I try to fill my life with momentary nothingness to avoid the truth.. Much of it is a numb blur which has cast a dark cloud on me..today is a rainy day...and if it rains again tomorrow...than everyday will be a rainy for me... it feels like I am stuck within myself trying to find the passsage down the right corridor down the ally. I cannot move foward yet behind me, all the bridges have been burnt. I am in a deep sense of nothingness that's deep inside me that won't let me forget who I once used to be. Its killing me slowly inside because I find no middle ground to just speak without the fear that I will not find someone to listen without prejudice. I don't even know what the words of this scribe are trying to say, perherps someone can read between these lines and tell me my inner future.....down by the wayside, up on the hilltop I want to shout and plead for redemption. Truly nothing is meaningful anymore once you've sold your soulf-for half price at that. Desparation is a truly sad thing...my sadness. lo'