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Black Relationships : Men who trap women with pregnancy?

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by Princess, Nov 11, 2004.

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  1.  
    Princess

    Princess Member MEMBER

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    What is it? Men who see a sista that is responsible, young, cute, no kids, single, has her own home & car, career and money. Why do brothers want to trap you up with a baby? I think this is a form of control because some men don't want to see you happy or without them. I had a couple of brothers who told me that, "he nevers wants me to leave his life", so doing sex i had to pay close attention to this cat, cuz he was (on purpose) trying to get me pregnant. So i broke off the relationship with him just because of me being scared of becoming a Baby Mama.

    This has happened to me more than 3 times now. What do you guys think?
     
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    jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    send me your phone number :slobber:
     
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    Princess

    Princess Member MEMBER

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    why do u want me to send my number? :grin:
     
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    $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Administrator STAFF

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    we may have a few but nore then none are not trying to lock a woman
    it had been and known the other way round how women lock men in
    by pregnancy ...but we all know this don't keep nobody together surely
    there are stats to state this by numbers , it must be some obsession or
    facts to just lay .

    Speaking for self i never go after a woman to make a baby for doing so
    bring forth child is more then that to me a woman worth is more then her
    prizes such as money/cars /house and such ......

    just some guys think this way to gain from another these are the one's
    who don't want to work
     
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    Princess

    Princess Member MEMBER

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    Well, i have the mental to go with it. I'm a conscious sistah!
    I have both parents in the household and I have high family values. I guess this is what they see. I would be a great mother. But i require the man to do his part as well. And i let my man know this. Do not make the baby if you can't give it Life! That's my principle.....
    Life meaning ALL: substance, knowledge, wisdom, understanding, respect, care, love etc....
     
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    kente417mojo

    kente417mojo Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I have never...ever ever ever ever ever heard of a man trying to trap a woman with pregnancy. Now, of course that doesn't mean that it doesn't happen, but it's not nearly as common as women trapping men. You have to be a sorry SOB to try to intentionally get a woman pregnant just so she won't leave you. I don't care how much a woman has going on, I would not ever think of tryin to knock her up. For what? She can still leave and still take the kid and get child support from you, so what sense does that make?
     
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    Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Hello Princess ... how can someone "trap" a grown person with pregnancy ... male or female? I think we must get beyond this "victim" mentality when we willingly take part in activities that could lead to the creation of a child. When you're taking your clothes off, and engaging in sexual relations ... willingly ... then any talk of being trapped must be thrown out of the window, because you know full well the possible consequences of such an act. You cannot leave it up to anyone else, be you male or female, to insure that your actions don't produce unwanted results.

    If you get pregnant, how can you say someone trapped you?

    I don't understand this.

    :heart:

    Destee
     
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    $$RICH$$

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    in respect for what u feel but men don't trap through pregnancy
    it's not that the man is doing he maybe after the royalities of glamor
    such as car/ money/house but by pregnancy .......i agree now after
    thinking how can a man trap you anyway into something you don't want ???
     
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    kente417mojo

    kente417mojo Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    1. Punching holes in a condom.

    2. Lying about taking you birth control pill

    3. Taking a condom out of the trash can and pouring the sperm inside after sex.

    A man can not trap a woman with pregnancy because with children a woman holds all the cards. A woman trapping a man is a totally different story. Even if a man successfully gets a woman pregnant she can always have an abortion. She doesn't even have to tell him. She can keep it secret, get an abortion and act like she was never pregnant. If she does have the baby there no guarantee that he'll get the kid. Like I said, there's no way to trap a woman and any man trying is an idiot.
     
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    Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Brother Kente ... i disagree. If you are aware of Nos. 1, 2, and 3 above (and all the other possible "traps" that could ensnare you) ... and you don't want to have a child ... then you always have the ultimate choice of not having sex. You give up that control when you engage in sexual relations, knowing that these things can happen. If they happen, you can't blame it on someone else. You made a decision to have sex, to partake in an act that could possibly, remotely, produce a child. How can you put the consequences of that act on the shoulders of another, when you knew full well going in (no pun intended), what the outcome could be?

    The fact that the female has complete control over the decision of having the baby, aborting it, etc., is no different. At some point (prior to putting your penis in her vagina), you had complete control over whether you created a child. You willingly relinquish that control once you put your penis in her vagina, and the child is conceived. If you know this, and still put your penis in, then you can't blame anyone but yourself for that.

    You weren't trapped, maybe careless, irresponsible, a host of other words ... but i don't think trapped is appropriate.

    :heart:

    Destee
     
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