Black Relationships : A Man Hits a Woman and vice versa

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by legit-writer, Aug 3, 2009.

  1. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Dec 12, 2002
    Messages:
    1,538
    Likes Received:
    1,175
    Gender:
    Female
    Ratings:
    +1,189
    me and one of my friends was talking about different things and somehow we got on the subject of a one hitting the other. he ended up telling me that he wouldn't beat on his girlfriend, but hypothetically if she was to slap him in the face, then he will most likely hit her back. He went on to say that she can hit him anywhere else if she gets mad, but it's just something about him getting slapped in the face that he wouldn't tolerate. Then he was going on to say that women can be abusive too just like men because he watched his stepmother hit on his dad like that... so for the guys...how you feel about it? would you hit a woman back if she hit you? and ladies, would you stay with a man if he told you that he would hit a woman ONLY if you put your hands on him first?? Also why or why not? as far as my answer, I don't do violence anyways, so part of me has nothing to worry about but you never know... so spill it!
     
  2. Khasm13

    Khasm13 STAFF STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 26, 2003
    Messages:
    10,784
    Likes Received:
    4,235
    Gender:
    Male
    Ratings:
    +4,472
    yet another divisive thread....

    one love
    khasm
     
  3. CITIZEN

    CITIZEN Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Jul 26, 2009
    Messages:
    308
    Likes Received:
    144
    Ratings:
    +144
    IMHO:

    There are two categories here:

    1 - Partner abuse/domestic violence. Ike and Tina. Women beat on men too.

    2 - Sometimes chit gets outta hand. A fight can break out between 2 guys, 2 women, or a man and a woman. I think a man should restrain the woman from hitting him. If she persists, then he should protect himself. He doesn't need to beat her down to do that. Females should not think that they can hit a man just because "a man can't hit a woman back." If you can't take it, don't dish it out.
     
  4. Keita Kenyatta

    Keita Kenyatta going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2004
    Messages:
    5,642
    Likes Received:
    3,328
    Gender:
    Male
    Ratings:
    +3,382
    I agree that this is yet another divisive thread. It is said that "violence begins where communication ends"....so it is not an issue of male or female because both can potentially hurt you both inside and out.
     
  5. WARRIOR

    WARRIOR BAMN - By Any Means Necessary PREMIUM MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2009
    Messages:
    850
    Likes Received:
    275
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    RETIRED
    Location:
    STRONG ISLAND , NY
    Ratings:
    +298
    MY FATHER TOLD ME THAT IF A WOMAN MAKES YOU MAD ENOUGH TO EVEN WANT TO HIT HER , THEN IT'S TIME TO PREPARE FOR DEPARTURE FROM THAT RELATIONSHIP....

    AND ON TWO OCCASIONS....I DID WALK AWAY....NEITHER ONE I DON'T REGRET..... PEACE FOUND ME BEFORE I COULD FIND IT.....

    I'M FORCED TO AGREE WITH BROS. KHASM & KEITA.......THIS IS A DIVISIVE TOPIC....THOUGH I DON'T MIND TESTIFYING


    WARRIOR
     
  6. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2001
    Messages:
    34,792
    Likes Received:
    8,985
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    betwixt and between
    Ratings:
    +9,686
    Great thread Sister! :)

    I'm like you, I try to stay away from violent situations.

    I think it's foolish and possibly injurious for anyone (male or female) to hit someone, and not expect to get hit back.

    Would you stay with a man if he told you that he would hit a woman ONLY if you put your hands on him first??

    While I'd want him to say he'd never hit a woman, I must respect one's natural desire to defend themselves.

    Society has become so violent, with many children growing up inside homes with such, ultimately leading to desensitization and perpetuation.

    Everyone ... keep yourselves safe.

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  7. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2001
    Messages:
    34,792
    Likes Received:
    8,985
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    betwixt and between
    Ratings:
    +9,686
    If yall find the topic divisive, why not just pass it by, instead of possibly discouraging her queries?

    I think it's a great topic.

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  8. cherryblossom

    cherryblossom Banned MEMBER

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2009
    Messages:
    19,252
    Likes Received:
    5,505
    Gender:
    Female
    Ratings:
    +5,560

    I also don't "do violence." I have never hit a man and I pray one never hits me. If so, my personal rule is "If you hit me, you better kill me."

    However, a slap is very personally offensive. It is degrading and insulting to slap another. It connotes inferiority and subordination, saying to another, "You are less than me" kinda like spitting in someone's face.

    So, I can understand and relate to your friend's perspective.

    And if a woman hits a man first, she can't be indignant or angry that he hits her back.

    So, if I don't put my hands on him, he shouldn't put his hands on me; and everybody can walk away.

    If not, it aint gone turn out like he thought it was. lol
     
  9. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Dec 12, 2002
    Messages:
    1,538
    Likes Received:
    1,175
    Gender:
    Female
    Ratings:
    +1,189
    Wow, this thread is old. I forgot that a couple of people said on this thread that this is a divisive topic. I am not sure how it is divisive. I guess I will never know.
     
Loading...