Black Relationships : #1 Reason Women Pull Away From Relationships

[houston123]

Yes, that's the biggest one.. infidelity and showing slight interest or lack of communication skills.

 

[NyneElementz]

For me, if you don't include me in major decisions. You're boring in bed. You're mean and cheater.

Boring in bed can be cured, because that's more of an emtional thing than anything else. Studying a Kama Sutra book together is one way to treat that problem.

I agree that if a man and a woman are going to be together, she should be included in major decisions, but to get there with me, you have to be trustworthy, and by that, I mean not selfish, manipulative, or brat-ishly entitled in your mindset. If you're my best friend and my love and I can trust you to be about our collective benefit, I've got no problem with making you an equal voice in the relationship.

As far as being mean, that can go both ways. Many times we're accused of being mean when we aren't. Now if a brother is verbally, emotionally, physically, or mentally abusing you, then yeah, he's mean.

Cheating as a reason, I dig. But be sure you don't make it easy for me to go cheat before the temptation arises. I'm not saying that's an excuse, but you should realize that how you treat me has as much power as the way I treat you. If the relationship we have is strong, the communication is strong, the trust is strong, the encouragement I get from you is strong, and I know for certain you'll never do anything to tear me down, ain't no way I'm cheating. I can fight a horde of a million succubi with no problem. You cut me down with your words over a mistake, act childish with communication, become untrustworthy or treat me like I'm shady, etc., the strength of your negativity towards me determines how fast I fall.

 

[Hermetic]

Boring in bed can be cured, because that's more of an emtional thing than anything else. Studying a Kama Sutra book together is one way to treat that problem.

I agree that if a man and a woman are going to be together, she should be included in major decisions, but to get there with me, you have to be trustworthy, and by that, I mean not selfish, manipulative, or brat-ishly entitled in your mindset. If you're my best friend and my love and I can trust you to be about our collective benefit, I've got no problem with making you an equal voice in the relationship.

As far as being mean, that can go both ways. Many times we're accused of being mean when we aren't. Now if a brother is verbally, emotionally, physically, or mentally abusing you, then yeah, he's mean.

Cheating as a reason, I dig. But be sure you don't make it easy for me to go cheat before the temptation arises. I'm not saying that's an excuse, but you should realize that how you treat me has as much power as the way I treat you. If the relationship we have is strong, the communication is strong, the trust is strong, the encouragement I get from you is strong, and I know for certain you'll never do anything to tear me down, ain't no way I'm cheating. I can fight a horde of a million succubi with no problem. You cut me down with your words over a mistake, act childish with communication, become untrustworthy or treat me like I'm shady, etc., the strength of your negativity towards me determines how fast I fall.

I agree with everything you said above, but the last paragraph I made bold. I would leave the relationship, and then started my search for the right women for me. Cheating is not only disrespectful to your partner, but also to yourself. It also taints whatever relationship is created out of the cheating. So no, a woman doing all of those negative things would not make it easier for me to cheat, but instead would just make it easier for me to end the toxic relationship.

 

[Queenie]

I honestly don't know what the #1 reason is that women pull away from relationships. Whatever it is, I wonder if it's different for women of different races/cultures.

Is there something women have in common that is universal among them when it comes to love, respect, morals and values? I don't think so. Our mental and emotional development is shaped by our experiences, aren't they? Some would even add spiritual development to that list.

But I believe that things are relative I mean, I could say that I couldn't tolerate a person that lies, steals or is a murderer. But what if the lie was to protect me, or the stealing was done to feed a starving family, or a person lost their life because they were trying to harm me and my partner came to my defense? Would that drive me away under those circumstances? Probably not. Special circumstances should be considered. It's all relative.

A repeat offender--someone with a "dark" heart and a sick mind to go along with it--not only will I walk away (RUN!) from a relationship with a person like that, I would pray that I have the discernment to see those traits in a person and not be with them in the first place.

 

[NyneElementz]

I agree with everything you said above, but the last paragraph I made bold. I would leave the relationship, and then started my search for the right women for me. Cheating is not only disrespectful to your partner, but also to yourself. It also taints whatever relationship is created out of the cheating. So no, a woman doing all of those negative things would not make it easier for me to cheat, but instead would just make it easier for me to end the toxic relationship.

I think you misunderstood what I was saying. Cheating as a reason why you leave, I dig. I don't dig cheating.