I'm just wondering why there isn't more discussion on this board. i know there are quite a few regular visitors, destee family here.

i'm always open and seek other people opinion, knowledge, experiences. so often i'm wondering why there are only a few, maybe 5 peole who discuss other topics besides poetry. no offense to poetry, of course.

but even with the tradegy of two weeks ago, i thought there would be more discussion happening here.

is it that we are afraid to disagree? or are yall afraid of kemetry? LOL!

but other than Kemetry, Amun, Shaneak, Destee, Cocoabutterskyn, Epiphany and a few others, i don't see many other people contributing. i have invited several people here because i like the vibe. but couldn't there be a little more life away from the poetry board?

anybody listening

i have visited the chatroom a few times during the day. why are't these people participting in this forum. the names i see there are not the names of the people who frequently post on this board.

i asked the chatroom members all several occasion why they don't post here. I never really get an answer, but i do get asked if i work for destee. :)

I do agree though.. I guess some aren't interested.. and plus some aren't that computer literate and only go with what they know. So they don't explore and look further into the site like some of us do. Also... they may not be interested in our topics of discussion... :x: Just wanted you to know that I was listening... :x:

Too Thandie.......don't be discouraged. I just came to this site, through the invite of my sister (cocobutterskyn). I enjoy discussions, especially if I can learn from them or get informative opinions. It took me a minute to find my way here, but I spend, sometimes a hour or two just reading. Usually the post I answer to, are ones that I can relate to, ones I think I can add an opinon on and if I have a question I might wonder about I will add a new thread. If I don't post its usually that I find it more rewarding if I just read.....but thats just me. One thing tho is, I would like to applaud you and Shaneak for supporting my post and others, and having the courage to voice your opinion.

Epiphany :heart:

Thanks for coming ladies! So Epiphany, that's how you discovered destee.com. I'm glad to have to chance to converse with you all. As you know, Cocoa and I know how to handle Kemetstry. LOL! ;)

It think alot of time, people don't post because many times, you have to defend your position instead of people valuing the another opinion or experience you share. I'm not talking about here necessarily, but i have seen it on other sites.

And what do you mean people don't like our topic.?! :) I know there are concerns in our community that has to affect us all. Either us personally, a relative, and someone we know.

I just know there is more we can talk and share here.

So let's keep the discussion going!!!

Peace and love!

Hi Thandiwe, Shaneak and Epiphany!!!

What a great topic, thanks Thandiwe. (I would have posted it myself but folk would start asking if I work for Destee ... hehehe).

Of course we've all heard the saying "if you build it, they will come" and for the most part, God has blessed in that regard. People do come, but how do we get them to participate more after arriving? I'd love to know the answer to this question. I think in general, some folk are slower to get involved, reveal their thoughts to virtual strangers, perhaps even afraid that they will be judged based on a few words posted to a discussion forum. For those, all we can do is continue as we have, welcoming all views and opinions. As each one continues to visit and read, they will see the genuine affection we have for all who participate here.

Thank goodness we have the Thandiwe's, Shaneak's and Epiphany's of the world!! Oh yeah, and the Kemetstry's too ... hehehe. For it is you all and many others I've not named (WisdomSeed, Nexis, Dnommo, Coco, Amun-Ra, MotherEarth, EZBRO, etc.) that contribute to and keep the discussions lively.

As you noted Thandiwe, chatters are chatters and discussion forum folk are discussion forum folk. Some enjoy one venue over the other and therefore participate where they're comfortable. I think too that poets are poets. We have so many poets contributing in those forums and for the most part, that's where they stay. Of course there are those that cross the line if you will, choosing to take part in all things.

One thing that surprises me regarding the participation here, is that there are not more web site owners promoting their sites in that forum. The same goes for small business owners in our community. With so many folk meeting here from all around the country (and world), it seems a perfect opportunity to put their services and business in front of us, yet it's usually very quiet over there.

I think too that, if we consider both quality and quantity, we can consider ourselves blessed. We could have a forum that has a lot of participation, foolish posts, nothing substantive or we could have a few posts with dialogue meant to inform, uplift, encourage and teach.

I must admit, I'm not able to participate as much as I'd like. I don't get a chance to respond to the posts like I did at the beginning, when there was just a couple of us. I used to respond to every post (including all poetry), now I am doing good to welcome the new folk that join us.

Am I rambling? :)

Thank you all for being a part of this forum, making contributions like you do. A special thanks to you Thandiwe for all the folk you've invited to join us. Epiphany, I didn't know that Coco told you about us! <smiling at Coco>.

If you have suggestions (contests, prizes, anything) on how to make it better, get more folk to share their wealth of wisdom with us, I'd love to hear.

Again, thanks yall!

Destee

ps ... Thandiwe I would have PAID MONEY to be in on the chat between you and Kemetstry. I remember reading a reference to it on one of the posts and thought ... danggggg ... I missed that???!!!!!! It's nice to see someone, anyone, able to go word for word with Kemetstry, toe to toe ... and beat him :lol: (I read you won that bout ...right ... hehehe). More than one of his threads has made me bow out early ... whew ... :) ... my hat's off to ya Sis!

I am one of those who often looked but did not participate....then the other day I came in and posted a reply to the relationship thread stated by Kem...you gotta admit, doin battle with him is like throwin yourself into the fire...lol...but I came out of it relatively unscathed...I started replying also because I realise at the end of the day what we say is just an opinion and not personal and at the end of the day any differences stay here on the board...but I also find that giving your opinion and receiving replies to it, not only broadens your outlook on a subject but if challenged, urges you to find out more about it...so I for one, hope I can participate more in the discussions started from now on....

K

Thandiwe.. I think this was a very important topic for many reason. Not only was an opportunity for you have someone to talk to and have them listen to you...lol....but it give those who may read it the opportunity to step in to discussion forum. It's like an open invitation. Using my experience, I was a little shy to get involved in a discussion, even to reply to poetry postings when I first arrived. It's the warm invitation I received like you have presented here, that helped in my participating. I'm sure more will follow. Like you I've told many about this site. I was so impressed when I viewed the kinship here and the willingness to inform and involve new comers. I don't want to give the empression that everything here is honky-dory, I've observed some disagreements and misunderstandings, which are apart of life, but for the most part Destee is a mature and respectful community.
I love the way you continued to come and encourage members to get more involved in discussions and I'm sure your pleasant approach will have them participating in no time. Sometimes bullheadness works also, Kemetstry has proven that. :D

Epiphany....I'm glad to see you're enjoying yourself here. I had no doubt you wouldn't.....It's nice having my sister around. Love you:love:

Shaneak....I love the way you throw yourself right in the thick of things. The way you offer your opinion and your willingness to receive others. You speak a lot of your age, but we all were that age at onetime and I feel you are doing just fine. Wisdom comes with experience and knowledge and you seem to have no problem receiving them. Keep doing what you do. :heart:

Destee..... I think you are great! I've been to many poetry/discussion sites and yours is the most maturest I've seen. There is such a wonderful vibe here. The word family is used a lot at difference sites, but it is not only used here it is felt here. That's what I love so much here. If we could take Destee's and spread it all over the world.....it would be a better place. The way you handle the unruly visitors or even family member with respect is empressive. Dealing with people with respect and good tact is the key to keeping the peace and you've cornered the market on both. Much Love:heart:

Kitana....You are a wonderful and refreshing addition to the family. I've read your poetry, replies to them and replies to discussions, they are flowing with wisdom....Oh! I love your name:)

Well, I guess I've beat the keyboard enough this morning. I better get to work...traffic gets to be a mess after 6a....Have a nice day ladies.:)

Madd Sistahly Love:heart:
CCBSKYN

See........you have more company, bust out the cheese and crackers.....lol. I love your sense of humor. Yes, I have watched your confrontation skills
and you do very well handling yourself. I have first hand experience with Co co's opinions, many times I have had to cover her mouth and pull her from the
fray of an emotionally charged conversation...lol., but I admire that about her. I think you confused Shaneak's remark about people not liking the topics, with being mine. I agree, that we as African Americans have a lot to discuss about what is happening in our communities. I touch on a lot of those subjects in my poetry. I believe that a lot of our problems come as a direct result of not communicating
and not being knowledgeable about our history and
passing that information to each other and to our children. So they can be proud of where they came from and know what it took to get here. That is one of the things I love so much about being African American is our accomplishments, our talent, courage
and the strength we have even now to rise above the negative and I am in complete awe of what our ancestors endured, you can't help but bow in respect.
I don't feel a lot of our children are feelin that, especially the young black men. I am also glad we had a chance to converse and I'm sure we will come together in many other threads with an opinion
that will uplift and nourish the mind......


Destee, I also appreciate your voice and the opportunity to share our talents and discover a little more about enpowering ourselves. I can see you work hard to bring a site that inspires talent, dignity, and a togetherness that is the perfect representation of what an African American family should be about.....much props to you. I have been blessed being a part of it.
Coco, mentioned it several times, it had been a while since I had written any poetry, so she insisted and always spoke highly of the inspiration she had coming here, so I decided to come and I have been writing poetry every since.......lol.


Let's keep it going, Thandie, Shaneak, Kitana and Destee, Coco..............


Epiphany:heart:

peace and love destee (nice to know i was missed), shaneak, epiphany, kitana, kemetstry and er'body else just reading. ;)

i didn't mean to leave yall hangin'! :)

i changed isp and not having the best of luck with the change.

it's nice to see all those who showed up! and kemetstry, ain't nobody afraid of you. i bet you're really a sweetheart, despite all that macho talk! you need strong ladies like us to keep you interested!

i forgot to acknowledge nexis in my shoutout. he is always ready for a conversation!

now let me say this, i'm really a simple person. i love to talk, talk schit, laugh (even at myself) and meet new people.

so let's get this party started! let's get it started quickly!!!

~~~~~~~~~

so tell me what are your interests? what do you do when you ain't on destee?!

I spend time trying to submit my thoughts and I click submit and it goes to the login screen and I am already logged the **** in.

:jumping:

:waving:

Thandiwe,

I was trying to post a response to let you know that I do lurk around here quite a bit. I have tried a couple of times to post some well thought out responses to Mister Man himself only to get hosed in the process, then I have no recourse for recovery.

Enough whining. Suffice it to say that there is enough of us here to generate discussion.

Hey Destee, I'm in,I'm in! I've been locked out of destee for a while now. It seems i still can't post at home so here i am posting from work.

I missed you all, even you Kemetstry! :p ;) and it's nice to see the newbies!

I feel your frustration. As you can see, i haven't been here for awhile either. I think AOL is out to get me since i cancelled their services months ago. :D

and Kemet, please ain't nobody afraid of you. Like i said, i bet you're a big ol teddybear!

don't make me have you report to the chatroom again for another verbal beatdown.

Let me check around and see what you've been up to.

ya'll be at kem who's bark is bigger den his bite
but my brutha come strong so ladies do watch ya self
as we continue to grow u will see more & more places
and all kinds of forums on destee just so many hang
in da poetry forum.......
:D

:wave: Haaaaaaaay Thandiwe :wave:

Yes Yes Yes ! I'm sure Kemetstry is missing you Sis! He's run most
of the other ladies away from the open forum ... there are a few
of us die-hard Sista's still whoop'n on him ... but I think I heard
him say that no one whoops him quite like Thandiwe :D

:wave: Welcome Home Gurlie :wave:

Destee

I was just saying to a dear, dear sista/friend the other day, that I will be broadening my scope of interest to the various forums available to us here at Destee.

And I have begun to read, and will be responding more regularly because as you've said (and said it well), there IZ life beyond the poetry board. :lol:

(and I ain't a bit skurr'd a Kemmy)

a

Thandiwe...
nice to see ya..


Epiphany :heart:

you're hilarious Kemmy Kem! :)

dem ladyQueenz bout to whoop ya man
i'll be flying low watching ya back
coz i know ya gonna get in da mix wit a few
they don't be running from u so look out!:eek:

(i'm on yo side):D

it looks like there's quite a line-up of strong, confident women on the board..none of which admit to being afraid of Kemetstry...

methinks Kem better keep his running shoes ready...could need 'em at any time soon...

Rich..you want to be careful watchin Kems back...cause it looks like you're gonna have to fly real low, quite often...

I can hear Kem pounding his chest from here..all this female attention...hmmmm...:D

Jane's in the jungle again...

K

kitana u know best sistah but kem can stand his own
i'll just watch from up high ........hey Kem man da ladies
got us cornered what ya gonna do!?:lol:

now that's what i'm talking about!!!

as yall know i had a short force hiatus from the board!

things have picked up! I don't remember seeing much of Kitana and Nia before. and they are speaking it! Destee, Alyce, Coco, continuting the tell it!

Even got the fellas standing up. Even got Rich all up in the mix! Watching you , Jh'hiad. ;)

Now that's what i'm talkin bout! Stimulate and challenge the minds!

KEM MY ICON of INTELLECTUAL VIRTUE:x: Wht U B doin "slummin" in the gutter:confused:
U B role model 4 us ingrates who b lookin up to YOU while we walloew off in the bakein soda:eek: Don't lower your exquisite standards to be down here wit my happy arse:D You could't hang bro;) The shyte be thick all around da white port:toast: :kiss:

TOPHAT MAN U R SOM'EM ELSE BUT DA RICH ONE FEEL YA HERE

your truth is not the truth for everyone...

that is one of the problems we have here. we seem not to understand that life is relative. so your equation 2+2 equaling 6 because usually a couple other factors you fail to realize.

thought the things you say are truth, doesn't mean it has to continue. specifically, your feelings about a man's responsiblity when it come to children he leaves behind. or your feelings that the man no longer has responsibility when he gets his woman pregnant.

i have a son, he's too young now. i will teach him the important of protecting himself. which means, no sex or the importance of him wrapping it up and taking other measures as well. he will also know that if he does happen to impregnate a woman, no matter his relationship with the mother, his mainly responsible after that child is born, IS THAT CHILD. HIS CHILD. you seem to be able to squirk the part the men MUST play in this world.

How can we come together?

Kem, I really am interested in what you do away from the board. I am optimistic that you are more appreciative of black women.

you should know, divide we continue to fall....

females perpatratin as women? would that qualify for the
^^^$$$^&&&&&&$ B word? perpatratin an all?:D :toast: :cool:

incubaters perpetratin as women. they troll till they get inseminated. then they tell ya all about how your lifes gonna be.
with the so call law doggin ya. just lookin for that upgrade from
the welfare dept.. Oral gets the job done, plus its too much fun :) for both individuals :)

and what is a man?

especially one who considered a woman unworthy when he is "done" with her.

and Kem, it is good to know you do appreciate women.

Thandiwe... He isn't a man at all... He is now label by a woman as a dog... Based on the situation. Usually, i don't respond to these.. but thought I'd atleast share some articles i read by the current generation for journal based in DC. If you have not heard of it... urbanflavorz.com. Well anyways.. their was two articles I wanted to share.. one with 3 parts and another that is simply needed. I fear for out people and our country.. All that our ancestors once dreamed.. all that we worked so hard on unifying.. crumbling... I hope you all enjoy...

Every Brotha and Sista For Himself
by Ms. Rona
msrona@urbanflavorz.com

My grandfather always told me to listen to a wise man…take from it
what I could…learn from it and run with it…. You never know when you
are going to run across a man who is considered wise. You never
really know whether what he is telling you is `wise' until you
realize that five hours later, that conversation is still on your
mind. Today, for me, that wise man walked into an area where me and
a girlfriend were having lunch. She and I were laughing and talking
about the possibility of playing "Whitney Houston's role" and
becoming a `pastor's wife.' The gentleman walked in while we were
going back and forth and as much as he tried not to listen, he
couldn't help it because together, she and I could make a sanctuary
of Nuns fall out laughing.

In the midst of our conversation, he chimed in and began talking with
us about church. He then asked the following question. "Why is it
that the young people, I mean those younger than I – 30 –40, don't
have any gumption when it comes to political stances or standing up
for what you all feel is right?" "There is no political backbone
with your generation – no causes that you all choose to fight for.
Why is that?" My response – "Because in our generation, it's every
man for himself." I continued, "It's sad to say it, but that is the
way it is." I further explained to him that we (my generation),
don't have our priorities straight. We feel that if it is an issue
that is not affecting us directly, why deal with it. We live from
day to day; from paycheck to paycheck; season to season. If whatever
goes on in the world does not jeopardize our livelihood, then why
should we worry about it. He nodded his head, both in an
understanding manner, but also with a look on his face that
read "that is so sad." He talked about how when he was growing up,
everyone looked out for one another. They had to fight for so much
(the right to drink out of the same water fountain; the right to
vote; the right not to have to ride in the back of the bus; the right
to just live) and how we seem to take all of that for granted. He
said that it hurts him to think about how we can kill one another and
not form some type of alliance to stop the killing and really be
sincere about the cause – not just trying to gain our fifteen minutes
of fame. He talked about how sad it is to see how we treat one
another, talk about one another, call each other names and disrespect
one another as we do. He talked about how careless we seem to be
with our money and how we don't strive to save and build a future for
our children and our children's children. This same sentiment was
spoken by my girlfriend, who referenced the bible and how the Bible
says that we are to work and prosper – not for our children, but for
our grandchildren. She referenced Dr. Frances Cross Welsing, the
author of the "The Isis Papers –The Keys to Colors" (which is the
book for this month for my fellow UF Fam to read).

The conversation became so deep that we lost track of time. I walked
away from there – well ran, because I wanted to get all of this down
on paper and try to fit it into my life.

It is every man for himself in my generation. It is so evident in
everything that we do…and most of you know what I am talking about,
and I really don't need to get into that right now, because I've
written commentaries on it and we all understand what I am saying.

Nevertheless, I am still marinating on my conversation and am about
to counsel myself and hold myself responsible for what I have done –
and reflect on the image that I have created for my daughters to
follow. It's like my Pastor said in church one Sunday…."…the
headlines scream that we are in a recession, but it's one thing about
us black folk – we don't FEEL a recession because we are always use
to living this way- WE ARE SURVIVORS IN EVERY SENSE OF THE WORD – so
we can't relate to when the Dow is down or the markets crash because
we don't live in that world. We still go out and spend like our
dollar hasn't lost it's value because it is what we are use too."

Food for thought: I remember when I was in high school and we use to
beat up the white kids who would take our seats in the back of the
bus. Now, think about Rosa Parks being arrested because she DIDN'T
WANT TO SIT IN THE BACK OF THE BUS – but my generation FOUGHT –
physically – to sit in the back…. Rosa changed history….my
generation took it back and walked all over it.

I challenge my UF Fam to take the time to follow these 18 steps that
I have excerpted from "The Isis Papers: Keys to the Colors. Try and
implement them in your daily life – only those that apply to you.
Post them around…pass them on…do with them what you will, but for
each one that applies to you, be cognizant in it and let's try to set
a tone for ourselves, our children and our children's children. We
have to start somewhere. Why not with ourselves.

STOP name-calling one another.
STOP gossiping about one another.
STOP squabbling with one another.
STOP snitching on one another – informing on one another for reasons
of personal gain.
STOP cursing one another.
STOP being discourteous to one another.
STOP being disrespectful to one another.
STOP stealing from one another.
STOP robbing one another.
STOP fighting one another.
STOP killing one another.
STOP making dirt and filth the norm.
STOP using and selling drugs to one another.
STOP believing that "welfare" will save you – start believing in
prosperity.
STOP pretending that racism does not exist.
STOP being divided and conquered

msrona@urbanflavorz.com
__________________________________________________ ____________________




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M A N A R C H I V E

Female Gender Report Part 1
http://www.urbanflavorz.com/yman_gender01.htm

Female Gender Report Part 2
http://www.urbanflavorz.com/yman_gender02.htm

Female Gender Report Part 3
http://www.urbanflavorz.com/yman_gender03.htm

tophat:... at some point time we all perpetrate.. a way of hiding our true self-identity. These days we as people try to live as the american dream was made out to be. Often times.. many of us take different roads just to be partially listed in that dream...

A woman who flips the terminology of a bad fowl mouthing word consistently used against her into something positive to keep her own self-esteem up and you question it as perpetrating.. So i take the the fact that we as many blacks have at some point and time who converted the word ****** into ***** and made it something positive to keep their own self-esteem based on such a derogatory word used on their ancestors for years... is PERPETRATING Your history tells the stories of your peoples actions. Everything I see has been a trend.. from a beginning to end.. I can see the repetition.. can you?... 360 Degrees.... We just go round and round...