No, I wasn't. My view of a man in my life was not framed from any White cultural influence but from my own environment and life experiences. I was reared by single women in my life. And the ruling tenet in my house was "God Bless The Child That's Got His/Her Own." In my formative community, I saw two-parent homes with physically and verbally abusive fathers, alcoholic fathers and drug-dealer fathers, etc.. As a young child, I remember looking at my friends/neighbors who had such fathers and thought if THAT was what having a father was, I was glad I didn't have one cuz we didn't have cussing and screaming and fighting and calling the police and running from abuse in my house. But my mother taught her daughters what a man will do who loves you and respects you and not to be ever dependent on a man, to "bring something to the table," and know that you can make it with him or without him cuz "love" don't pay the bills. I had no grandfathers or uncles to look to for guidance. So, my only immediate example of men were my brothers, and I did look up to them. The rest, I had to figure out on my own by trial and error. So, no, I never had the "Cinderella Complex" thinking a man was my "Prince Charming" or "Gallant Knight." But, as I matured I learned that all men are not what I saw as a child nor what my own father was.
You do realize that you have a rather,...how shall I put this?..., skewed view of men? That this view really hasnt left you. Because whent he going gets tough, we revert back to the familiar