Hello Everyone,

This is not an "anything goes" kind of place. We do have a "banned word list (http://destee.com/forums/showthread.php?t=10807)" on the forum, though it is short because I don't want to hinder anyone's creativity by taking legitimate words away from them (many words have several meanings and can be used in many ways).

For those that have been here awhile, you know that we're quite liberal when it comes to the use of swearing, cursing, etc. Oftentimes, a person needs to "*****," complain, get some things off their chest ... and only that word can express it properly.

If you've been in the family a while, posted a few peaces and given us the opportunity to see that your flow is a mature and conscious one ... we are going to be more lenient regarding your use of such words.

If you are new here and walk right in the door cursing, swearing, talking of dicks and pussies ... you are going to be warned and/or your peace edited.

I'm hoping, since we have such a mature crowd, that each one can monitor their own choice of words, keeping me from universally banning more of them.

For example, if you must use the word "dick" and/or "p-ussy," I'd much rather you choose their proper alternatives, i.e., penis and vagina ... if you are using them in that context.

We've not had a problem yet, just trying to stay on top of things (so we don't).

As always, if you have any questions or concerns you can post them here.

Thanks,

Destee

As I type this, I see that I've banned p-u-s-s-y and not dick! What's up with that??!! Hmmmm ...

you know I appreciate everything that proceeded from your throne in this reading of our Rights and Responsibilities, Queen. You da law.

My only statement is to your very last point.... see, p-u-s-s-y isn't a proper noun (you know, like Richard's nickname is).....I mean, what other reason could you have had for showing such a preference for dick? :D

:heart:

a

Ms. Alyce ... this is true and as I've pondered your help in solving this mystery ... hehehe ... my mind goes to the fact that dick is not an animal either and p-u-s-s-y is, which should have given her/it some extra consideration ... don't you think??!!! :D

I'm going to investigate this further, it was probably one of our Moderators that banned her/it. :wink:

Destee

is, upon further investigation of this situation, it might be possible that piece can be established with dick and the kitty cat happily cohabiting in da house ???? :D

.... I'm through now

a

I take it my one particular work has offended some of you and this page.
First let me tell you that there was no offense intended.
In fact, if you read the piece with understanding you will find that there is actually a message to some of the brothers who feel that woman are just playtoys.
Ms. Destee, you make the statement that certain words can be used in a particular content. In fact, when this piece was orginally written, I was being barraged by five men who were trying to get angry by insinuating that all black women were money hungry and only would deal with a black man if he had lots of money and a good car. While they were throwing all this nonsense at me, I choose to write my anger down on paper while they were talking. Now if this clears up the matter as why I chose certain words, that is the story. Now again, if this type of piece is offensive to you and your page, I will only send the ones that are mellow. For the record, if you receive works that are offensive, you should write to the offending party in private to straighten the matter out immediately. I also have a website and my site is called controversywriters.com. I am in the process of completing and all my works are on there as well as other controversial pieces by others. Maybe this site would be more in the liking of others who may write pieces such as this. However, I am not condoning going off the hook either.
I use words as a painter uses a brush. Just as there is visual art that offends others, therefore there will be written pieces that will offend others as well. Please accept any apologies and I will continue to push this site to others.

Thank you.

Ryss ... no, I was not speaking to any one peace. As administrator of this forum, I have to look further than today ... trying with all my might to see tomorrow ... based on all of our yesterdays. Taking into consideration the ebb and flow of all things within our community. No one said anything to me about your peace, please don't think that.

This forum has been up for a year and I just put up our forum rules (http://www.destee.com/forums/rules.php) this week. I'm saying this to say, we are not about rules, fences or obstacles keeping us from being us. All of those rules have come as a result of us growing into them, just like this new "rule" has. Everything and everyone is welcome and I understand completely the sensuality of a poet. The last thing I want to do is hinder that. But at the same time, I'm responsible to my own vision/dream and the level of comfort and quality of all. I'm always trying to balance it, weigh out what I think is best for the community at large, while taking into consideration each individual ... it's not always an easy thing to do ... but I'm trying.

The note above is not the first of its kind and it was not your peace that prompted me to write it. There have been a series of peaces that I've read (over a number of months) that has lead me to believe it's time that I address this. Unless it is something that cannot be ignored, I'm usually very slow to act.

If I don't let the family know what is expected/wanted, there will be no way for them to adhere to that. I'm really just communicating.

I remember a young man that joined us some time ago that used profanity in his first peace (and title). I asked him to enter this house as he would anyone's that he had respect for. In most cases, we would not walk into someone's home cursing and swearing. I think it's all about respect for where you are and the company you're in (not to mention one's own self-respect).

Ryss, I will never ask you to explain why you wrote a peace or where you were (mentally) when you wrote it. I will simply be grateful that you shared a part of yourself with me and absorb all that I can from it.

Again, just wanting to establish an understanding between the administration and those who frequent here. There's nothing like an understanding.

Please do stay and continue to share and invite others to join us. You and they will be treated with much respect and hospitality, as all are who enter here.

Destee

Alyce ... is dick wearing Kodiak work boots?!

if not ... we may be able to do this!

:)

...from what I understand dick don't roll like that...

ok, I'm really through now... handle it


a

Alyce ... it does look like some gender discrimination is going on up in here ... the more i think about this ... (and thinking of all the work Hunter has done/shared w/the Vagina Chronicles) ... I would be the last person discriminating against kitty ... ooohh gosh ... i'm thinking that I was protecting her from being abused ... thinking dick could handle himself out here in the world ... wow ... is this 3rd world thinking or what!

Alyce ... are you suggesting that i let kitty out ??!! free to roam this forum as she pleases ???!! :eeek: Will people abuse her??!!!

:::signed::::

keeper of the kitty

da BiZ-ag.... nothing like a cooped up kitty, Destee...you KNOW thissssssss ....

And why should we discriminiZate?... what's good for dick is beneficial to the Kat! And heck if I can 'splain why it must be like....dat....

Now that you have the facts, you MUST STOP THIS INJUSTICE Destee.... Let the Kitty loose! You know she can hold it down....


I'm really really through this time...

a

Here I started a thread threatening to ban more words and I end up letting kitty out ... oohhh Lawwd ... okay ... to those who are listening ... BE WARNED ... i will be watching closely how kitty is treated up in here ... i have been born to be a keeper of the kitty and it's my duty to protect her ... look out for her ... and yes ... make sure that she gets some much needed exercise every now and then ... so i am going to let her out ... but i will be watching!

Richard ... mind your manners ... :)

Yall know what ... as I looked at that short list of banned words ... i thought ... hmmmm ... we are all adults, why do i have to ban any words? something must have happened / been said to make me ban them before ... but anyway ... now that kitty is all free and stuff ... i'm feeling so much better! :)

i've taken all words off the ban list!

We really are a great group of folk here. Everyone respecting everyone and everything ... we never have any problems ... I think we can handle this.

Of course if I see a need we'll go back to the banned word days.

Wow ... who woooda thunk it?!

Destee

here we go, here we go!!!....good thing I'm a reformed freakazoid. (I regularly attend my FA meetings and I've been clean and proper for about 2 weeks now....)

Thank you for this. I had no problem with the way things were...but there are times when prose and poetry flow best punctuated/articulated/aliterated in the vernacular... especially those of the hard-hitting, nitty-gritty spoken word variety. Make your short hairs uncurl.....

(almost had a relapse) I'm done....

a

My pleasure Alyce. As I think about it, just having to watch and make sure that no one got carried away was a chore ... having this feature makes my job (and the Moderators) a little easier.

But we've grown, matured ... established ourselves as a high quality discussion forum with conscious individuals, that can handle these words. If I'm wrong, we'll go back to the old days
of banned words.

Please note that my original message above still stands as is.

Destee

*hoping that the Moderators are okay w/this* < eeek >

it's fine wit me !!!:)

well now lets see what happens. Ms. A you sure you reformed :x: ? I had to drop outta ma FA meetins.... kept thankin bout....


One

as word play move about and make sure kitty don't get hurt
by d!@k or tussie:)

you mean to tell me, I can't say @#**&% #$!&^&&&#$ !!!!!!!
no more? AWwwwww...sister you're cold

:laugh:

that's jus' jokes...that's cool.

blak

mmmmm of course Bishop is down with the decision to let the Cat ROAM FREE!!! She can handle the dog!!! I feel an Xtreme Flow coming on......Family are you ready?

It seems that the Moderators are okay with this (yall were suppose to fight me on this one!)

I would like to remind everyone that you have no such things as Free Speech rights when it comes to privately owned forums and businesses.

Many people interpret the First Amendment and other Free Speech laws to mean they can say whatever they want, whenever they want to say it. When in fact they only protect that speech in public government run venues.

In forums such as these, the owners and administration has the final say in what is allowed and what isn't.

Please understand that destee.com is a business web site. Many of my decisions regarding this forum take into account this fact, as they share the same domain. As I see the flurry of use, of previously banned words, my regret regarding this decision is growing.

I would appreciate if you would keep in mind that this is my business and all things that happen here (on destee.com) are a direct reflection of it. While it is my desire to provide a place for us to express ourselves, it will not be at the cost of my business appearing any less than the high quality, professional service that it is.

We'll see how it goes.

Destee

I don't have an opinion either way about banning or not banning certain words. Granted, anything can be taken too far and even though we're adults, we should exercise some common sense and respect. Destee, this is your place of business and I respect that very much. I use cuss words very sporadically and only to reinforce the mood I'm trying to portray. However, I don't understand why some words are represented by astericks in certain places and not others. If the words **** and ***** are going to show up on the title page, then why are they censored within the poem itself? ( And this goes for certain cuss words as well)

I'm sorry yall, I thought I could take it, but I can't.

The ban on the following words is back on:

**** **** ***** ****** **** ****

So there won't be any discrimination regarding **** and ***** ...
they are both on the ban list now.

Anyone who has a forum that allows any and every type of
conversation and dialogue, I commend you and wish you much
success with it.

If anyone would like for me to design, develop and/or manage
a site for them that allows such, contact me. :wink:

Destee

Danilyn ... the reason those titles are displaying those words is because they were unbanned at first, then banned ... and once the ban was put back on, it didn't include the title. I'm going to manually adjust them now.

Destee

Come on Destee.... don't go 'Sybil" on us with multiple personalities!

Are you unleashing the ban or are we censoring creativity?!

:confused: :confused: :confused: :o :o :( :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

o my

pd

I think I'll sit back and wait for the final answer.:eek: :x:

N2 ... I tried to be "word banless" but as I browsed the forum and saw titles that had "Finger F-ucking" and "P-ussy" in them, I really couldn't take it.

While I'd love to be able to accomodate everyone and their individual desires to say whatever they please, I tried, but can't.

The ban is back on.

Destee

For the record ... creativity is no more censored now than it was 24 hours ago.

Destee

... and PoeticDelight ... don't be laff'n ...

:)

Destee i see thatyou have ***** for the word **** in my piece "MY Man ****" Nothing personal but I would like to delete the poem in its entiriety. However I am not able to do so...please help

I'll do it for you Heartbeat

Thank you Deste. Let me say for the record that you are correct about the relationship between freedom of speech and private businesses and forums. I will always support and respect what you wish to do with your business. However my decision to take "My Man ****" off the forum is a personal choice about how I fel about my work. I am not making a statement of protest as it may seem to appear. I thank God every day for this place so please don't take my request personally.

BE

Heartbeat, of course I don't take your request personally. You have given me your support long before this forum existed, and I thank you for that.

----------

I hope everyone understands that it simply isn't possible for one forum to satisfy the needs and desires of everyone. Due to my choice to ban the following words:

nigge* **** puss* cli* cun* and dic*

some will feel that their creativity is stunted because these words are not displayed in their entirety. There will be others that feel comfortable browsing this forum, perhaps even encouraging their children to partake of the wisdom found here.

While it is difficult to find that happy medium, it's my job to try and do.

It's been suggested that many of the poets are upset with this censorship, but it's no different now (other than the addition of the word dic*) than it was yesterday.

You all know that I'm open to workable solutions and very flexible. This issue ultimately comes down to satisfying myself regarding the integrity and wholesomeness of this forum ... or satisfying everyone else's desire to be able to say whatever they please. If you have suggestions on how both can be achieved, I'd love to hear them.

Destee

Destee you have been on a rollercoaster today, haven't you. Well, after seeing the list of "banned" words... like you said before: we are "no more censored now than we were 24 hours ago." Who said we had to post every little thing that we write anyway. I think that the fam understands and that everyone will support your decision. (I never even knew we had a list of forbidden words... see how uncensored the house is...) Thank you for all your hard work and a place to call home.

MsB

Thanks again Destee for everything! I love the site and I love you too!

Nothin' but love for ya' sistah..... I know that the ban doesn't really affect my flow one way or another.... you know I'm still down for whateva ma.... sistah I'm here for the long haul! :)



It's all love darlin' :D


N2

Yes MsBerry, whew, it certainly has been a ride, one which I brought on myself by trying to fix stuff that wasn't broke to begin with. Thank you for your show of support, it is much appreciated. :heart:

Danilyn ... Thank You Gurlie ... I love you back! :love:

N2 !!! Ohhhhh Gurl !!! I am sooooo glad to see this. Nothing troubles me as much as thinking my Moderators and I aren't together regarding policy. Now that we've got this behind us ... what is that Sybil talk ... :nuts: ... :wink: ... For true Sis, I appreciate you so much and can now move forward with the ease that we've had in all previous months. Thank You.

Afridancr ... it appears that the final answer has been given so I'm going to let this thread take its rightful place with the rest.

PoeticDelight ... please try to refrain from laughing while we are in the midst of a family crisis :nono:

Thank you all for the support and love given, especially when you think I could and/or should do things differently.

Much Love and Peace,

Destee

do whatever you feel, i know that it would result from a reasonable person as yourself.

i'm down with you from here to czechosylvokia :wink:

yo did i spell that right??

Now sistah you know your "Mod Squad" has got your back on any issues that come up! :) :uzi: There is no crisis, and never was....the fact of the matter is -- whatever you say goes!

Besides, the five of us take our issues to the back room to sort them through! We'd never have any arguments in front of the kids! :lol:

:nono:
Destee

:glasses:
Bishop

:grin:
Blakverb

:cool:
Kemet

:angel:
N2urSoul



Always :heart: sis'

You know I'm down wit it. There is so much great stuff in this place. There's no place quite like it. I don't think the lack of those five words, will limit our creativity...at least it hasn't bothered mine none :)

I believe you have found a happy medium where EVERYONE can be happy and even more challenged. If not...well...it hard to please all of us all of the time, but yet we remain true to the gang.
I'm a living witness to this fact. :D


Keep up the good work Sis.

Joyce

so it be written , so it be done !

in agreement wordz off da shelf
back in da box now i place it in da volt
where i'll be watching it so no one can
get it out ..........I'm in full support of destee:D

now dat's dat nuff said:toast:

Joyce ... Gurl !!! ... you know I was need'n you here on this one!!

:)

Thanks for the love and support.

$$RICH$$ ... as always ... :heart:

Destee

I see and dig.

Welcome Queen of Spades!!!! Good to have you here....looking to read some of your joints.......

Well, I am new here guys..just registered today...I have a few of my short stories I want to submit...They are what I call urban fiction....There is derogatory language b/c of conversation between characters...I don't want to offend anyone by posting...Should I send you guys a sample? Its not in anyway porn...just what fell off my brain.....Like I said I am new and do't want to over step any boundaries.

welcome Voice it should be o'k as u express if you use such
but not in it's entire content we only have a few words on the list
anyway it's how the wordz used

we are very happy to have you aboard the family
welcome to destee......
go on drop ya story

Hello Everyone,

This is not an "anything goes" kind of place. We do have a "banned word list (http://destee.com/forums/showthread.php?t=10807)" on the forum, though it is short because I don't want to hinder anyone's creativity by taking legitimate words away from them (many words have several meanings and can be used in many ways).

For those that have been here awhile, you know that we're quite liberal when it comes to the use of swearing, cursing, etc. Oftentimes, a person needs to "*****," complain, get some things off their chest ... and only that word can express it properly.

If you've been in the family a while, posted a few peaces and given us the opportunity to see that your flow is a mature and conscious one ... we are going to be more lenient regarding your use of such words.

If you are new here and walk right in the door cursing, swearing, talking of dicks and pussies ... you are going to be warned and/or your peace edited.

I'm hoping, since we have such a mature crowd, that each one can monitor their own choice of words, keeping me from universally banning more of them.

For example, if you must use the word "dick" and/or "p-ussy," I'd much rather you choose their proper alternatives, i.e., penis and vagina ... if you are using them in that context.

We've not had a problem yet, just trying to stay on top of things (so we don't).

As always, if you have any questions or concerns you can post them here.

Thanks,

Destee

As I type this, I see that I've banned p-u-s-s-y and not dick! What's up with that??!! Hmmmm ...

Peace and Blessings Family,

I don't want anyone to think that i'm just making rules up on them ... i want to show that this has been our policy since January, 2002.

While we try to be tolerant, recognizing that most here are adults, we are not an "anything goes" kind of community. There are rules, and they must be adhered to by everyone ... including myself ... no one is above the rules.

So please ... work with us and we will work with you.

Much Love and Peace.

:heart:

Destee