I have just started posting on this forum so I won't complain about anyone. I'm not a complainer by nature anyway. We do have some extremely troubling issues going on in the community and I hope we can discuss them reasonably because they are going to have to be faced sooner or later. Right now, let me mention that respecting the diversity that has always been part of being black and in the diaspora will go a long way to resolving a lot of the negativity.
The majority of confusion on this site does not come from the responders of the post themselves per se, it comes from the poster without them knowing it. For example: When a person comes onto this site, nobody knows if they are married to white people or sleeping with them until the "poster gives that information up" which they should not do if they can not handle it...because who you are with is your own business. If a person is gay or lesbian, don't nobody on this site know that information until the posters themselves give that info up. All that stuff is personal and this is a social site. Black people should know black people by now and whatever there is that's personal in your life, leave it that way if you can not handle the energy of your personal life being exposed, ridiculed or critisized on social sites like this. That's just my take on it....what's yours? ( I know, that almost sounded like a television commercial, right?...
We are not going to be able to do anything substantial as a people if we can't handle the truth and if we don't practice respect for one another's differences. Why should people hide away important truths about their lives if it is a part of the discussion? It's some of the responders who can't deal with the "energy" of the reality of someone else's life, especially when that reality contradicts the insane prejudices they may have. Then they start throwing tantrums or repeating the same nonesense over and over like petulant children. Never think that if someone reveals a personal detail about his or her life during one of these dialouges that it is an invitation for you to act out and launch into personal attacks. Disagreements are fine. But if you don't want to be disrespected then don't disrespect others. Accept people for what they are, or if you can't do that, ignore them.
wll777 and Keita Kenyatta ... you both make good and reasonable points ... and it would be nice if it could all be packaged and managed as easily as you both present ... but that has not been my reality or experience over the years, when it comes to managing this community. First ... let me invite Brother wll777 to report any violations that you see. While it may not be your normal way of dealing with situations, in this environment it works and is encouraged. As a new Member it will help you learn what actually qualifies as a violation, as well as aiding in keeping down the disruption. Brother Keita ... you make a good point, but i'd not agree that the confusion on this site comes from one end of the conversation, moreso than the other. I'm of the opinion that all involved contribute to the confusion, and as a result, all involved are held responsible for it. There is very little found here that does not connect to someone's personal life and/or experience. To suggest that folk should leave such out, or expect to be ridiculed and criticized ... well ... that's not how we live here. It's difficult to find a perfect balance for all, but it's my job to try. The bottom line is that each Member will be held responsible for whatever contribution they make to any disruptions found here. It makes no difference to me, the manner in which you've contributed to the disruption, or how justified you feel. I have warned, suspended, and probably banned one or some from every spectrum along the way. You could be the one presenting your personal information, or the one attacking the person for presenting their stuff. If you're in it ... causing disruption in this community ... you'll get the consistency our management promises to deliver. The challenge is for each Member to manage their own interactions respectfully. If you can't do that ... no matter what end of the argument you are on ... you're probably not going to fare well. So ... while it's in your hands ... please handle it like you want to see it end ... because once i'm in it ... you lose that option. Love You! Destee
I have to agree with you. We can disagree without being disagreeable. We should be civil in our words..We do not know the persons here but our words reflect who we are.