Peace and Blessings Family,

The other night in chat, i had the pleasure of talking with several of the young people in the community, and they wanted to talk about people meeting online, and then having sex. They seemed to be a bit surprised that it really happens, and ... well ... i thought it was a good topic and shared some information i have on it. As you can see, i think it's worthy of a discussion thread as well.

As i shared with the Family on that night, i have been online since 1996 and with all the folk i've interacted with over the years, all the folk i've had the opportunity to meet and have sex with ... i've never done this. I think i'm probably way too cautious, protective of my body and self, and thus, not easily able to give myself in this way. Having sex, for me, is no nonchalant act, that can be taken lightly by my heart and Spirit. And so, i've never had sex with anyone i met online. It could be said, well Destee, you aint have'n no whole bunch of sex with folk not met online, which is true. So my living this way is no great big stretch for me.

I remember in the early days of getting online, people were meeting and having sex. They'd come back online and talk about it! They'd share intimate details, that usually consisted of their heart being broken, the man really only wanting sex from the woman, but telling her everything she wanted to hear, in order to get it, and her believing it all ... until after she gave up her sex ... and found out that he was saying and doing the same with many other women.

I remember the Sisters crying and being so hurt. So much drama. The fighting that was going on between what had just been lovers. It was amazing to me. It gave me to know that i need to be very very cautious, even more so online, than i was offline.

I remember my first online crush, if you will. This Brother was courting me, and had me believing every word he said. I had planned on meeting him, and considering the context of the relationship, we would have probably had sex. But prior to our meeting, another Sister shows up and tells me (and everyone within earshot) that the two of them had just spent the weekend together. That they had had unprotected sex and were in love. I was devastated. Devastated, but also grateful to God, that it all came out before i allowed this man inside my body. Keep in mind, this was years ago, probably around 1997, but it set the tone for how i'd approach such relationships in the future.

On the Internet, a person can tell you anything you want to hear. Some people have become Masters at doing just this. They know exactly what a woman or man wants to hear, and they feed that to them, hook, line, and sinker. If you are gullible, vulnerable, weak, or just plain not careful, you too can end up this way. I believe it can happen to anyone, including myself, so please, just be careful. I remember a dear friend of mine, Brother ClarKint, who coined the phrase to me back then surrounding this very topic ... "The Internet is not for the weak or faint of heart." He said this more than 10 years ago, as we talked of those being devastated, and i remember it still.

There are so many horror stories out here. There was a man in Kansas that lured young women to his home, and killed them, put them in barrels, and buried them in his backyard, all orchestrated from right here on the Internet.

I remember a Sister that came to us (the chat room ... not destee, but another), crying and begging the women in the room to please not take her husband from her. It was so sad. She had found information that confirmed he was having an affair with some woman or women that he'd met online, and because she obviously couldn't trust him, she put her hope and trust into all the women he may come in contact with. Talk about devastated, now she was really devastated. It was so sad, my heart really went out to her. Here her husband was, on the net, cheating on her ... while she's home loving him, and her Family so dearly, willing to beg people she did not even know, to help her sustain her marriage. Sad isn't even the word ... but this too helped form my thoughts regarding men on the net, and what could be considered my complicit behavior, should i entertain men that were married or already with someone. The possible pain i could cause another, not even aware.

We all know the story, the man or woman says they are married or involved, but not happy. They go on and on about how their significant other doesn't satisfy them, respect them, please them, etc. How they are separated, getting a divorce, all of that ... only to get you in their bed (or whatever other motive they may have).

Before i go too far, let me say too ... that it's not just Men doing Women ... but Women are out here doing men too! Wives are cheating on husbands, with men they've met online, just like husbands are cheating on wives! I've heard a few stories where the Men got hoodwinked, bamboozled, and led astray as well. Women that have several different men, talking to them all, saying the same things to each, that they are saying to you. It's called multi-tasking, and when they have their instant / private message window open to you, they are also talking to others at the same time, saying the same thing, and you don't have a clue.

I realize this thread has a female slant, and that's because i am female ... :) ... and so the stories i hear, are often from the female side of things. This is not intentional, it's just what i have to share. So Men please, don't take it personal, for i am well aware that you are as able to be taken advantage of, as women are.

Another thing i mentioned to the young people in chat the other night, was the naked pictures and video cam sessions that one can partake in. While this isn't sex, it is often a precursor to it, and it alone can land you in lots of trouble. There was a Sister that i knew, that was in love with a man she met online. They were close, talked every day, it was great. She shared naked pictures of herself with him, even posed naked on cam, opening up her body to his view (and playing inside of it for him). She didn't know he was capturing every single one of those images on cam, saving them to his hard drive. She only found out after they "broke up" and he shared those images with everyone that he knew! Her whole entire naked body was on display for the entire world! I saw her whole body, all inside of it and everything! This is the man that she once trusted so much, to give of herself to him in this way, and this is what he did to her. My heart hurt for her. Even now though, i must say, i still see her on occasion, and she's still out here, as though nothing ever happened. I guess she's trying to be strong, face life head on, all of that ... but whew Lawd!

One tell-tale sign for me, is if a man will share such pictures of other women he has, with me. It gives me to know that he will also share my pictures with others. Why would he consider me more greatly than he does the woman who already shared herself with him?!! So be careful who you give your stuff to!

Another thing you may want to take note of, is how quickly (after getting to know them), are they asking you to visit them? Are they in a real big hurry to meet, after the two of you have met online and fell in love? In most cases, i've found that if this is their goal, to simply be inside your body, they won't waste a whole lot of time doing much else. It will be the focus of their conversation, for there are too many people out here willing to satisfy their needs, to waste too much time on you. Which of course has always been fine with me. I'd much rather a man go on, and be inside some other woman, if that was his goal anyway.

In closing, i'd like to say, that i have also met people who met online, married, had children, and hopefully are still living happily ever after. I do believe it can happen, but it's not the norm by any stretch of the imagination. You probably have better odds at winning your state lottery.

I realize as well, that some people are very comfortable with having sex with anyone, and it's no big deal to them. If you are made like that, willing to give your body to whoever wants it, then the Internet is the place for you! And actually, there's nothing wrong with doing what you want with your body, so i do not stand in judgment of it. But for those who hold themselves and their bodies in high esteem, not willing to let any and everyone partake of it ... be very careful finding your next lover from online!

As a matter of fact, i'd ask them ... how many people have you already had sex with, that you met online. That is something i'd want to know, even if they had to lie, for surely, most won't say i had sex with 99 people from online already!

So be very careful!

Love You!

:heart:

Destee

I attempted marriage with someone I met online. Sex is a given in that situation.

Peace and Blessings Family,

The other night in chat, i had the pleasure of talking with several of the young people in the community, and they wanted to talk about people meeting online, and then having sex. They seemed to be a bit surprised that it really happens, and ... well ... i thought it was a good topic and shared some information i have on it. As you can see, i think it's worthy of a discussion thread as well.

As i shared with the Family on that night, i have been online since 1996 and with all the folk i've interacted with over the years, all the folk i've had the opportunity to meet and have sex with ... i've never done this. I think i'm probably way too cautious, protective of my body and self, and thus, not easily able to give myself in this way. Having sex, for me, is no nonchalant act, that can be taken lightly by my heart and Spirit. And so, i've never had sex with anyone i met online. It could be said, well Destee, you aint have'n no whole bunch of sex with folk not met online, which is true. So my living this way is no great big stretch for me.

I remember in the early days of getting online, people were meeting and having sex. They'd come back online and talk about it! They'd share intimate details, that usually consisted of their heart being broken, the man really only wanting sex from the woman, but telling her everything she wanted to hear, in order to get it, and her believing it all ... until after she gave up her sex ... and found out that he was saying and doing the same with many other women.

I remember the Sisters crying and being so hurt. So much drama. The fighting that was going on between what had just been lovers. It was amazing to me. It gave me to know that i need to be very very cautious, even more so online, than i was offline.

I remember my first online crush, if you will. This Brother was courting me, and had me believing every word he said. I had planned on meeting him, and considering the context of the relationship, we would have probably had sex. But prior to our meeting, another Sister shows up and tells me (and everyone within earshot) that the two of them had just spent the weekend together. That they had had unprotected sex and were in love. I was devastated. Devastated, but also grateful to God, that it all came out before i allowed this man inside my body. Keep in mind, this was years ago, probably around 1997, but it set the tone for how i'd approach such relationships in the future.

On the Internet, a person can tell you anything you want to hear. Some people have become Masters at doing just this. They know exactly what a woman or man wants to hear, and they feed that to them, hook, line, and sinker. If you are gullible, vulnerable, weak, or just plain not careful, you too can end up this way. I believe it can happen to anyone, including myself, so please, just be careful. I remember a dear friend of mine, Brother ClarKint, who coined the phrase to me back then surrounding this very topic ... "The Internet is not for the weak or faint of heart." He said this more than 10 years ago, as we talked of those being devastated, and i remember it still.

There are so many horror stories out here. There was a man in Kansas that lured young women to his home, and killed them, put them in barrels, and buried them in his backyard, all orchestrated from right here on the Internet.

I remember a Sister that came to us (the chat room ... not destee, but another), crying and begging the women in the room to please not take her husband from her. It was so sad. She had found information that confirmed he was having an affair with some woman or women that he'd met online, and because she obviously couldn't trust him, she put her hope and trust into all the women he may come in contact with. Talk about devastated, now she was really devastated. It was so sad, my heart really went out to her. Here her husband was, on the net, cheating on her ... while she's home loving him, and her Family so dearly, willing to beg people she did not even know, to help her sustain her marriage. Sad isn't even the word ... but this too helped form my thoughts regarding men on the net, and what could be considered my complicit behavior, should i entertain men that were married or already with someone. The possible pain i could cause another, not even aware.

We all know the story, the man or woman says they are married or involved, but not happy. They go on and on about how their significant other doesn't satisfy them, respect them, please them, etc. How they are separated, getting a divorce, all of that ... only to get you in their bed (or whatever other motive they may have).

Before i go too far, let me say too ... that it's not just Men doing Women ... but Women are out here doing men too! Wives are cheating on husbands, with men they've met online, just like husbands are cheating on wives! I've heard a few stories where the Men got hoodwinked, bamboozled, and led astray as well. Women that have several different men, talking to them all, saying the same things to each, that they are saying to you. It's called multi-tasking, and when they have their instant / private message window open to you, they are also talking to others at the same time, saying the same thing, and you don't have a clue.

I realize this thread has a female slant, and that's because i am female ... :) ... and so the stories i hear, are often from the female side of things. This is not intentional, it's just what i have to share. So Men please, don't take it personal, for i am well aware that you are as able to be taken advantage of, as women are.

Another thing i mentioned to the young people in chat the other night, was the naked pictures and video cam sessions that one can partake in. While this isn't sex, it is often a precursor to it, and it alone can land you in lots of trouble. There was a Sister that i knew, that was in love with a man she met online. They were close, talked every day, it was great. She shared naked pictures of herself with him, even posed naked on cam, opening up her body to his view (and playing inside of it for him). She didn't know he was capturing every single one of those images on cam, saving them to his hard drive. She only found out after they "broke up" and he shared those images with everyone that he knew! Her whole entire naked body was on display for the entire world! I saw her whole body, all inside of it and everything! This is the man that she once trusted so much, to give of herself to him in this way, and this is what he did to her. My heart hurt for her. Even now though, i must say, i still see her on occasion, and she's still out here, as though nothing ever happened. I guess she's trying to be strong, face life head on, all of that ... but whew Lawd!

One tell-tale sign for me, is if a man will share such pictures of other women he has, with me. It gives me to know that he will also share my pictures with others. Why would he consider me more greatly than he does the woman who already shared herself with him?!! So be careful who you give your stuff to!

Another thing you may want to take note of, is how quickly (after getting to know them), are they asking you to visit them? Are they in a real big hurry to meet, after the two of you have met online and fell in love? In most cases, i've found that if this is their goal, to simply be inside your body, they won't waste a whole lot of time doing much else. It will be the focus of their conversation, for there are too many people out here willing to satisfy their needs, to waste too much time on you. Which of course has always been fine with me. I'd much rather a man go on, and be inside some other woman, if that was his goal anyway.

In closing, i'd like to say, that i have also met people who met online, married, had children, and hopefully are still living happily ever after. I do believe it can happen, but it's not the norm by any stretch of the imagination. You probably have better odds at winning your state lottery.

I realize as well, that some people are very comfortable with having sex with anyone, and it's no big deal to them. If you are made like that, willing to give your body to whoever wants it, then the Internet is the place for you! And actually, there's nothing wrong with doing what you want with your body, so i do not stand in judgment of it. But for those who hold themselves and their bodies in high esteem, not willing to let any and everyone partake of it ... be very careful finding your next lover from online!

As a matter of fact, i'd ask them ... how many people have you already had sex with, that you met online. That is something i'd want to know, even if they had to lie, for surely, most won't say i had sex with 99 people from online already!

So be very careful!

Love You!

:heart:

Desteesex???i'm still tryin to figure out how to send an e-mail.

I agree that this is a very big issue when dealing with chatting online. People will feed you a bunch of trash thinking they are going to get next to you. I have had people make advances towards me before but im glad i have the will power to ignore those advances and limit my online interaction. Its sad that some people let these predators get to them because they feel that the person truely cares about them. In any relationship on and offline people can pretend to be something they are not and have hidden agendas. However online your taking a much bigger gamble because you never know who or what is on the other end of that chat box. So I encourage all people; men, woman, young, old, married, single, and desperate to practice caution. The internet can be a great opportunity to met all sorts of people from around the world. But, unfortunately you have those people who lose the purpose of things and take all the fun out of something that can be a wonderful experience.
And lol @ Oldiesman @ still tryna figure out how to send an email..

No, I never had sex with anyone I met online. What sent the redflagsaflaring for me was when I met this one guy online. He seemed very nice at first (mind you) I was very new to the computers and the Internet at the time. After a few times of us IMing each other he began to get a little too personal. He started asking me "what I was wearing (which I thought was very innocent), to I want you so bad." smh Then he starting asking me to have phone sex with him, but over the IM. I can't recall the exact word he called it, but it was like phone sex. Gurrrl, immediately I dropped that cat and formed an opinion that meeting anyone over the Internet can be very dangerous. Here I thought I was speaking to a well rounded man to find out what he really needed was a sex hot-line. It wasn't his sexuality that alarmed me though, it was the manner in which he felt it was okay to jump to such a bold assertion after only talking with me on a few occasions.

Now, this is only one example as there have been many who used this approach for personal gratification. Although I think phone sex is a lot safer than actually getting physical with someone, but for a women or man who's seeking a good reliable responsible mate, they need to be very cautious. Especially when meeting someone online because over the Internet your only source of communicating is through text. More than likely, your friends won't meet this person. You won't run into other people who know this person personally, and you won't see how this person interacts with other people/friends.

But technically, letting anyone in your body should be exercised with caution rather in real life or online. Meeting new people you can never be sure of ones intent. The only reliable intent you have to rely on is your own. So be good to yourself. At some point in life we will all have regrets. Why not make it be at least as possible. Protect yourself and be safe!

:heart:

Peace and Blessings Family,

The other night in chat, i had the pleasure of talking with several of the young people in the community, and they wanted to talk about people meeting online, and then having sex. They seemed to be a bit surprised that it really happens, and ... well ... i thought it was a good topic and shared some information i have on it. As you can see, i think it's worthy of a discussion thread as well.

As i shared with the Family on that night, i have been online since 1996 and with all the folk i've interacted with over the years, all the folk i've had the opportunity to meet and have sex with ... i've never done this. I think i'm probably way too cautious, protective of my body and self, and thus, not easily able to give myself in this way. Having sex, for me, is no nonchalant act, that can be taken lightly by my heart and Spirit. And so, i've never had sex with anyone i met online. It could be said, well Destee, you aint have'n no whole bunch of sex with folk not met online, which is true. So my living this way is no great big stretch for me.

I remember in the early days of getting online, people were meeting and having sex. They'd come back online and talk about it! They'd share intimate details, that usually consisted of their heart being broken, the man really only wanting sex from the woman, but telling her everything she wanted to hear, in order to get it, and her believing it all ... until after she gave up her sex ... and found out that he was saying and doing the same with many other women.

I remember the Sisters crying and being so hurt. So much drama. The fighting that was going on between what had just been lovers. It was amazing to me. It gave me to know that i need to be very very cautious, even more so online, than i was offline.

I remember my first online crush, if you will. This Brother was courting me, and had me believing every word he said. I had planned on meeting him, and considering the context of the relationship, we would have probably had sex. But prior to our meeting, another Sister shows up and tells me (and everyone within earshot) that the two of them had just spent the weekend together. That they had had unprotected sex and were in love. I was devastated. Devastated, but also grateful to God, that it all came out before i allowed this man inside my body. Keep in mind, this was years ago, probably around 1997, but it set the tone for how i'd approach such relationships in the future.

On the Internet, a person can tell you anything you want to hear. Some people have become Masters at doing just this. They know exactly what a woman or man wants to hear, and they feed that to them, hook, line, and sinker. If you are gullible, vulnerable, weak, or just plain not careful, you too can end up this way. I believe it can happen to anyone, including myself, so please, just be careful. I remember a dear friend of mine, Brother ClarKint, who coined the phrase to me back then surrounding this very topic ... "The Internet is not for the weak or faint of heart." He said this more than 10 years ago, as we talked of those being devastated, and i remember it still.

There are so many horror stories out here. There was a man in Kansas that lured young women to his home, and killed them, put them in barrels, and buried them in his backyard, all orchestrated from right here on the Internet.

I remember a Sister that came to us (the chat room ... not destee, but another), crying and begging the women in the room to please not take her husband from her. It was so sad. She had found information that confirmed he was having an affair with some woman or women that he'd met online, and because she obviously couldn't trust him, she put her hope and trust into all the women he may come in contact with. Talk about devastated, now she was really devastated. It was so sad, my heart really went out to her. Here her husband was, on the net, cheating on her ... while she's home loving him, and her Family so dearly, willing to beg people she did not even know, to help her sustain her marriage. Sad isn't even the word ... but this too helped form my thoughts regarding men on the net, and what could be considered my complicit behavior, should i entertain men that were married or already with someone. The possible pain i could cause another, not even aware.

We all know the story, the man or woman says they are married or involved, but not happy. They go on and on about how their significant other doesn't satisfy them, respect them, please them, etc. How they are separated, getting a divorce, all of that ... only to get you in their bed (or whatever other motive they may have).

Before i go too far, let me say too ... that it's not just Men doing Women ... but Women are out here doing men too! Wives are cheating on husbands, with men they've met online, just like husbands are cheating on wives! I've heard a few stories where the Men got hoodwinked, bamboozled, and led astray as well. Women that have several different men, talking to them all, saying the same things to each, that they are saying to you. It's called multi-tasking, and when they have their instant / private message window open to you, they are also talking to others at the same time, saying the same thing, and you don't have a clue.

I realize this thread has a female slant, and that's because i am female ... :) ... and so the stories i hear, are often from the female side of things. This is not intentional, it's just what i have to share. So Men please, don't take it personal, for i am well aware that you are as able to be taken advantage of, as women are.

Another thing i mentioned to the young people in chat the other night, was the naked pictures and video cam sessions that one can partake in. While this isn't sex, it is often a precursor to it, and it alone can land you in lots of trouble. There was a Sister that i knew, that was in love with a man she met online. They were close, talked every day, it was great. She shared naked pictures of herself with him, even posed naked on cam, opening up her body to his view (and playing inside of it for him). She didn't know he was capturing every single one of those images on cam, saving them to his hard drive. She only found out after they "broke up" and he shared those images with everyone that he knew! Her whole entire naked body was on display for the entire world! I saw her whole body, all inside of it and everything! This is the man that she once trusted so much, to give of herself to him in this way, and this is what he did to her. My heart hurt for her. Even now though, i must say, i still see her on occasion, and she's still out here, as though nothing ever happened. I guess she's trying to be strong, face life head on, all of that ... but whew Lawd!

One tell-tale sign for me, is if a man will share such pictures of other women he has, with me. It gives me to know that he will also share my pictures with others. Why would he consider me more greatly than he does the woman who already shared herself with him?!! So be careful who you give your stuff to!

Another thing you may want to take note of, is how quickly (after getting to know them), are they asking you to visit them? Are they in a real big hurry to meet, after the two of you have met online and fell in love? In most cases, i've found that if this is their goal, to simply be inside your body, they won't waste a whole lot of time doing much else. It will be the focus of their conversation, for there are too many people out here willing to satisfy their needs, to waste too much time on you. Which of course has always been fine with me. I'd much rather a man go on, and be inside some other woman, if that was his goal anyway.

In closing, i'd like to say, that i have also met people who met online, married, had children, and hopefully are still living happily ever after. I do believe it can happen, but it's not the norm by any stretch of the imagination. You probably have better odds at winning your state lottery.

I realize as well, that some people are very comfortable with having sex with anyone, and it's no big deal to them. If you are made like that, willing to give your body to whoever wants it, then the Internet is the place for you! And actually, there's nothing wrong with doing what you want with your body, so i do not stand in judgment of it. But for those who hold themselves and their bodies in high esteem, not willing to let any and everyone partake of it ... be very careful finding your next lover from online!

As a matter of fact, i'd ask them ... how many people have you already had sex with, that you met online. That is something i'd want to know, even if they had to lie, for surely, most won't say i had sex with 99 people from online already!

So be very careful!

Love You!

:heart:

Destee



:love::em3600::10300::smooch::yawn:

Uh, what did you have in mind?

Thank You Brother Edward Williams, Sister YungMiss, and Sister Purple, for sharing your thoughts on this topic.

Ohhhh and Brother Oldiesman too ... :lol: ... that was funneeee ... you're so silly! :)

Kemetstry ... what are you talking about ... :hammer:

:heart:

Destee

Ohhhh i also wanted to say ... Sister Purple, in regard to the phone sex stuff, i'd imagine folk should be careful about that too ... as you'd never know if someone was recording you. Yes Yes Yes ... we just gotta be careful at every turn ... never knowing the very one we are trusting, is the one that will break our hearts.

Love You!

:heart:

Destee

I have meet and engaged in intercourse w/ only one female that I've meet online. However, quiet as it's kept, well before I get into that I'd just like to state for the record that I haven't been getting at females online since 2004, so I don't know if it's the same now, but a lot of females who engage in sexual acts with guys they meet online make the initial offer, and many of the females who have sex with guys they've meet online go on these sites specifically looking for "sex with no strings attached" kind of interactions. A lot of the younger guys understood that so now the internet meeting spots became full of people who just wanted to do the deed, w/ no commitment. I don't really know about older men, but I suspect they have the same intention as well.

FYI, here some of the sites me and some guys from back in the day used to get females from. Just go there and search some of these girl's profiles. **SMH**

www.localhookupz.com
www.sconex.com
chat.aim.com (http://chat.aim.com)
www.teenchat.com (http://www.teenchat.com/chat/hangouts/)

I have meet and engaged in intercourse w/ only one female that I've meet online. However, quiet as it's kept, well before I get into that I'd just like to state for the record that I haven't been getting at females online since 2004, so I don't know if it's the same now, but a lot of females who engage in sexual acts with guys they meet online make the initial offer, and many of the females who have sex with guys they've meet online go on these sites specifically looking for "sex with no strings attached" kind of interactions. A lot of the younger guys understood that so now the internet meeting spots became full of people who just wanted to do the deed, w/ no commitment. I don't really know about older men, but I suspect they have the same intention as well.

FYI, here some of the sites me and some guys from back in the day used to get females from. Just go there and search some of these girl's profiles. **SMH**

www.localhookupz.com
www.sconex.com
chat.aim.com (http://chat.aim.com)
www.teenchat.com (http://www.teenchat.com/chat/hangouts/)

Brother Asafo ... you bring up a very interesting point, one that i've witnessed myself, and have been left in mild astonishment!

Sisters (because most of my online time has been spent primarily with Black People) can be so forward and aggressive! Oh My Gosh! I've been like ... whoa! They give themselves away! You're right, they make it very clear what they want, and are more than willing to pay the cost to get there, or do whatever they need to, to have sex with a man they hardly know. It really blows my mind.

I remember having this conversation with a Brother once, astonished at how Sisters throw themselves at the Brothers. I know i know i know ... i play around, talk stuff, carry on ... but this that i'm talking about is way different! They actually follow through, in 3.5 seconds, and their vagina is open and ready! It's frightening because this technology is so new, and our babies are growing up in it, and the examples are terrible!

As a Sister, i must say, Brothers are not all that aggressive. I've not had that problem anyway, though it could be simply that no one wanted me like that ... but no matter ... i've never witnessed such aggressive, forward interaction from Brothers, that i've seen Sisters demonstrate on occasion.

It could be that Brothers don't have to be, with Sisters giving up their stuff so easily.

But if i were a Brother, trying to talk to a Sister, i'd be scared if she was trying to pour the coochie on me! :eeek:

Yes Brother Asafo, i've seen some of what you speak of, and it's sad to me.

Thanks for sharing.

:heart:

Destee

Thank You Brother Edward Williams, Sister YungMiss, and Sister Purple, for sharing your thoughts on this topic.

Ohhhh and Brother Oldiesman too ... :lol: ... that was funneeee ... you're so silly! :)

Kemetstry ... what are you talking about ... :hammer:

:heart:

Destee



*snickering*

*snickering*

Kemetstry ... before this goes any further, i'm gonna need to know how many women you've already had sex with, from online ... QQ

:heart:

Destee

Kemetstry ... before this goes any further, i'm gonna need to know how many women you've already had sex with, from online ... QQ

:heart:

Destee


:10400: We can bot get tested :em3700:

:10400: We can bot get tested :em3700:

:lol: ... hahahahahaha ... oh gosh ... i'm gonna need a number, because it can be too high, where a test won't make any difference ... i mean, you could be a serial internet sexer ... moving from woman to woman ... just wanting another notch in your belt ... :lol:

Could i get that number please ... :lol:

:heart:

Destee

I'm confused.

Are you asking if we have had sex with people we've met online or are you asking if we meet people for the only intent of having sex?

I'm confused.

Are you asking if we have had sex with people we've met online or are you asking if we meet people for the only intent of having sex?

I'm asking if you've ever met anyone online, then met offline, and had sex ... no matter the intent.

:heart:

Destee

Brother Asafo ... you bring up a very interesting point, one that i've witnessed myself, and have been left in mild astonishment!

Sisters (because most of my online time has been spent primarily with Black People) can be so forward and aggressive! Oh My Gosh! I've been like ... whoa! They give themselves away! You're right, they make it very clear what they want, and are more than willing to pay the cost to get there, or do whatever they need to, to have sex with a man they hardly know. It really blows my mind.

I remember having this conversation with a Brother once, astonished at how Sisters throw themselves at the Brothers. I know i know i know ... i play around, talk stuff, carry on ... but this that i'm talking about is way different! They actually follow through, in 3.5 seconds, and their vagina is open and ready! It's frightening because this technology is so new, and our babies are growing up in it, and the examples are terrible!

As a Sister, i must say, Brothers are not all that aggressive. I've not had that problem anyway, though it could be simply that no one wanted me like that ... but no matter ... i've never witnessed such aggressive, forward interaction from Brothers, that i've seen Sisters demonstrate on occasion.

It could be that Brothers don't have to be, with Sisters giving up their stuff so easily.

But if i were a Brother, trying to talk to a Sister, i'd be scared if she was trying to pour the coochie on me! :eeek:

Yes Brother Asafo, i've seen some of what you speak of, and it's sad to me.

Thanks for sharing.

:heart:

Destee

I ain't skeerreed...

I ain't skeerreed...

:lol: ... where is my cup ... hold on one second ... :wink:

:heart:

Destee

:lol: ... where is my cup ... hold on one second ... :wink:

:heart:

Destee

Grab your cup and holla (a word that describes abusive interaction in most cases that non-white people use to describe how we interact with each other) back at me.

Grab your cup and holla (a word that describes abusive interaction in most cases that non-white people use to describe how we interact with each other) back at me.

lol ... don't even try it ... you aint called me yet, got me out here look'n all desperate and stuff ... talk'n 'bout holla ... :rolleyes:

I know when i've been rejected Brother Edward Williams, and you do it oh so well! :love:

:heart:

Destee

:lol: ... hahahahahaha ... oh gosh ... i'm gonna need a number, because it can be too high, where a test won't make any difference ... i mean, you could be a serial internet sexer ... moving from woman to woman ... just wanting another notch in your belt ... :lol:

Could i get that number please ... :lol:

:heart:

Destee



:qqb005: Seems I'm the one that needs to take a number

:qqb005: Seems I'm the one that needs to take a number

when have you ever stood back ... waited ... took a number ... ?? ... please ... :lol:

maybe the new Members might believe that, but you know i know better!

:heart:

Destee

Brothers Kemetstry and Edward Williams ... yall both need to be still ... and you know i know it!

I've known each of you for a very long time, and aint neither one of yall ever tried to talk to me ... so quit it!

I don't know why yall are carrying on now ... try'n to turn me into a stalker ... but you'd best be careful! :love:

Mess around and look out your window, and find me stare'n at you ... :lol:

:heart:

Destee

I'm asking if you've ever met anyone online, then met offline, and had sex ... no matter the intent.

:heart:

Destee

My last couple of 'relationships' were with men I had met online so yeah. Although I have not gone online purposefully looking to hook up.

i repeat i didn't have "sexual relations" with that girl!?!?!?!?!?!?!

:em2700::qqb007:

i repeat i didn't have "sexual relations" with that girl!?!?!?!?!?!?!

:em2700::qqb007:

me neither.........:SuN019:

I've had sex with people I've met off the internet when I was teenager and a lil older. I'm near my mid twenties so I don't do that anymore . . . as of yet.

As long as you and the person got a good vibe and you've established a level of familiarity and it's consensual, go with the flow.

for myself, I'm pretty old fashioned. I want to meet people in person, not over a machine where they can "market" an image and mask to me. Part of my reluctance to meet anyone online is my reliance on intuition, synchronicity and purpose, which I think are not clear when on the internet.

Even most recently, there was a spiritual guide that I sought advice from, having found her online. Her site seems solid, and her popularity quite large, but in the course of a few discussions I discerned that this "guidance" was not the authentic source I was seeking, and that I needed to look within rather than to others.... Luckily, the involvement cost me very little in time and money.


Also, I really don't like giving up personal information to anyone, but especially a man before I get all the background check on him first. Too many people seem to be very very open on this mode of communication and that makes me defensive. I believe that we all need to protect ourselves better, by not revealing to others the information that can be used to turn your life upside down - and that means everything from income, to past traumas, to addresses, employment locations, number of children, etc....

A sociopath, and true predator knows how to info-mine just what he needs to manipulate and control you based on your strengths and weaknesses. So many womben and men are conned out of their money, their credit, and their safety because they were too trusting.

My dad used to tell me when I was young not to trust people based on appearances. A man could wear a good suit, speak well, drive a fancy car and still be a totally scum bag. Ah, the wisdom of the elders....

I was dating someone though who got involved with another woman he met on a dating site. It was hurtful for everyone. I don't trust IM, dating sites, etc.... In fact I took down pictures of myself from myspace site because I don't want unsolicited attention from men seeking a sex partner.

When we (on Destee) were discussing that young woman who was 13 and posed herself as a 19 year old, what frazzled my mind was that two people decided to meet from the internet, see each other on a street corner and sleep together! UUUGGGHHHHHH!!!!!

Womben and men need to protect themselves from potential predators. And really, if the person comes from a foreign community / area/ country they have no reliable references in which you can use. References are good, they aren't always 100%, but they can help. There's an old West Indian saying about being wary of fish from strange waters.

So many people are seeking intimacy (in-to-me-see) but confusing it with sex. I say save a nation, keep your sacred areas sacred, and open your heart and mind rather than your bodies first!

Much luv

Brothers Kemetstry and Edward Williams ... yall both need to be still ... and you know i know it!

I've known each of you for a very long time, and aint neither one of yall ever tried to talk to me ... so quit it!

I don't know why yall are carrying on now ... try'n to turn me into a stalker ... but you'd best be careful! :love:

Mess around and look out your window, and find me stare'n at you ... :lol:

:heart:

Destee



:deal::yawn::em3600:

*BOOKINN My FLIGHT TO MOBILE!*

:deal::yawn::em3600:

*BOOKINN My FLIGHT TO MOBILE!*

lol Kemetstry ... you're so krazee ... :love:

oh wait ... i still need that number ... :)

:heart:

Destee

lol Kemetstry ... you're so krazee ... :love:

oh wait ... i still need that number ... :)

:heart:

Destee


I'll give it to you when I get there. Wear something nice :bellyd: for me :shades:

I'll give it to you when I get there. Wear something nice :bellyd: for me :shades:

Does this mean i've been given a sweet potato pie exemption ? ... :look:

I think we're gonna need a contract (signed in blood), in order to go further ... :blush:

:heart:

Destee

Does this mean i've been given a sweet potato pie exemption ? ... :look:

I think we're gonna need a contract (signed in blood), in order to go further ... :blush:

:heart:

Destee



:qqb026::SuN038:

No! You still have to cook that pie, every good as granny use to :darts:

How did i miss this one , I never really thought much on this matter in the past and
yes i have met a few women from the net beyond any sexual acts because it wasn't
in the plan at the time , but i had my chances as well .....I don't listen to much what
is said from the net because people lie / give false statements and so forth and i didn't
want to be a victim to this computer game , what's funny is you can meet a nice
mate from this thing called the net because i did at one point a very long time ago and she
was very nice , warm so it can happen.....Today's time we all may be afraid but it's no
worse then meeting on the street . you just learn from a different level....

I slept with one brother whom I felt I had a connection with. When I went to meet him the first time....I had a cousin with me who always carry protections and I let my net friend know that she was packing.

The second time we meet was business and pleasure mixed...LOL...Oh boy ....yes they both do mix sometimes...LOL!!!

Anywheew both times we meet the brother was respectful, protecting and loving!!!!!!!!!!!!

If asked would I do it again I would have to say yes if the situation persents it self in a trusting manner!

Peace!

i do remember one couple on another board that met and got married and moved down south together

I've had sex with people I've met off the internet when I was teenager and a lil older. I'm near my mid twenties so I don't do that anymore . . . as of yet.

As long as you and the person got a good vibe and you've established a level of familiarity and it's consensual, go with the flow.

Brother Kabal ... Welcome Welcome Welcome ... :wave:

I really appreciate you sharing with us, and am intrigued by the response you've given. You say that you had sex with people you've met on the Internet, when you were a teenager!? Were they teenagers you had sex with, or older people, if you don't mind sharing?

I bet many Parents reading and listening right now, would love to have some insight on this! I'm even a little surprised my own self! I'm just soooo glad i don't have teenagers on the Internet! When i asked this question, i never expected anyone to really say "yea or nay" regarding their sexual encounters on the net ... but i surely did not expect one of our young people to say yes, i did it, when i was a teenager! As a parent, that's really scary to me.

It's scary to me, for adults to be putting themselves in this situation, meeting people they don't really know, and having sex with them ... but our teenagers doing the same ... oh my! That sounds really dangerous to me, very risky.

Brother Kabal ... whew ... i didn't expect to get surprised like this.

Thank you so much for your honesty, your willingness to share, your saying these words, so the Parents reading and watching, providing examples to their children with their own behavior, can be aware of what's really going on!

Thank You Thank You Thank You !!! :bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown:

:heart:

Destee

:qqb026::SuN038:

No! You still have to cook that pie, every good as granny use to :darts:

Remember ... we solved the pie problem last night in chat ... agreeing to no longer discuss it in public ... :love:

:heart:

Destee

i do remember one couple on another board that met and got married and moved down south together

Yes Brother James ... we've had Members from here, meet, marry, have children, all of that! :D :toast: :D

But i think these kind of endings, to online sexual encournters, is the exception, and not the rule.

:heart:

Destee

Remember ... we solved the pie problem last night in chat ... agreeing to no longer discuss it in public ... :love:

:heart:

Destee



:em2400::idea::em2700::deal::deal::deal: :deal::deal:

:read:I HAVE NEVER MET ANYONE ON THE INTERNET, MUCH LESS HAVE SEX WITH THEM TOO.. NO, NO, NO, THAT IS NOT MY STYLE AT ALL. IN FACT, BEING HERE ON DESTEE IS THE FIRST REAL INTERACTION THAT I HAVE HAD WITH REAL PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET... ALTHOUGH THIS IS ALL FUN AND ALL, I KEEP THIS IN PERSPECTIVE! IM A HUGE FLIRT ANYWAY, I REALLY JUST CONSIDER IT TO BE INNOCENT. I DONT MEAN ANYTHING BY IT, AND I DONT MAKE IT OUT TO BE ANYTHING OTHER THAN WHAT IT IS. I HAVE NEVER HAD A PROBLEM GETTIN A MAN AND KEEPING ONE. SO INTERNET DATING AND MATING NEVER CROSSED MY MIND. I WOULD LIKE TO THINK OF MYSELF AS NOT BEING TOO UPTIGHT. I WORK WITH THE PUBLIC, AND I COME INTO CONTACT WITH PEOPLE FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD AND THAT IS WHAT THE INTERNET IS LIKE FOR ME. THE PUBLIC.. WITHIN THAT IN ITSELF, YOU DONT KNOW WHAT KIND OF WEIRDOS YOU MAY COME ACROSS. SO, I COME HERE, FLOW, START A THREAD, POST, COMMENT, FLIRT THEN TURN THE COMPUTER OFF AND GO TO BED, NUFF SAID

REAL INTERACTION THAT I HAVE HAD WITH REAL PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET...
:10900: so you think this is real? ha ha

:10900: so you think this is real? ha ha

NO, I DONT THINK THIS IS THE REAL DEAL HOLYFILED, MY DEAR.... WHAT I MEANT WAS INTERACTING WITH PEOPLE, LIVE AND DIRECT ON THE INTERNET. I NORMALLY USE THE INTERNET FOR RESEARCH AND PAYING BILLS. I DONT USUALLY HAVE INTERACTIONS DOING THOSE THINGS...
ARE WE CLEAR ON THAT?

...ARE WE CLEAR ON THAT?
:qqb021:yes mamm, is you gona spank me now?

:qqb021:yes mamm, is you gona spank me now?

YEA, I KNOW YOU WANT ME TOO! (LOL) ;) BEND OVA POPPIE:whip:

Not Yet :SuN038:I have no :deal:

Peace and Blessings Family,

The other night in chat, i had the pleasure of talking with several of the young people in the community, and they wanted to talk about people meeting online, and then having sex. They seemed to be a bit surprised that it really happens, and ... well ... i thought it was a good topic and shared some information i have on it. As you can see, i think it's worthy of a discussion thread as well.

As i shared with the Family on that night, i have been online since 1996 and with all the folk i've interacted with over the years, all the folk i've had the opportunity to meet and have sex with ... i've never done this. I think i'm probably way too cautious, protective of my body and self, and thus, not easily able to give myself in this way. Having sex, for me, is no nonchalant act, that can be taken lightly by my heart and Spirit. And so, i've never had sex with anyone i met online. It could be said, well Destee, you aint have'n no whole bunch of sex with folk not met online, which is true. So my living this way is no great big stretch for me.

I remember in the early days of getting online, people were meeting and having sex. They'd come back online and talk about it! They'd share intimate details, that usually consisted of their heart being broken, the man really only wanting sex from the woman, but telling her everything she wanted to hear, in order to get it, and her believing it all ... until after she gave up her sex ... and found out that he was saying and doing the same with many other women.

I remember the Sisters crying and being so hurt. So much drama. The fighting that was going on between what had just been lovers. It was amazing to me. It gave me to know that i need to be very very cautious, even more so online, than i was offline.

I remember my first online crush, if you will. This Brother was courting me, and had me believing every word he said. I had planned on meeting him, and considering the context of the relationship, we would have probably had sex. But prior to our meeting, another Sister shows up and tells me (and everyone within earshot) that the two of them had just spent the weekend together. That they had had unprotected sex and were in love. I was devastated. Devastated, but also grateful to God, that it all came out before i allowed this man inside my body. Keep in mind, this was years ago, probably around 1997, but it set the tone for how i'd approach such relationships in the future.

On the Internet, a person can tell you anything you want to hear. Some people have become Masters at doing just this. They know exactly what a woman or man wants to hear, and they feed that to them, hook, line, and sinker. If you are gullible, vulnerable, weak, or just plain not careful, you too can end up this way. I believe it can happen to anyone, including myself, so please, just be careful. I remember a dear friend of mine, Brother ClarKint, who coined the phrase to me back then surrounding this very topic ... "The Internet is not for the weak or faint of heart." He said this more than 10 years ago, as we talked of those being devastated, and i remember it still.

There are so many horror stories out here. There was a man in Kansas that lured young women to his home, and killed them, put them in barrels, and buried them in his backyard, all orchestrated from right here on the Internet.

I remember a Sister that came to us (the chat room ... not destee, but another), crying and begging the women in the room to please not take her husband from her. It was so sad. She had found information that confirmed he was having an affair with some woman or women that he'd met online, and because she obviously couldn't trust him, she put her hope and trust into all the women he may come in contact with. Talk about devastated, now she was really devastated. It was so sad, my heart really went out to her. Here her husband was, on the net, cheating on her ... while she's home loving him, and her Family so dearly, willing to beg people she did not even know, to help her sustain her marriage. Sad isn't even the word ... but this too helped form my thoughts regarding men on the net, and what could be considered my complicit behavior, should i entertain men that were married or already with someone. The possible pain i could cause another, not even aware.

We all know the story, the man or woman says they are married or involved, but not happy. They go on and on about how their significant other doesn't satisfy them, respect them, please them, etc. How they are separated, getting a divorce, all of that ... only to get you in their bed (or whatever other motive they may have).

Before i go too far, let me say too ... that it's not just Men doing Women ... but Women are out here doing men too! Wives are cheating on husbands, with men they've met online, just like husbands are cheating on wives! I've heard a few stories where the Men got hoodwinked, bamboozled, and led astray as well. Women that have several different men, talking to them all, saying the same things to each, that they are saying to you. It's called multi-tasking, and when they have their instant / private message window open to you, they are also talking to others at the same time, saying the same thing, and you don't have a clue.

I realize this thread has a female slant, and that's because i am female ... :) ... and so the stories i hear, are often from the female side of things. This is not intentional, it's just what i have to share. So Men please, don't take it personal, for i am well aware that you are as able to be taken advantage of, as women are.

Another thing i mentioned to the young people in chat the other night, was the naked pictures and video cam sessions that one can partake in. While this isn't sex, it is often a precursor to it, and it alone can land you in lots of trouble. There was a Sister that i knew, that was in love with a man she met online. They were close, talked every day, it was great. She shared naked pictures of herself with him, even posed naked on cam, opening up her body to his view (and playing inside of it for him). She didn't know he was capturing every single one of those images on cam, saving them to his hard drive. She only found out after they "broke up" and he shared those images with everyone that he knew! Her whole entire naked body was on display for the entire world! I saw her whole body, all inside of it and everything! This is the man that she once trusted so much, to give of herself to him in this way, and this is what he did to her. My heart hurt for her. Even now though, i must say, i still see her on occasion, and she's still out here, as though nothing ever happened. I guess she's trying to be strong, face life head on, all of that ... but whew Lawd!

One tell-tale sign for me, is if a man will share such pictures of other women he has, with me. It gives me to know that he will also share my pictures with others. Why would he consider me more greatly than he does the woman who already shared herself with him?!! So be careful who you give your stuff to!

Another thing you may want to take note of, is how quickly (after getting to know them), are they asking you to visit them? Are they in a real big hurry to meet, after the two of you have met online and fell in love? In most cases, i've found that if this is their goal, to simply be inside your body, they won't waste a whole lot of time doing much else. It will be the focus of their conversation, for there are too many people out here willing to satisfy their needs, to waste too much time on you. Which of course has always been fine with me. I'd much rather a man go on, and be inside some other woman, if that was his goal anyway.

In closing, i'd like to say, that i have also met people who met online, married, had children, and hopefully are still living happily ever after. I do believe it can happen, but it's not the norm by any stretch of the imagination. You probably have better odds at winning your state lottery.

I realize as well, that some people are very comfortable with having sex with anyone, and it's no big deal to them. If you are made like that, willing to give your body to whoever wants it, then the Internet is the place for you! And actually, there's nothing wrong with doing what you want with your body, so i do not stand in judgment of it. But for those who hold themselves and their bodies in high esteem, not willing to let any and everyone partake of it ... be very careful finding your next lover from online!

As a matter of fact, i'd ask them ... how many people have you already had sex with, that you met online. That is something i'd want to know, even if they had to lie, for surely, most won't say i had sex with 99 people from online already!

So be very careful!

Love You!

:heart:

Destee

I like this topic.

NOPE... I've never had sex wit or gotten into a serious relationship somebody that I met online. BUT... I would not be opposed to it, or overly skeptical about it either. To me, it is basically the same thing (without the picture).

I realize that there are a lot of horror stories out there about relationships that happen on the internet, but then again... there are a lot of horror stories about relationships that happen in real life.

Most internet relationships don't work... but hell, most relationships PERIOD don't work.
I'm not sure what the exact statistics are and how they compare. I'm sure that tragedy is more likely to happen on the internet, but I feel that it comes down to common sense.

If you meet a guy online and he is on you like white on grafted rice, then red flags have to go up. I'm not tryin to diss nobody, but everyone has to ask themselves this question. "What is it about YOUR picture and YOUR 2 paragraph description that is SO MUCH MO BETTA THAN EVERYONE ELSES IN THE ENTIRE WORLD that this man would come after you and no one else?" If you can't answer this question, then chances our, he is runnin the same game on someone else. If through online convo and relationship building you CAN answer this question, then it may be more feasible to go out with him. But if somebody who you didn't know from a can of paint, approached you on the street and said the same thangs, how would you react to him? That should be taken into consideration. Don't get caught up in internet fantasy.

And same thing goes for men who get taken advantage of too. Especially speaking of some of the aggresive women online that have been talked about. I mean, if I was walkin down the street, listenin to the SOS Band and eatin some chicken, and some women tapped me on the sholder and said,

Q. " Do you want some P*****Y?"

A. "D**N, can I finish my 3 piece?"

:SuN024:

Or better yet, If some women was out somewhere in the middle of the street Half Nekkid, Shakin that A** and tryin to entice you, ANY MAN with half a brain would be cautious about "entering" THIS situation, but interestingly enough, when online, this behavior is somehow ok. But what is the difference between that women comin after you in life, or somebody pursuing you online? The same rules must always apply.

Now, on the other hand, Serena Williams came to me and said that she was going to GIVE ME SOME CHRIST (http://destee.com/forums/showthread.php?t=56162), and I started hearing my ancestors singing, and beating drums, then that would obviously be a slightly different situation. (save the period)

After all, It's always wrong to say NO to the LAWD!:10900: Straight from the Book of Negrodomas!

but that is a whole nutha thread (I may open that one later) that I won't get into at this time.
ANYWAYS.... lets get back on topic.

Most of the time, from my own experience, when I hear horror stories about the internet, I always think to myself, "Ok, now what is the moral of the story... Be skeptical of the Internet?... Or use common sense?" And the stories that I hear that DON'T fall into this category, are stories that could have just as easily happened offline.

I don't see that much of a difference. You can get kidnapped, ransacked, pimp slapped, hijacked, bushwacked and heartbroken on or offline. We need to be smart about ANY relationship we get into. That would help us all.

Brown Hornet oy my brother said it all for me here .....
the one's by you hurt and do damage moreso then the Net people do
and yes i do think we are Real here .....well i'll speak for me I AM AS REAL AS IT GET !

for "fast love", I did change my narrow mind and decide to try internet dating. I figured, I'm not meeting anyone where I live, and my social life has dwindled to a slow leak, which for a Sagittarius is a prison sentence.

But there's a lot to this subculture of internet dating. Like what do you do when you get interest from people you have no mutual interest in? Do you send a reply back, saying thank you for your interest but...., do you ignore them? It's so funny to me, how many people will reply to a picture, yet when I walk around no one ever approaches me! Afraid of rejection I guess. So, without hurting anyone's feelings, what's a nice polite way of saying no thanks online?

Any suggestions for the appropriate amount of time before you do meet someone in person? I think my summer just got better by 10 points!

for "fast love", I did change my narrow mind and decide to try internet dating. I figured, I'm not meeting anyone where I live, and my social life has dwindled to a slow leak, which for a Sagittarius is a prison sentence.

But there's a lot to this subculture of internet dating. Like what do you do when you get interest from people you have no mutual interest in? Do you send a reply back, saying thank you for your interest but...., do you ignore them? It's so funny to me, how many people will reply to a picture, yet when I walk around no one ever approaches me! Afraid of rejection I guess. So, without hurting anyone's feelings, what's a nice polite way of saying no thanks online?

Any suggestions for the appropriate amount of time before you do meet someone in person? I think my summer just got better by 10 points!


Depending on what your location is internet dating is a option if your dynamic is different than your local population.

I have never participated in any internet dating sites.

However, I did have a relationship which started online through a discussion forum I'm still a member of.

We started communicating with PMs on the site and then went to phone calls. After months of talking, we decided to meet and that friendship turned into a 3-year relationship.

The relationship level fizzled out for several reasons on both sides but the friendship is still intact.

So, the answer is "Yes, I have had sex with someone I met online."
And it was darn good too! :wink:

i am officially too old to have anything.

you people have sex?
i am officially too old to have anything.


Hmmmm.

YES....I HAVE.....THREE DIFFERENT LADIES TO BE HONEST.....I MET THEM IN YEARS 2000 , 2001 , & 2003....

YES.....IM STILL FRIENDS WITH ALL THREE AND WHAT I TREASURE THE MOST IS THAT THERE IS A MUTUAL RESPECT ........AND A MUTUAL UNDERSTANDING...

I HAVE NO REGRETS......


WARRIOR

But there's a lot to this subculture of internet dating. Like what do you do when you get interest from people you have no mutual interest in? Do you send a reply back, saying thank you for your interest but...., do you ignore them? It's so funny to me, how many people will reply to a picture, yet when I walk around no one ever approaches me! Afraid of rejection I guess. So, without hurting anyone's feelings, what's a nice polite way of saying no thanks online?


Well the best thing to do is not to join "Dating Sites" but to join "Social Networking" sites where you can meet people. That way, if someone you are not interested in makes a move, just tell them, "I'm really only on this site to "network. I'm not interested in a dating type relationship"

A lot people put that on there profiles anyway... just to scare off the scrubs (so to speak).

Then you just have hope that Mr2DMNGood doesn't catch you at the Club grindin wit BlackGod69. Might get some ugly IM's off of that. :10900:

Then you just have hope that Mr2DMNGood doesn't catch you at the Club grindin wit BlackGod69. Might get some ugly IM's off of that. :10900:

i wish i could write like you.....:geek:

Peace and Blessings Family,

I just wanted to come back and post to this, commend you all (who have had sex with someone you met online), for being so well-balanced and stuff. It makes me realize that I'm the odd one, and well, I'll just have to be that (until the cure kicks all the way in).

You all are so good, able to talk about past sexual experiences with such maturity and stuff. Oh my gosh. I'd be killing someone! How you gonna get my cat and then leave me?!! Oh No! That dog will not hunt! You will not find one man (still living) on this planet that can talk of having my sex and then moving on, there is no moving on, except to see your Maker of course ... :lol:

Oh gosh ... i think i need therapy. :eeek: I now see, there's something wrong with me.

But, after reading this thread, seeing how adult-like folk deal with situations like this ... well ... i feel cured ... and am ready to just have some sex, and will not kill you if you try to leave me.

So ... c'mon ... anyone willing to trust this ... ??? ... :nuts: ... PM Me Baby! :love:

:heart:

Destee

It makes me realize that I'm the odd one

:fyi:i been trying to tell you that for a minute.....

:fyi:i been trying to tell you that for a minute.....

lol ... now that we're on the same page ... you ready to do it ?? ... :)

:heart:

Destee

lol ... now that we're on the same page ... you ready to do it ?? ... :)

:heart:

Destee

i have retired from the field of combat

i have retired from the field of combat

dang dang dang ... just my luck ... a day late ... :bye:

Well, if you ever come out of retirement, let me know ... :luvv:

I Love You Brother James!

:heart:

Destee

Peace,

Yes I have and will. I ain't scurred.

Peace

Peace,

Yes I have and will. I ain't scurred.

Peace

Really? Aren't you afraid of false advertising and all the crazies out there? What happens if you get all attached to someone and they aren't what they said they are or walks around brandishing dirty LCD switchblades?

Peace,

Yes I have and will. I ain't scurred.

Peace

Shoooo ... i'm scared, i'll admit it ... but i'm gonna stop being scared just as soon as Brother James comes out of retirement! :)

:heart:

Destee

Peace and Blessings Family,

I just wanted to come back and post to this, commend you all (who have had sex with someone you met online), for being so well-balanced and stuff. It makes me realize that I'm the odd one, and well, I'll just have to be that (until the cure kicks all the way in).

You all are so good, able to talk about past sexual experiences with such maturity and stuff. Oh my gosh. I'd be killing someone! How you gonna get my cat and then leave me?!! Oh No! That dog will not hunt! You will not find one man (still living) on this planet that can talk of having my sex and then moving on, there is no moving on, except to see your Maker of course ... :lol:

Oh gosh ... i think i need therapy. :eeek: I now see, there's something wrong with me.

But, after reading this thread, seeing how adult-like folk deal with situations like this ... well ... i feel cured ... and am ready to just have some sex, and will not kill you if you try to leave me.

So ... c'mon ... anyone willing to trust this ... ??? ... :nuts: ... PM Me Baby! :love:

:heart:

Destee

You are so wise, fine and amazingly attractive if I
don't have the money to fly to your state and city I will rob a bank to see you,
and not give a hoot about going to jail if I get caught!:flowers::hearts4::wine::chef::hearts1::hea rts1::hearts1::hearts1::jumping::jumping::jumping: :cake::cake::hearts1::hearts1::hearts1::hearts1:

You are so wise, fine and amazingly attractive if I
don't have the money to fly to your state and city I will rob a bank to see you,
and not give a hoot about going to jail if I get caught!:flowers::hearts4::wine::chef::hearts1::hea rts1::hearts1::hearts1::jumping::jumping::jumping: :cake::cake::hearts1::hearts1::hearts1::hearts1:

Oh My Gosh ... you're so sweet Brother ... Oh My Gosh !!! :blush: :blush: :blush:

Can a colored girl blush ... oh my gosh ... :blush:

I got a big ol' kool aid smile on my face right now ... :D

Oh My Gosh ... is all I can think to say ... :luvv:

whispering ... do you need me to find out which flights are headed this way ... :wink:

Don't be play'n wit my emotions Brother Putney Swope ... :smash: ... :love:

:heart:

Destee

Oh My Gosh ... you're so sweet Brother ... Oh My Gosh !!! :blush: :blush: :blush:

Can a colored girl blush ... oh my gosh ... :blush:

I got a big ol' kool aid smile on my face right now ... :D

Oh My Gosh ... is all I can think to say ... :luvv:

whispering ... do you need me to find out which flights are headed this way ... :wink:

Don't be play'n wit my emotions Brother Putney Swope ... :smash: ... :love:

:heart:

Destee
please post on my notes I will be there in November as long as no strings attached

Brother Putney Swope ... wait ... before you rob that bank or catch that flight ...

You do realize once we do it, you can never leave me ... right?

We're together on that part? :love:

:heart:

Destee

please post on my notes I will be there in November as long as no strings attached

Oh wait ... see ... there are strings attached ... you'll be stuck with me for life.

Whatchootalknboutwillis ... no strings attached ?!!! ... Please.

Not only strings, but chains, locks, all that kinda stuff !!! ... :whip:

:heart:

Destee

please post on my notes I will be there in November as long as no strings attached
this is not a joke , I have seen your photos and I am a straight up Billy Dee NYC conceited N, and don't hit on anyone unless they are the best of fine and you got it going on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh wait ... see ... there are strings attached ... you'll be stuck with me for life.

Whatchootalknboutwillis ... no strings attached ?!!! ... Please.

Not only strings, but chains, locks, all that kinda stuff !!! ... :whip:

:heart:

Destee
I will have to wait until I purchase another house for us here in NYC

I love you but I will not relocate for no one

Brother Putney Swope ... wait ... before you rob that bank or catch that flight ...

You do realize once we do it, you can never leave me ... right?

We're together on that part? :love:

:heart:

Destee
I believe in all honesty, the way you look, after the one time,
all other women would become unatracctive to me

this is not a joke , I have seen your photos and I am a straight up Billy Dee NYC conceited N, and don't hit on anyone unless they are the best of fine and you got it going on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will have to wait until I purchase another house for us here in NYC

I love you but I will not relocate for no one

I believe in all honesty, the way you look, after the one time,
all other women would become unatracctive to me

Brother Putney Swope ... you're a SweetHeart ... but I'm gonna need signed contracts (in blood preferably) prior to the exchange of any bodily fluids.

That last sentence above ... won't play a part, because whether other women are attractive or not ... you'll never get to see 'em ... you'll be locked in the basement, chained, bolted in ... per the contract ... lol

I think we have true love in the making ... this is so beautiful ... :love:

:heart:

Destee

Brother Putney Swope ... you're a SweetHeart ... but I'm gonna need signed contracts (in blood preferably) prior to the exchange of any bodily fluids.

That last sentence above ... won't play a part, because whether other women are attractive or not ... you'll never get to see 'em ... you'll be locked in the basement, chained, bolted in ... per the contract ... lol

I think we have true love in the making ... this is so beautiful ... :love:

:heart:

Destee
The way you look, I will weld myself in, no chains please, we have had enough pain the past 400 years, and I am 3 hour man, expert in giving pleasure

brandishing dirty LCD switchblades?

dirty LCD switchblades? dirty LCD switchblades!

:10500: please explain

The way you look, I will weld myself in, no chains please, we have had enough pain the past 400 years, and I am 3 hour man, expert in giving pleasure

lol @ weld yourself in ... that is too sweet ... gosh Brother Putney Swope ... i think i'm in love ... break all the rules you want ... :luvv:

:heart:

Destee

lol @ weld yourself in ... that is too sweet ... gosh Brother Putney Swope ... i think i'm in love ... break all the rules you want ... :luvv:

:heart:

Destee
NO NO NO NO NO THIS IS PERSONAL NOT BUSINESS,

but as far as giving earth shaking mind boggling pleasure I am willing to break a record!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NO NO NO NO NO THIS IS PERSONAL NOT BUSINESS,

but as far as giving earth shaking mind boggling pleasure I am willing to break a record!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm not playing that photo of you with the dress makes my knees shake!

NO NO NO NO NO THIS IS PERSONAL NOT BUSINESS,

but as far as giving earth shaking mind boggling pleasure I am willing to break a record!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm not playing that photo of you with the dress makes my knees shake!

:love:

:heart:

Destee

:love:

:heart:

Destee

in NYC is the derth of African centered sisters, and i? haveread your posts responses and the purose and dedication you have,
the only thing I have that is harder then my dedication to the Black community is.... well...:luvu::hearts1::hearts1::hearts1::hot::cook ::hearts3::hearts3::hearts3::bowdown::hearthis::he arts2::hearts2::insane::kiss2::kiss2::luvv::dance3 ::dance3::massage::massage::band::cook::cook::wine ::wine:

the derth of African centered sisters in NYC

i live in philly and i have scored african centered sisters from NYC. more than once.
african centered?, heck, you can get african born.
open your eyes.

dirty LCD switchblades? dirty LCD switchblades!

:10500: please explain

My uncle gave me a LCD switchblade when I was a little girl. He taught me how to use it to stab someone so that the wound would never heal right and he told me to keep it dirty so they get a bad infection. For self protection purposes of course.....

Really? Aren't you afraid of false advertising and all the crazies out there? What happens if you get all attached to someone and they aren't what they said they are or walks around brandishing dirty LCD switchblades?
Peace,

That ain't ever happen to me even though it could. I ain't sleeping though. Even though you carry the dirty LCD (did you even know it was an LCD till I pointed it out to you?) you ain't never fell victim to false advertising. :qqb015:


My uncle gave me a LCD switchblade when I was a little girl. He taught me how to use it to stab someone so that the wound would never heal right and he told me to keep it dirty so they get a bad infection. For self protection purposes of course.....
So if another woman steps to your man and you pull the dirty knife could that really be considered "self protection?"

Peace

Peace,

That ain't ever happen to me even though it could. I ain't sleeping though. Even though you carry the dirty LCD (did you even know it was an LCD till I pointed it out to you?) you ain't never fell victim to false advertising. :qqb015:



So if another woman steps to your man and you pull the dirty knife could that really be considered "self protection?"

Peace


Yes I did. Because at one time I was looking for a battery to replace it. I'd like to know what time it is so I can tell the police. AND If I gotta pull it out, that means I feel threatened. Ya digg?

in NYC is the derth of African centered sisters, and i? haveread your posts responses and the purose and dedication you have,
the only thing I have that is harder then my dedication to the Black community is.... well...:luvu::hearts1::hearts1::hearts1::hot::cook ::hearts3::hearts3::hearts3::bowdown::hearthis::he arts2::hearts2::insane::kiss2::kiss2::luvv::dance3 ::dance3::massage::massage::band::cook::cook::wine ::wine:hahahahahahhhahahahaha....you two get a room.

My uncle gave me a LCD switchblade when I was a little girl. He taught me how to use it to stab someone so that the wound would never heal right and he told me to keep it dirty so they get a bad infection. For self protection purposes of course.....
rubbing some garlic on it is better , if you can hide the smell

rubbing some garlic on it is better , if you can hide the smell

I'll add that to the dirt. Thank you for the suggestion!

I had sexual contact (giving and recieving oral sex) with someone I met online. It was a horrible experience and not because I dislike oral sex but because, well.., I won't get into it.