The flip side
This is an issue that breaks me up inside because of the children I've worked with in the classroom, who were housed in lock-down placement facilities ~ as if they had committed crimes. The other side of the coin, the children who are separated from families because of these acts, is a sad consequence of incestuous, emotional, physical abuse. During my employment at one of Southern California's largest "children centers", I would walk the hallways when class wasn't in session, and find myself in the nursery. There would be scores of new infants, toddlers, sisters and brothers, either abused/neglected/abandoned and remanded into court custody while parent(s)/guardians/custodial adults were being charged/sentenced/rehabilitated.
I remember countless horror stories that still bring tears to my eyes. There was a six year old boy, whose father (an ordained minister) repeatedly assaulted him sexually. It is a disease of the worst kind, I believe. And, perpetrators have no idea how they affect/infect the lives of the innocent, forever. Many times, children begin to 'act out' sexually because of these abuses. They BECOME perpetrators against their brothers, sisters, smaller children, etc. The dysfunctional behavior is far-reaching in too many cases. All of my actual students in my equivalent 6th grade class had attorneys, social workers, childrens' advocates; 80% of them required special educational services due to learning disabilities due to their home environments...and of course, there were drug babies who would have certain challenges for life. 90% of the children had counselors/psychiatrists, and many of these chilren were on medications. The 10 - 20% who were so-called 'normal', would be the first (depending upon age ~ older children are always much harder to 'place') to go into group home environments, or to stable family member homes...or adopted outright.
But the separation from family takes its toll on all children in some way. Because everyone is different, we cannot predict who will thrive, survive, or stay alive.
And I did see death come to those who didn't make it a week after 'release'...especially if they 'aged out' at their 19th birthday.
I chose to foster a child from this experience; but we couldn't be 'together' until one of us left the facility. Once she was placed in a group home setting, I was able to aggressively 'fost-dopt' her. She became my oldest child ~ I was already a mother of 2 with one on the way. Her story is much like all the others; but she was the oldest of her siblings, and a survivor. It was because of her reporting the incidents of abuse, calling 911, that Childrens Services came in and rescued her and her siblings. She tells me there are memories that still haunt her ~ feelings that nag at her in the middle of sleepless nights. But her natural born will to live and succeed, and her belief that she was destined for something greater, sustained her. She is thriving now, married, with an intact family unit of her own. Her plans have always been to become a childrens' advocate/attorney, working on behalf of children and issues she's intimately familiar with.
This scourge of incest is not new in our society, nor in our 'family' as Blacks. And I agree that the demon must be exorcised, exposed, executed. Bringing people (male AND female, now, it's not always and only the men perpetrating) out, dealing with their deep-seated 'issues' through intensive-aggressive rehab/counseling; making them accountable for their PRESENT manifestations of whatever they went through 'back then', therefore not allowing them to blame whomever turned them out...is one way. AFTER prosecution and STIFF sentencing.
I'm for 'outting' the mental darkness that lurks behind closed doors, responsible for the 12-year old prostitutes, mommies, daddies, drug addicts, thieves, arsonists, gang bangers, murderers I've worked with in lock-down institutions.
A