Black People | African Americans | Online Community





Black Chat - Black Poetry - Black Discussions - Destee





Black People | Black Chat | Black Poetry | Destee

View Full Version : Critique : Love


selecta
05-05-2005, 04:06 PM
U fall in it, like a 8ft hole
U fall out like skydiver but no parachute
It makes u smile
It makes u frown
Never wanting it to leave
Always wanting more

More, More, More

So Forgiving, and there is faith
So unconditional, trust is a must
Most importantly it is real and true
Most importantly humble and pure

It is hurt so badly when your heart is broken

You feel so alone
Nothing makes sense
Fear to trust mess
U don’t even have a clue
Ur first maybe a crush
Or it may crush you

A fresh picked red rose on a spring day

Beautiful, ready, growing, opening
Sun up, Sun down
So bright with delight
Precious moonlight or candle light nights

How do you who is the right one?

On a familiar ride
Who knows when it will end?
A Joy ride, so many turns
On Journey to find that one
Can u hang; it starts when you’re young

Can u weather the storm?

Days/ night of making love
Day/nights of u sleep on the couch
Wondering if u said the right lines
Through the good or bad times

Hope you have it until, your earthly end

Love is free, yet so priceless
But cost some much
Watch how u use
U can lose it
What has a beginning?
Must have an end

Nothing last forever

A wise person said
Nothing like it
Means so much
When in between 2 other words
I and YOU,

Dag, it is something about love.


copyright 2005 by aaron-selecta

1poetsought
05-07-2005, 01:37 AM
This too is awfully good. Always recheck your work for omissions and spelling, okay?

$$RICH$$
05-07-2005, 01:53 AM
very nice poem , i agree with bruth 1poet

AHMOSE
05-07-2005, 08:09 AM
When I write a piece I read it over several times to make sure that it has proper flow and that it properly conveighs what I wanted to say in each line.
Over all you did a good job..
Thanks for sharing...

Black People | Black | Black Chat | Black Poetry | Destee


Destee Copyright 2006 Black People