
     
  8. MzBlkAngel

    MzBlkAngel Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    ahhh thank you for the comment...i love reading you..
    this is really nice wow :angel1:
     
  9. angelicsage

    angelicsage Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    this was an interesting journey...
    I found myself anxious to get to the ending
    this was exceptionally crafted
    with an air of mystery and reality


    Very emotive...and well written!
     
  10. gempis

    gempis Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I agree with angelicsage, watzinaname, this is very very well posed. Very tight!
     
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