Why? Online I keep seeing posts from black men saying how lighter complected women look better, and dogging darkskin women in the process. Even black male entertainers have expressed their preferences for lightskin women. It's hard to feel attractive and date with a positive attitude when you're reminded daily that you're not the preferred type

:qqb001:Why? Online I keep seeing posts from black men saying how lighter complected women look better, and dogging darkskin women in the process. Even black male entertainers have expressed their preferences for lightskin women. It's hard to feel attractive and date with a positive attitude when you're reminded daily that you're not the preferred type

:SuN012::puke:



:hearthis:1. Those arent men

2. "Men" know that darkness/complexion has nothing to do with character

3. I prefer dark women.

:bowdown::bowdown::bowdown::bowdown::bowdown::bowd own:

a sister's shade has never mattered to me personally.....I don't really prefer either over the other, although I know of brothers with preferences (I have one boy that loves dark skin sisters and the other that prefers medium brown/caramel complected sisters)...........at the end of the day as long as she's a sister she's straight with me......

I've been very attracted to Black women of all hues, heights, body weights, intellect.

Many people have superficial preferences from childhood. As most people get older, they shed those superficial preferences for what really matters. Find someone who wants you for you....and you'll find someone who'll be by you thick and then.

Have confidence in yourself. No one is attractive to everyone.

you were at the wrong site ....think about it.

"hate"? externally induced self-hate; internalized oppression; just plain stupid.

or

buying in to media portrayals. coupled with a long standing effort (entirely too close to being successful) to "encourage" black students to not think (white kids, when getting excited about learning something new are encouraged in their learning while their excitement is channeled; black kids, when getting excited about learning something new get told that their behavior is inappropriate and any comments are deemed to be further infractions leading to a loss of interest in learning/going to school leading to black adults being extremely defensive at internally perceived feelings of being somewhat behind the learning curve as well as being somewhat derogatory/denigrating of individuals that display a propensity/delight with learning), there seems to be a slight lack of critical analysis of what is being portrayed in the media except when things get too absolutley blatant.

additionally, by showing black people with straight[er] hair, lifestyles outside of "the hood", "token" ceo/"successes", and, yes, sports/entertainment figures with lighter skinned black, and/or white female partners those folks that just won't or can't walk away from that supreme lunacy by turning off that danged "bube tube" just get conditioned to "appreciate" this further desecration/depredation of our Awesome Ancient Ancestral Africanness (Africanity? lol).

naw; i'd prefer that she were darker than me actually, not that i am at all light skinned myself: i'd just dearly love to see us get backer to blacker.

it's like that notion that black men seem to prefer sisters when they toss in that weave over them beautiful naps; culturally induced "mental illness" - they're crazy. personally, like the skin color; when i see that straight[er] hair, i usually sneer ... not quite as hard as when i see the melanin-shy, but the sneer is still there!!

JaylaMarie, thank you for posting this thread. I'm not sure if you were looking for only male responses so I hope I'm not speaking out of turn. But I couldn't hold my tongue. Your comment really disturbed me.

First of all (along with the other comments made by some of the brothers above) I don't believe that to be a true statement. Sure, there may be some men who have preferences but if thats the case then you are not for them anyway. But for the most part I believe men will love and appreciate you for who you are and not your skin tone.

Truth be told, we all have our preferences in certain areas but love always prevails!!!!

"It's hard to feel attractive and date with a positive attitude when you're reminded daily that you're not the preferred type"

But the bottom line is, no matter the comments that are being made, you have got to love you for yourself from the inside out. Feel attractive about you, not because of the attention and affirmation you get from men, but because you can look at yourself in the mirror and see the beauty for yourself. Baby you are a Black Queen and that AUTOMATICALLY grandfathers you as the PREFERRED TYPE!!! And beauty is....WAIT...I wrote something in another thread...and this applies to YOU!

Beauty is the glow of your shade
Beauty is the curve of your neck and shoulder blade
Beauty is the natural gloss of your lips
Beauty is the sensual swagger in your hips

Beauty is the versatility in your style
Beauty is the spark in your feminine wiles
Beauty is the shear nature of your intelligence
Beauty is your dominating presence

Beauty don't see shape or form
Beauty only knows that you are anything but the norm
Beauty is the epitome of the essence of the Black Queen
Beauty is nothing like the images put out there to be seen

Beauty is YOU
Beauty is ME
Beauty is all sizes, large and small, and everything in between
Beauty broke the mold with the birth of the Black Queen!

Be beautiful my dear sistah!!!! Beauty is YOU!!!

Why? Online I keep seeing posts from black men saying how lighter complected women look better, and dogging darkskin women in the process. Even black male entertainers have expressed their preferences for lightskin women. It's hard to feel attractive and date with a positive attitude when you're reminded daily that you're not the preferred type

you need to seek the advice of a mental health professional.

Loving a black dark skin woman is sweeter then any, it never made a different in
the sister shade as long as she a black woman then i'm all for her ....................
now i have notice darker women with lighter men as well as darker men with lighter women
then i see dark on dark as well light on light !
those places where u seen this choice of shades to me i would say they just have a
complextion problem because a sister is a sister no matter her shade
the key is to look beyond da shade and within surely i must tell you every soul is jet black!

Why? Online I keep seeing posts from black men saying how lighter complected women look better, and dogging darkskin women in the process. Even black male entertainers have expressed their preferences for lightskin women. It's hard to feel attractive and date with a positive attitude when you're reminded daily that you're not the preferred type

Simply because SOME black men do not choose dark-skinned women primarly DOES NOT mean that they HATE them. I know that the majority of black women if given the choice would pick Morris Chestnut and Shemarr Moore over me in a heart beat but that does not mean that they hate me. I just keep it movin'.

Sistas it is the result of willie lynchism. It is a psycology that has not been broken yet even though we have made improvement. You dont have to take it personal. I remember in the 80's us brothers went through the same thing. Light skinned brothers got all the play.

It simply a psycological disfunction that plays way deeper than gender. It is harder for a dark skinned teacher, minister, Imaam, etc. To reach the masses that is why the Nation of Islam always used to use Light skinned brothers as their Ministers from Malcolm to Farrakhann. It is easier for us to accept a light skinned person regardless of gender. It is deep rooted from the slavery psyche. that was placed on us...So dont take it personal my beautiful dark olive sistas......Dont take it personal.:kiss2:

Sistas it is the result of willie lynchism. It is a psycology that has not been broken yet even though we have made improvement. You dont have to take it personal. I remember in the 80's us brothers went through the same thing. Light skinned brothers got all the play.

It simply a psycological disfunction that plays way deeper than gender. It is harder for a dark skinned teacher, minister, Imaam, etc. To reach the masses that is why the Nation of Islam always used to use Light skinned brothers as their Ministers from Malcolm to Farrakhann. It is easier for us to accept a light skinned person regardless of gender. It is deep rooted from the slavery psyche. that was placed on us...So dont take it personal my beautiful dark olive sistas......Dont take it personal.:kiss2:





ang-EL,
:bowdown: :teach: :bowdown:

:killpc::gas::qqb020::eek:


Didnt we fight this battle in the 60s?????

Sistas it is the result of willie lynchism. It is a psycology that has not been broken yet even though we have made improvement. You dont have to take it personal. I remember in the 80's us brothers went through the same thing. Light skinned brothers got all the play.

It simply a psycological disfunction that plays way deeper than gender. It is harder for a dark skinned teacher, minister, Imaam, etc. To reach the masses that is why the Nation of Islam always used to use Light skinned brothers as their Ministers from Malcolm to Farrakhann. It is easier for us to accept a light skinned person regardless of gender. It is deep rooted from the slavery psyche. that was placed on us...So dont take it personal my beautiful dark olive sistas......Dont take it personal.:kiss2:

:bowdown::bowdown::bowdown:
THANK YOU FOR SHARING!!!
:bowdown::bowdown::bowdown:

:killpc::gas::qqb020::eek:


Didnt we fight this battle in the 60s?????












As I read your words I thought, because "Recovery is a Journey and not an event"... this is what I've come to know for me.

Also, The tactics of "breaking her Spirit" is not dead and over with. It has continued. And when her Spirit is broken in and she knows her place....she teaches him. Also seems the enemy has not stopped fighting. Maybe smaddy forgot to tell them the battle was over...until then....A Luta Continua

UNLESS....WE begin to recognize the signs of the breaking process...and HALT it right there...as one part of a solution....

:bowdown::bowdown::bowdown:
THANK YOU FOR SHARING!!!
:bowdown::bowdown::bowdown:



As I read your words I thought, because "Recovery is a Journey and not an event"... this is what I've come to know for me.

Also, The tactics of "breaking her Spirit" is not dead and over with. It has continued. And when her Spirit is broken in and she knows her place....she teaches him. Also seems the enemy has not stopped fighting. Maybe smaddy forgot to tell them the battle was over...until then....A Luta Continua

UNLESS....WE begin to recognize the signs of the breaking process...and HALT it right there...as one part of a solution....


:bam::em3000::qqb019:


Naw. This is a battle we faught in the 60s. I submit that this sister needs a qick and intensive brush up on black history. The only issue today is getting these "mixed race" People str8 lol

:bam::em3000::qqb019:


Naw. This is a battle we faught in the 60s. I submit that this sister needs a qick and intensive brush up on black history. The only issue today is getting these "mixed race" People str8 lol

and that's a pretty tall task there...requiring a lot of work...
and btw Kemestry....must you always do this :bam:


M.E.
:hearts2:

and that's a pretty tall task there...requiring a lot of work...
and btw Kemestry....must you always do this :bam:


M.E.
:hearts2:



Sometimes people need some sense knocked in them. :flamet::whip::smash:

:toast:

Sometimes people need some sense knocked in them
:SuN041:.....maybe you should try taking your own advice?

:SuN041:.....maybe you should try taking your own advice?



:qqb004::skillet:

Keep on, Imma tell asocalledAfrican you over here :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Keep on, Imma tell asocalledAfrican you over here

:SuN008:ok, you win.....

Why? Online I keep seeing posts from black men saying how lighter complected women look better, and dogging darkskin women in the process. Even black male entertainers have expressed their preferences for lightskin women. It's hard to feel attractive and date with a positive attitude when you're reminded daily that you're not the preferred type


HELLO JaylaMaria....

I also think the word hate is too strong of a word.... personally I don't know of any brothers that hate any sisters. Not because of skin tone anyway. I have found some that may have some personal grievances with the sister, but it was not about her skin tone.

Lilpea...

I am from Louisiana and yes ova here your gonna hear some young men talk about light skin sistahs being their choice...I also want you to know that their are some fine and I mean fine brothers who won't even conversate or touch me because I am light skin.

I have dark cousins who don't won't nothing else but dark skin sistahs...and thats who they have their family with...and I might add that not all of them have big boodies. I think it has something to do with childhood!

I am light skinned and all three of my daughters is from caramel to Bliggity Black...my oldest like em light skinned but says she would date a darker brother. My Middle child who is the darkest and so beautifull....likes em all flavors. The youngest just like muscles...lol...you should see her when she sees LLCoolJ...she just shakes...LOLOL. I sometimes think she gonna bring a white boy to my house..lol!!! Let's just hope it's a muscule bound brother!!!

Oh I have a uncle who is black and purto rican and his wife is real Bliggity Black and she all black...so again it is not a flaw in you ...I am sure you are a beautiful sistah...just keep your head up and walk like a champion...OK!!!!!!!!!

Peace!:hearts4:

:SuN008:ok, you win.....



:hearthis::zipit::10400::em3700:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Why? Online I keep seeing posts from black men saying how lighter complected women look better, and dogging darkskin women in the process. Even black male entertainers have expressed their preferences for lightskin women. It's hard to feel attractive and date with a positive attitude when you're reminded daily that you're not the preferred type
Why Do (Black Men) Hate Darskin Women?

ALL WOMEN HAVE A BEAUTY AND ALL WOMEN ARE BEAUTIFUL IN THEIR OWN UNIQUE WAY.

HERE'S ANOTHER QUESTION:

WHY DO SOME OF US BLACK MEN STILL LOVE DARK SKINNED BLACK WOMEN THE ORIGINAL GODDESSES?

I LET THE FOLLOWING VIDEOS ANSWERS THIS QUESTION FOR YOU.

Beautiful Black Women
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sn0liuIvEow&NR=1
Sn0liuIvEow&NR=1


Hidden beauty
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gK1h030lj4o&NR=1
gK1h030lj4o&NR=1

Black is beautiful
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjSc10eT5gU&NR=1
IjSc10eT5gU&NR=1

Why? Online I keep seeing posts from black men saying how lighter complected women look better, and dogging darkskin women in the process. Even black male entertainers have expressed their preferences for lightskin women. It's hard to feel attractive and date with a positive attitude when you're reminded daily that you're not the preferred type

I am from Louisiana and yes ova here your gonna hear some young men talk about light skin sistahs being their choice...I also want you to know that their are some fine and I mean fine brothers who won't even conversate or touch me because I am light skin.

I have dark cousins who don't won't nothing else but dark skin sistahs...and thats who they have their family with...and I might add that not all of them have big boodies. I think it has something to do with childhood!

I am light skinned and all three of my daughters is from caramel to Bliggity Black...my oldest like em light skinned but says she would date a darker brother. My Middle child who is the darkest and so beautifull....likes em all flavors. The youngest just like muscles...lol...you should see her when she sees LLCoolJ...she just shakes...LOLOL. I sometimes think she gonna bring a white boy to my house..lol!!! Let's just hope it's a muscule bound brother!!!

Oh I have a uncle who is black and purto rican and his wife is real Bliggity Black and she all black...so again it is not a flaw in you ...I am sure you are a beautiful sistah...just keep your head up and walk like a champion...OK!!!!!!!!!

Peace!:hearts4:

Where is Brotha Pan when you need him lol
Beloved Sister... I'm mixed and pretty light bright and my experiences are similar to sister Jazzytudes. I WISH I got as much attention as my dark skin cousins did growing up LOL As a matter of a fact, my biological father told my mother I couldnt be his because I was so light lol I love him but I cant stand him and yet I know he will always be a part of me because the brothas I am most attracted to, tend to be dark skinned.

But sister... Brotha Kem in his most BROTHA KEM way has a point... (*side note* To my sisters please do not revoke my sisterhood card for agreeing with brotha Kem) You have to guard your mind very closely my sister, there will be MANY things that are said and perpetuated that will bring your SN into affect (SN = SISTAH NECK lol make you snap your neck back like "OH HEO NO!" :) )

BUT these things around us in this white mans society are never what they seem. You cant accept them as truths simply because of an implication as such... tread easy my young sister, read everything, test anything, your mind your perception your wholistic view is everything. You have to truly know whats at work in every situation otherwise you WILL be inclined to accuse our brothas of turning against us or hating our sistahs because there is division amongst us... but it doesnt have to be that way sister... I can understand what you are saying but I strongly suggest my beloved sister that you step back and garner a complete view before you accept something as a truth. I have no doubt you are a beautiful blak woman, so dont allow something of such distaste to taint that :grouphug:

Tyra Banks discuss...
Light Skin Blacks Vs Dark Skin Blacks
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7uUAbUv8sk
O7uUAbUv8sk

The best of "Tyra" (video)
http://www.236.com/feed/2008/04/25/the_best_of_tyra_video_6121.php

Peace and Bless Sistah!


I am from Louisiana and yes ova here your gonna hear some young men talk about light skin sistahs being their choice...I also want you to know that their are some fine and I mean fine brothers who won't even conversate or touch me because I am light skin.

I have dark cousins who don't won't nothing else but dark skin sistahs...and thats who they have their family with...and I might add that not all of them have big boodies. I think it has something to do with childhood!

I am light skinned and all three of my daughters is from caramel to Bliggity Black...my oldest like em light skinned but says she would date a darker brother. My Middle child who is the darkest and so beautifull....likes em all flavors. The youngest just like muscles...lol...you should see her when she sees LLCoolJ...she just shakes...LOLOL. I sometimes think she gonna bring a white boy to my house..lol!!! Let's just hope it's a muscule bound brother!!!

Oh I have a uncle who is black and purto rican and his wife is real Bliggity Black and she all black...so again it is not a flaw in you ...I am sure you are a beautiful sistah...just keep your head up and walk like a champion...OK!!!!!!!!!

Peace!:hearts4:




Jazzytude,
:bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown:





ang-EL, if you see this, give a call Man!

But sister... Brotha Kem in his most BROTHA KEM way has a point... (*side note* To my sisters please do not revoke my sisterhood card for agreeing with brotha Kem) You have to guard your mind very closely my sister, there will be MANY things that are said and perpetuated that will bring your SN into affect (SN = SISTAH NECK lol make you snap your neck back like "OH HEO NO!" )

:great:

.o0( Another female in my clutches. My plan is coming together! )

:qqb007::great::great:

I have seen sistahs with permed hair come here and complain because the brothahs say they prefer natural. And of course there are sistahs who complain about brothahs who prefer straight hair. We can't go through life thinking everybody is supposed to like us then get bent out of shape when we meet someone who doesn't.

I have seen women as black as the ace of spades surrounded with the love and respect of the men in their lives because they expect it and we are magnets to what we expect socially. But if we are insecure and worried that someone doesn't like us then that will be our experience. Perception is reality.

I have seen sistahs with permed hair come here and complain because the brothahs say they prefer natural. And of course there are sistahs who complain about brothahs who prefer straight hair. We can't go through life thinking everybody is supposed to like us then get bent out of shape when we meet someone who doesn't.

I have seen women as black as the ace of spades surrounded with the love and respect of the men in their lives because they expect it and we are magnets to what we expect socially. But if we are insecure and worried that someone doesn't like us then that will be our experience. Perception is reality.





river,
:bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown:

Well, I'm hearing the black guys at school talk about how hot Kim Kardashian is, and other lightskin and nonblack women. It makes me feel very unpretty. And if they do talk about African women they are usually the East African ones who are light complected with striaght hair. I remember hearing the guys in the cafeteria talk about how light and beautiful they were. I hear this stuff from black men quite a lot. I don't even want to associate iwth most of them

Well, I'm hearing the black guys at school talk about how hot Kim Kardashian is, and other lightskin and nonblack women. It makes me feel very unpretty. And if they do talk about African women they are usually the East African ones who are light complected with striaght hair. I remember hearing the guys in the cafeteria talk about how light and beautiful they were. I hear this stuff from black men quite a lot. I don't even want to associate iwth most of them

if you base your self esteem on what others think you will not make it.

if you base your self esteem on what others think you will not make it.

That's true. You can't stop people from talking. There are men in the world who like tall women. Shall I let their comments bend me out of shape because I am 5'1 and a quarter inch? All my life I have been teased because I have more nose than is actually necessary for the purpose of respiration. Twenty years ago a man told me I have a sexy nose. It is totally up to me to let that one positive comment outshine all the negative or to let the negative overshadow the positive. Easier said than done? Of course it is but the only things that grow without our effort are weeds.

Secret #298:Master the fine art of saying Yuck Fou (in your mind, of course) and move on.

That's true. You can't stop people from talking. There are men in the world who like tall women. Shall I let their comments bend me out of shape because I am 5'1 and a quarter inch? All my life I have been teased because I have more nose than is actually necessary for the purpose of respiration. Twenty years ago a man told me I have a sexy nose. It is totally up to me to let that one positive comment outshine all the negative or to let the negative overshadow the positive. Easier said than done? Of course it is but the only things that grow without our effort are weeds.

Secret #298:Master the fine art of saying Yuck Fou (in your mind, of course) and move on.




river,

Glad you are back and posting, river. And rocking as usual. My Friend, please check your profile for a note.

True beauty is skin deep not by shade of the skin .....when you hear guys making a different between skin tone these are the streotype of guys .

Dark n' lovely is where the sweet essense lay but i'm one who never have looked at
any black woman from the outside or shade of her skin.

Sistas it is the result of willie lynchism. It is a psycology that has not been broken yet even though we have made improvement. You dont have to take it personal. I remember in the 80's us brothers went through the same thing. Light skinned brothers got all the play.

It simply a psycological disfunction that plays way deeper than gender. It is harder for a dark skinned teacher, minister, Imaam, etc. To reach the masses that is why the Nation of Islam always used to use Light skinned brothers as their Ministers from Malcolm to Farrakhann. It is easier for us to accept a light skinned person regardless of gender. It is deep rooted from the slavery psyche. that was placed on us...So dont take it personal my beautiful dark olive sistas......Dont take it personal.:kiss2:


I can't relate to this statement at all. I can't think of anyone I know who has this psycho-logical disposition with any black person based on their hue. Maybe possibly (and this is a looonnngg stretch) that they might have had a psychological disfunction b4 they knew me. And maybe some are not expressing that aspect around me (they would know better :em1500:).

Birds of a feather flock together. Ain't no person with that 'psycological disfunction' gonna fly with me. And for some reason I can't see someone with that ailment fly in the flock of the NOI either.
I'm just keeping it a hundred.:madd:
Now I'LL get back on track with the theme of the thread.
__________________________________________________ _______________
IOriginally Posted by JaylaMaria111
Well, I'm hearing the black guys at school talk about how hot Kim Kardashian is, and other lightskin and nonblack women. It makes me feel very unpretty. And if they do talk about African women they are usually the East African ones who are light complected with striaght hair. I remember hearing the guys in the cafeteria talk about how light and beautiful they were. I hear this stuff from black men quite a lot. I don't even want to associate iwth most of them

I hope this is just a perspective from a 'youth'. Every brother (and in this case brothers) ain't 'your' brother. And if your listening to statements in the particular mind state where a persons words can shape your reality (the reality in your mind that makes you feel 'unpretty'). You simply have to do 2 things

1. check ya self B4 you wreck self. Meaning, don't allow your person to let someone elses words change the reality of how you see your self.

If you don't see your self as an attractive person, then your problem is deeper
than these ppl your 'person' is listening to.

2. Find the flock of birds your need to fly with (I couldn't think of a hiphop quote this time, sry) For starters there's this website I go to a lot called Destee.com there's alot brotha and sistas there i think you'll like. :kick:And I'd use their collective mentality as a standard to find your 'offline' flock of folks to vibe with.
I believe this will begin to relieve some of the stress in your life.

Hotep

I'm sick of watching television or the radio and hearing comments from rappers/entertainers saying they don't like darkskin women. I keep hearing this kind of stuff all the time. I cannot escape it. Even with guy friends who are black, they seem to favor the women with straight hair and lighter skin more.

I'm sick of watching television or the radio and hearing comments from rappers/entertainers saying they don't like darkskin women. I keep hearing this kind of stuff all the time. I cannot escape it. Even with guy friends who are black, they seem to favor the women with straight hair and lighter skin more.

with maturity comes the wonderful occurance of being comfortable in your own skin...i'm not calling you immature...i'm just saying, when you become comfortable in your own skin...all of that other bs wont even matter...

one love
khasm

How can you do that when everyone and everything around you seems to be telling you that lighter is better? On a regular basis I hear this. I can't even watch television without being reminded of this, especially music videos. It would be easier if I weren't bombarded with this on a regular basis

How can you do that when everyone and everything around you seems to be telling you that lighter is better? On a regular basis I hear this. I can't even watch television without being reminded of this, especially music videos. It would be easier if I weren't bombarded with this on a regular basis

the difference between being a leader and a follower is that a leader builds his/her own moral and ethical structure then proceeds to lead by example...a follower just looks at what the next man/woman is doing and incorporates it into their life...

tv is one big propaganda box so u have to expect that from them(if u don't like it turn it off)...now the people that u are talking about is another thing...if u r around people that don't like dark skinned woman then the choice seems obvious to me...don't be around them...hang around like minds...quite frankly, i haven't seen too many brothers in chicago that don't like dark skinned women...real talk

one love
khasm

How can you do that when everyone and everything around you seems to be telling you that lighter is better? On a regular basis I hear this. I can't even watch television without being reminded of this, especially music videos. It would be easier if I weren't bombarded with this on a regular basis

you chose what you are bombarded with. i do not watch things which do not nourish my spirit. i do not watch music videos.


from what you have posted here you seem to be a person who enjoys pain.
when you stop enjoying it you will find another way.

How can you do that when everyone and everything around you seems to be telling you that lighter is better? On a regular basis I hear this. I can't even watch television without being reminded of this, especially music videos. It would be easier if I weren't bombarded with this on a regular basis

Young sistah... you cant allow media to be the reference for your own SELF ESTEEM. Otherwise, you will fall prey to those insecurities THEY want for you. I can also double over brotha Khasms sentiments, I live in the Bay Area CA and dark skin sistahs get mad love here - ESPECIALLY from men of other races. I've encountered many black men out here that prefer dark skin women... men in my family included lol

Look honey, bottom line, you are the active catalyst here - You allow others to define you... then yes my beautiful young sistah you will feel down. Dont let that be the case. :grouphug:

Lighter is never better.
This is merely a slave mentality.
Most of the media is controlled by whites so you will see lighter skin on tv.
I wish we would stop seperating each other by shade.

I'm sick of watching television or the radio and hearing comments from rappers/entertainers saying they don't like darkskin women. I keep hearing this kind of stuff all the time. I cannot escape it. Even with guy friends who are black, they seem to favor the women with straight hair and lighter skin more.

This is post number 37 and you are still saying the same thing you said in post number one. Why you telling us about it? We can't control what people say. So if you choose to let what they say make you sick then you will stay sick. Just watch we will be looking at post number 5010 and you will still be talking about how what people say makes you sick.

This is post number 37 and you are still saying the same thing you said in post number one. Why you telling us about it? We can't control what people say. So if you choose to let what they say make you sick then you will stay sick. Just watch we will be looking at post number 5010 and you will still be talking about how what people say makes you sick.

:read: My thoughts exactly sister River :read:

:read: My thoughts exactly sister River :read:

Hey sistah triniti, love to see your name.

Tell you what. You move to where sister jay is so you can be around men who like light skinned women and she can move to the Bay area to be around men who like dark skin. That way everybody gets what they want :D.

hello!!!!!!
JaylaMaria111
:hi:
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This isn't my top 10 but I can still concur that these are some beautiful women

The Black Race is the rainbow race with all the wonderful colors of diverse hue. I am fair skinned but prefer darker coloration. Perhaps people want what they are not. I think those men that choose strictly for color are suffering from slave mentality and perhaps self hatred. Its all the result of slave mentality and colonialism.

Since I do a show on an African Radio station I spend more time with African people and I have to tell you if some of these men saw the grace and beauty of these dark and even black skinned women they might rethink their bias. These women look like Ebony velvet. Just stunning. The lighter women seem pale in comparison. No pun intended.

But the bottomline is we need to stop making color the issue and choose our mates or partners via the complexion of their nature.

I wish we could heal from this ugly scar left over by racism, slavery and oppression but it will take a while. It starts with reeducation. Seeing ourselves as a worthy, intelligent, creative, spiritual people rich in talent and rich in color. If we could see ourselves as whole and uplift ourselves, we could see the beauty of who we are. in all our shades.

if one has a desire to feel bad, they will find something to feel bad over......

The Black Race is the rainbow race with all the wonderful colors of diverse hue. I am fair skinned but prefer darker coloration. Perhaps people want what they are not. I think those men that choose strictly for color are suffering from slave mentality and perhaps self hatred. Its all the result of slave mentality and colonialism.

Since I do a show on an African Radio station I spend more time with African people and I have to tell you if some of these men saw the grace and beauty of these dark and even black skinned women they might rethink their bias. These women look like Ebony velvet. Just stunning. The lighter women seem pale in comparison. No pun intended.

But the bottomline is we need to stop making color the issue and choose our mates or partners via the complexion of their nature.

I wish we could heal from this ugly scar left over by racism, slavery and oppression but it will take a while. It starts with reeducation. Seeing ourselves as a worthy, intelligent, creative, spiritual people rich in talent and rich in color. If we could see ourselves as whole and uplift ourselves, we could see the beauty of who we are. in all our shades.




Writspirit,

You are so correct, which is why we have organized our group to discover the truth and remove the ignorance attached to racism. Your input is simply invaluable toward our goal, and I am glad to have you on the proactive team, in lieu of just discussing the matter........thanks for coming onboard!

How can you do that when everyone and everything around you seems to be telling you that lighter is better? On a regular basis I hear this. I can't even watch television without being reminded of this, especially music videos. It would be easier if I weren't bombarded with this on a regular basis


I don't know what to tell you little sistah. I cannot think of a more sexier image than a curvey dark skinned sistah and a full-blown natural.

That is almost too much to take.

ALL WOMEN HAVE A BEAUTY AND ALL WOMEN ARE BEAUTIFUL IN THEIR OWN UNIQUE WAY.

HERE'S ANOTHER QUESTION:

WHY DO SOME OF US BLACK MEN STILL LOVE DARK SKINNED BLACK WOMEN THE ORIGINAL GODDESSES?

I LET THE FOLLOWING VIDEOS ANSWERS THIS QUESTION FOR YOU.

Beautiful Black Women
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sn0liuIvEow&NR=1
Sn0liuIvEow&NR=1


Hidden beauty
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gK1h030lj4o&NR=1
gK1h030lj4o&NR=1

Black is beautiful
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjSc10eT5gU&NR=1
IjSc10eT5gU&NR=1

Here's another thing to think about.... well, I'll let James Brown do his thing...

James Brown - Say it loud I'm black and I'm proud
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2VRSAVDlpDI
2VRSAVDlpDI

Here's another thing to think about.... well, I'll let James Brown do his thing...

James Brown - Say it loud I'm black and I'm proud
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2VRSAVDlpDI
2VRSAVDlpDI

Jungle Fever: The Relationship Between African Men and White Women
http://www.thedisplacedafrican.com/77/jungle-fever-white-women-black-men-relationships/

Jungle Fever 2: The Relationship Between White Men and African Women
http://www.thedisplacedafrican.com/280/jungle-fever-2-the-relationship-between-white-men-and-african-women/

EVEN JAMES BROWN LIKE DIFFERENT FLAVORS...

http://chronicle.augusta.com/images/headlines/012904/15034_512.jpg

http://www.soundoffcolumn.com/images/tomi-ray-james-son.jpg

http://www.soundoffcolumn.com/images/james-brown-son.jpg

Jungle Fever: The Relationship Between African Men and White Women
http://www.thedisplacedafrican.com/77/jungle-fever-white-women-black-men-relationships/

Jungle Fever 2: The Relationship Between White Men and African Women
http://www.thedisplacedafrican.com/280/jungle-fever-2-the-relationship-between-white-men-and-african-women/

EVEN JAMES BROWN LIKE DIFFERENT FLAVORS...

http://chronicle.augusta.com/images/headlines/012904/15034_512.jpg

http://www.soundoffcolumn.com/images/tomi-ray-james-son.jpg

http://www.soundoffcolumn.com/images/james-brown-son.jpg



:SuN016::gossip:*sigh*



Over 95% of all black people are with black people of the opposite sex. Why are you so concerned about a statisitical anomoly????

Over 95% of all black people are with black people of the opposite sex. Why are you so concerned about a statisitical anomoly????
some folks just enjoy feeling bad.....

some folks just enjoy feeling bad.....





Apparently

some folks just enjoy feeling bad.....

don't be so hard on yourself...

http://www.filmschoolrejects.com/images/jack-joker.jpg

Apparently
now let me put a smile on your face...

http://th01.deviantart.com/fs8/300W/i/2005/358/5/b/President_Joker_by_kurai_ryuu.jpg

I HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER...:kickball:

That's a wierd looking little kid.
I thought two unattractive folks were supposed to have cute kids.
He has the face of an adult white man.

now let me put a smile on your face...

http://th01.deviantart.com/fs8/300W/i/2005/358/5/b/President_Joker_by_kurai_ryuu.jpg

I HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER...:kickball:




I dont think how I feel is at issue. I'm not the one trying to present a statistical anomoly as the norm. We're just trying to figure out where all this self hatred came from.

I dont think how I feel is at issue. I'm not the one trying to present a statistical anomoly as the norm. We're just trying to figure out where all this self hatred came from.

..AND WHAT IS SELF HATE? THE MAN IN THE MIRROR, BUT DON'T STARE AT HIM TOO LONG...

..AND WHAT IS SELF HATE? THE MAN IN THE MIRROR, BUT DON'T STARE AT HIM TOO LONG...

Then you must be at peace in your heart. The man in the mirror is a reflection of our current emotions. I remember when I used to could see myself in a mirror, sometimes I'd see my big bright almond shaped eyes and sometimes I'd look and all I could see is nose. I know other people are just as inconstant in their opinions.

in point of fact, black men love dark skin women.
there are some punks who prefer the light skin but in general we men love the dark skin.

we love our sisters all shades and shapes.

this is so blatantly obvious to me that i question any one who does not see it.

Then you must be at peace in your heart. The man in the mirror is a reflection of our current emotions. I remember when I used to could see myself in a mirror, sometimes I'd see my big bright almond shaped eyes and sometimes I'd look and all I could see is nose. I know other people are just as inconstant in their opinions.
YES SISTER RIVER, I'M AT PEACE WITH MYSELF. I DON'T DISLIKE PEOPLE BECAUSE OF THEIR DARK SKIN COLOR OR LIGHT SKIN COLOR. DISLIKING PEOPLE BECAUSE OF THEIR SKIN COLOR IS WRONG AND HATRED. THE POINT I WAS TRYING TO MAKE IS PEOPLE WHO THINK THAT WAY HAVE A VERY SERIOUS PROBLEM WITH SELF.

ALL WOMEN HAVE A BEAUTY AND ALL WOMEN ARE BEAUTIFUL IN THEIR OWN UNIQUE WAY.

HERE'S ANOTHER QUESTION:

WHY DO SOME OF US BLACK MEN STILL LOVE DARK SKINNED BLACK WOMEN THE ORIGINAL GODDESSES?

I LET THE FOLLOWING VIDEOS ANSWERS THIS QUESTION FOR YOU.

Beautiful Black Women
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sn0liuIvEow&NR=1
Sn0liuIvEow&NR=1


Hidden beauty
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gK1h030lj4o&NR=1
gK1h030lj4o&NR=1

Black is beautiful
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjSc10eT5gU&NR=1
IjSc10eT5gU&NR=1

Here's another thing to think about.... well, I'll let James Brown do his thing...

James Brown - Say it loud I'm black and I'm proud
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2VRSAVDlpDI
2VRSAVDlpDI


Jungle Fever: The Relationship Between African Men and White Women
http://www.thedisplacedafrican.com/77/jungle-fever-white-women-black-men-relationships/

Jungle Fever 2: The Relationship Between White Men and African Women
http://www.thedisplacedafrican.com/280/jungle-fever-2-the-relationship-between-white-men-and-african-women/

EVEN JAMES BROWN LIKE DIFFERENT FLAVORS...

http://chronicle.augusta.com/images/headlines/012904/15034_512.jpg

http://www.soundoffcolumn.com/images/tomi-ray-james-son.jpg

http://www.soundoffcolumn.com/images/james-brown-son.jpg

Everyone has their preference. People like what they like. Do I think the vast majority of black men hate dark skin women? No I do not. My father is a light skin man, my mother was a brown skin woman. Together they created children that are different shades of brown, with me being the darkest. The ignorance of color bashing is an age old issue and will probably continue to be an issue until the end of time. Some folks like tall people, some like short people, some like fat people, some like skinny and the list can go on. There is nothing anyone can do to change individual preference. I do not hate anyone because they look a certain way and I would hope no one hates me because I look a certain way. But if they do then *shrugs* oh well.....my grandmother says it best.....one monkey don't stop no show......:10200:

in point of fact, black men love dark skin women.
there are some punks who prefer the light skin but in general we men love the dark skin.

we love our sisters all shades and shapes.

this is so blatantly obvious to me that i question any one who does not see it.

and your sistas love you:qqb015:

you sexy thing you

Everyone has their preference. People like what they like. Do I think the vast majority of black men hate dark skin women? No I do not. My father is a light skin man, my mother was a brown skin woman. Together they created children that are different shades of brown, with me being the darkest. The ignorance of color bashing is an age old issue and will probably continue to be an issue until the end of time. Some folks like tall people, some like short people, some like fat people, some like skinny and the list can go on. There is nothing anyone can do to change individual preference. I do not hate anyone because they look a certain way and I would hope no one hates me because I look a certain way. But if they do then *shrugs* oh well.....my grandmother says it best.....one monkey don't stop no show......:10200:
Right on sistah, different strokes...you know the rest.

And as my grandmother used to say you have to be really important for folks to take time out of their day to talk about you.

Right on sistah, different strokes...you know the rest.

And as my grandmother used to say you have to be really important for folks to take time out of their day to talk about you.

That is so true LOL!

Right on sistah, different strokes...you know the rest.

And as my grandmother used to say you have to be really important for folks to take time out of their day to talk about you.




river,

Well..........Sister river,

How about this stroke! Would you be willing to do some editing for our group: What is the Origin of Racism? I have been after you now for about a week or so, and finally caught up:horse: with you for a decision. What say you?

river,

Well..........Sister river,

How about this stroke! Would you be willing to do some editing for our group: What is the Origin of Racism? I have been after you now for about a week or so, and finally caught up:horse: with you for a decision. What say you?



Brotha Clyde, I am not a moderator. I can not edit other people's posts.

Brotha Clyde, I am not a moderator. I can not edit other people's posts.





river,

We need to talk, what do you suggest? So that I can explain why you can in this particular Project!

Brotha Clyde, I am not a moderator. I can not edit other people's posts.

:wave:you can edit my posts any time you want to.....:haha:

:wave:you can edit my posts any time you want to.....:haha:

How do I edit thee? Let me count the ways.

Brotha Clyde, I am not a moderator. I can not edit other people's posts.




river,

I will leave a detail note on your Profile Page, please read it!

river,

We need to talk, what do you suggest? So that I can explain why you can in this particular Project!



Start a thread in the Open Forum or send me a pm so as not to high jack our sista's thread here

river,

I will leave a detail note on your Profile Page, please read it!



ok

Start a thread in the Open Forum or send me a pm so as not to high jack our sista's thread here





I will do both, A PM and Proflile Page!

in point of fact, black men love dark skin women.
there are some punks who prefer the light skin but in general we men love the dark skin.



Well, I have certainly been entertained through all these dialogues. I wanna say brother jamesfrmphilly...I thought you comment here was a bit..sharp. In fact, I think quite many of your comments lack sentiment and compassion, but that is for another discussion.

Honestly, I can feel this sistahs pain. There was a time, when I was not even secure in myself as a light skinned sistah, cas I moved to an area in Richmond Virginia, where there was nothing but dark skinned sistahs. And I will say, the hate they displayed towards light skinned sistahs was very thick. And lawd, if you sounded white, they would really make ya life hell. BUT, I am so very glad that I allowed the Lord to intervene, and show me my identity in HIM.

See that is the real problem here. If you know your identity in HIM, than the ignorance of others will not play on your mental as heavily as it is. It is the devil who wants to keep you down, so you wont realize your magnificent potential in HIM.

You have to get your INSIDE's right (spirit, and soul) so you can get your outside STRUT on! And a wonderful thing will happen...that energy, that magnificent glow that the Lord will develop in you....will have the RIGHT brothas bowing at your feet.

Besides...why would you want some ignorant man, who says stupid things like that?? That should tell you right then and there, that you are dealing with a child, and what you want is a GROWN man. Someone, who is mature enough to know that how a Woman Feels About Herself is more important than any coat of paint you slap on her.....




4*28*08

I wanna say brother jamesfrmphilly...I thought you comment here was a bit..sharp. In fact, I think quite many of your comments lack sentiment and compassion
:qqb004:that would depend on how you define compassion wouldn't it?



BTW: you chose to leave out this part of my comments, why?
we love our sisters all shades and shapes
too sentimental?

Yes (smile) I do recognize that you included that comment as well....


I just thought perhaps in your attempt to uplift the darkskinned woman
( which are worthy of being lifted ) that we should not denouce other people by the selection of our words. Dating anyone of any color is not being a punk....the motivation behind it, is what constitutes it to being punkish.

Cas on tha real...when a dude tell me, "Oh, I like redbones, I like light skinned women" I look at them and say "That's not cute. That doesn't flatter me. I didn't earn my color by any significant means...it was simply given to me. All my beautiful sisters are lovely, and desirable, and wonderfully made"

I do not consider being light-skinned a compliment, but yet a division. And a hurtful one at that.

Words matter.... and how we say things, Mattter.



4*28*08

Yes (smile) I do recognize that you included that comment as well....


I just thought perhaps in your attempt to uplift the darkskinned woman
( which are worthy of being lifted ) that we should not denouce other people by the selection of our words. Dating anyone of any color is not being a punk....the motivation behind it, is what constitutes it to being punkish.

Cas on tha real...when a dude tell me, "Oh, I like redbones, I like light skinned women" I look at them and say "That's not cute. That doesn't flatter me. I didn't earn my color by any significant means...it was simply given to me. All my beautiful sisters are lovely, and desirable, and wonderfully made"

I do not consider being light-skinned a compliment, but yet a division. And a hurtful one at that.

Words matter.... and how we say things, Mattter.



4*28*08




sweet apple*Pie,
:bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown:

Words matter.... and how we say things, Mattter.
i agree. you right. FWIW my grams was a redbone. my father was light. my mother dark.
i have all shades in me and around me. i love all. many of us do.

what i was referring to is the punk butte brother who be favoring dem mulatto looking video hos.
i not criticizing the light ladies. i am down on him.

I would like to say that I, as an individual do not prefer the lighter "complexioned" to the dark of the beautiful brown skinned woman.

I've been very attracted to Black women of all hues, heights, body weights, intellect.

Many people have superficial preferences from childhood. As most people get older, they shed those superficial preferences for what really matters. Find someone who wants you for you....and you'll find someone who'll be by you thick and then.

Have confidence in yourself. No one is attractive to everyone. YOU ARE SO RIGHT! I REMEMBER AS A YOUNGER LADY DATING ME BEING LIGHT COMPLEXECTED I WAS ATTRACTED TO CHOCOLATE DARK SKIN MALES I MUST SAY NOW THAT I'VE BECOME A WOMAN MY SHALLOWNESS NO LONGER EXIST AS LONG AS A BROTHA CAN HOLD HIS OWN AND CHERISH A GOOD HEARTED WOMAN ALL ELSE IS IRREVALENT!

I'm of a light brown tone but i actually like dark skinned women more than the lighter ones for some reason.

As alwayz don't matter if you a sister then it's you i want ....light brown dark cocolate
a sister is a sister a queen a woman of colored.

Why? Online I keep seeing posts from black men saying how lighter complected women look better, and dogging darkskin women in the process. Even black male entertainers have expressed their preferences for lightskin women. It's hard to feel attractive and date with a positive attitude when you're reminded daily that you're not the preferred type

I haven't read through all of the comment but I'm sorry to here that our people have to put up with such issues from our own. With this being said:

I love all of our sistas equally but for some reason I've primarily been with my dark sistas. I have no preference but it is something about our jet black sistas that causes me to turn my head even when I'm not supposed to. Again, I love my light skin sistas to but as far as beauty is concerned, this nonsense has got to stop and accept our cultural beauties.

Jet black to coffee cream, I will never forget about our sistas in between.

Peace and Blessings

I question the motives of those that dismiss the claims, the pain, and the very real experience of being discriminated against from within one's own race/family and beyond it. This is a very real issue and not acknowledging it does not make it go away. Speaking about an issue does not create a seperatism that is not already there. Often times speaking out about wrongs experienced, empowers the person who has the courage to speak on it.

Some people do not want to acknowledge the plight of dark men and women because to bring such a thing to the light diminshes it. There are plenty of people who benefit from opressing their own family members in these modern day times. Suppressing a problem does not help anyone who truly wants an answer to such a a problem. And theres is no doubt that colorism affects all of us in so many areas that its hard to even name them....ie, family structure, culture, academia, history, getting jobs, etc. etc.

What you have shared in this post is true, but what we need to remember is that colorism is like the notion of white 'supremacy'---it can only exists where Black people allow it. The key lies in taking back our power; when we learn how to truly engage in self-love, the rest takes care of itself.



I question the motives of those that dismiss the claims, the pain, and the very real experience of being discriminated against from within one's own race/family and beyond it. This is a very real issue and not acknowledging it does not make it go away. Speaking about an issue does not create a seperatism that is not already there. Often times speaking out about wrongs experienced, empowers the person who has the courage to speak on it.

Some people do not want to acknowledge the plight of dark men and women because to bring such a thing to the light diminshes it. There are plenty of people who benefit from opressing their own family members in these modern day times. Suppressing a problem does not help anyone who truly wants an answer to such a a problem. And theres is no doubt that colorism affects all of us in so many areas that its hard to even name them....ie, family structure, culture, academia, history, getting jobs, etc. etc.

I question the motives of those that dismiss the claims, the pain, and the very real experience of being discriminated against from within one's own race/family and beyond it. This is a very real issue and not acknowledging it does not make it go away. Speaking about an issue does not create a seperatism that is not already there. Often times speaking out about wrongs experienced, empowers the person who has the courage to speak on it.

Some people do not want to acknowledge the plight of dark men and women because to bring such a thing to the light diminshes it. There are plenty of people who benefit from opressing their own family members in these modern day times. Suppressing a problem does not help anyone who truly wants an answer to such a a problem. And theres is no doubt that colorism affects all of us in so many areas that its hard to even name them....ie, family structure, culture, academia, history, getting jobs, etc. etc.


Great post!


I've seen the "color line" drawn in families and in the workplace amongst Blacks.

I've seen dark skinned Blacks mistreat lighter-skinned Blacks and vice-versa.

i like darkskined women...i like em all colors

I think it is unfair to say that Black men hate dark skin women. That is simply untrue. But eveyone has a type of person that they find attractive. Some like dark, some like light.

Why? Online I keep seeing posts from black men saying how lighter complected women look better, and dogging darkskin women in the process. Even black male entertainers have expressed their preferences for lightskin women. It's hard to feel attractive and date with a positive attitude when you're reminded daily that you're not the preferred type
You need to just turn your computer off as well as the idiot box and get out there to the jazz clubs, the basketball games, the Black book signings and theDemocratic club in your area

AND GET OFF THE STEROTYPE PROPAGANDA POSTED BY FOLKS WHOSE RACE AND SEX YOU DONT EVEN KNOW, AND GET OUT THEE AND MINGLE AND DOGGONEIT SEE FOR YOURSELF THE FACT THAT

BROTHERS OF ALL SHADES ARE CRAZY ABOUT DARK SKIN SISTERS,

AND THEIR SMOOTHER THEN BUTTER ,
SOFTER THEN COTTON SKIN

GIVING A VERY DARK SKIN SISTER MULTIPLE ORGASMS IS THE BLACK MAN'S HEAVEN

this thread again?
sheer foolishness.....

one love
khasm

It's their preference. There are just as many, if not more, Black men who prefer dark skinned women. How else do you explain the existence of so many dark skinned Black people to begin with?

I don't think this is true, but ya'll can come to puerto rico - we'll eatcha up!
venga 'pa que tu vea!

If monogamy were not the norm, it would be much easier to appreciate the diversity of Black women.