Black Relationships : A bit of advice?

Angela22

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Feb 26, 2013
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I know I'm not a baby, but sometimes I still feel like I get tripped up on the easy stuff just for being too hopefully romantic.:rolleyes:

What I'd like to know, Sisters, is what's some advice you'd give your younger self about men to save yourself trouble and cut through all the nonsense? Some advice you believe would have helped get you right where you wanted with who you wanted just when you needed?



(Sisters answer only, please(that means you @Kemetstry (I MEAN IT! BUTT OUT!)))
 

Kemetstry

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I know I'm not a baby, but sometimes I still feel like I get tripped up on the easy stuff just for being too hopefully romantic.:rolleyes:

What I'd like to know, Sisters, is what's some advice you'd give your younger self about men to save yourself trouble and cut through all the nonsense? Some advice you believe would have helped get you right where you wanted with who you wanted just when you needed?



(Sisters answer only, please(that means you @Kemetstry (I MEAN IT! BUTT OUT!)))

Then you should have put this in the female only section :lol: :lol: :rofl: :rofl: :lol: :lol:



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Destee

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I know I'm not a baby, but sometimes I still feel like I get tripped up on the easy stuff just for being too hopefully romantic.:rolleyes:

What I'd like to know, Sisters, is what's some advice you'd give your younger self about men to save yourself trouble and cut through all the nonsense? Some advice you believe would have helped get you right where you wanted with who you wanted just when you needed?



(Sisters answer only, please(that means you @Kemetstry (I MEAN IT! BUTT OUT!)))


lol ... hahahahahaha ... you know telling him not to say something is like putting his name in the title and lovingly ushering him in ... :shame: ... :lol: ... you really wanted him to speak on this, I know it - 'cause you know he cannot help his self ... :love:

My advice would be that everyone make sure you see and have what you want in the relationship ... and that's with anyone, man or woman ... before getting too deep in it. Oftentimes, we will give all of our "bargaining chips" away, long before there is a meeting of the minds. Make sure you hold on to those things until you have what you want (or clear and convincing evidence they can and are willing to deliver). Even then, after getting a signed contract (in blood), you may have to take them to court to live up to their end of the bargain - but at least you have something to show the judge - why you bet everything on this one person. I think this is applicable for both men and women (and all types of engagements) - but women are often more likely to get heavily vested in the deal prior to their actually being a deal / contract ... :wink:

Most important of all though, is to come out of it with your own whole self, if it does not go all the way you want. So make sure you enjoy it everyday and don't remain too long beyond the time you are enjoying it. Some deals fall through, no biggie, but you cannot let it kill you. So in that regard, if you can walk away of your own volition, under your own power, not needing ambulatory assistance - knowing you enjoyed it all of the days, until you did not ... could possibly be considered a win ... :)

Love You Sweetie!

:heart:

Destee
 

Angela22

Well-Known Member
MEMBER
Feb 26, 2013
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knowing you enjoyed it all of the days, until you did not ... could possibly be considered a win
Thank you so much for all that wisdom, Sister @Destee.

you really wanted him to speak on this, I know it - 'cause you know he cannot help his self
I knew he'd see my thread and reply whether I wanted or not, so I thought I'd at least make it funny. :lol:

Thank you again. :love:
 

Kemetstry

going above and beyond
PREMIUM MEMBER
Feb 19, 2001
26,583
7,317
Detroit
Occupation
Chemist
lol ... hahahahahaha ... you know telling him not to say something is like putting his name in the title and lovingly ushering him in ... :shame: ... :lol: ... you really wanted him to speak on this, I know it - 'cause you know he cannot help his self ... :love:

My advice would be that everyone make sure you see and have what you want in the relationship ... and that's with anyone, man or woman ... before getting too deep in it. Oftentimes, we will give all of our "bargaining chips" away, long before there is a meeting of the minds. Make sure you hold on to those things until you have what you want (or clear and convincing evidence they can and are willing to deliver). Even then, after getting a signed contract (in blood), you may have to take them to court to live up to their end of the bargain - but at least you have something to show the judge - why you bet everything on this one person. I think this is applicable for both men and women (and all types of engagements) - but women are often more likely to get heavily vested in the deal prior to their actually being a deal / contract ... :wink:

Most important of all though, is to come out of it with your own whole self, if it does not go all the way you want. So make sure you enjoy it everyday and don't remain too long beyond the time you are enjoying it. Some deals fall through, no biggie, but you cannot let it kill you. So in that regard, if you can walk away of your own volition, under your own power, not needing ambulatory assistance - knowing you enjoyed it all of the days, until you did not ... could possibly be considered a win ... :)

Love You Sweetie!

:heart:

Destee

She did it so I could see it



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Feeling good today fam...just been reading a couple of books. I think Dennis Kimbro's "Daily Motivations for African American Success" is one of the best motivational books on the market. This book has motivation for each day of the year on each page and all of these relate to your own Blackness. No matter what you're experiencing there's something in that book you could draw from. ✊
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