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View Full Version : Critique : 1 Confessions of the heart


MzBlkAngel
02-01-2005, 09:07 PM
Confessions of the heart
Secret thoughts of you
Inside my dreams
As my soul screams
The yearning
The touching
Of deep penetration
Baby send me in sensual
Mental stimulation
Cum-matic cerebral
Dramatic effects
Listening
Understanding
Defining
Searching
Reaching
With the wisdom
Confessions of the heart
As you caress my thoughts
Hold my mind
I can feel you invade
S-l-o-w-l-y

Up and down
As you roam my being
Moans cover the air mass
As you feed my mental
Sex-u-ally….
The touch you have
The power builds each time
Slow motion twist
Light bliss
As the starz blaze
I touch myself
In aching a massive turn on
Causing a divine delight
Feed my soul
the moon shines
Take my mind
the starz beam
Hold my spirit
the sun smiles
Knowing I am the one
You want and wish for
As you mentally tease me
And enhance my woman-hood
Heaven pours of
Passion essence
As we intertwine
And lace through
The night till morning
Notion hit motion set
An emotion rises
Turn me baby
Hour after hour
Down to the flo
Against the wall
Take me in and
Exhale
Inhale

Groove to the smooth jazz
Of our love
Don’t need no wine
You’re my divine pleasure
Taking every measure
Biting my lips
As you hold my hips
I release
Mentally you touch me
Working me in
Compassionate gentle
Ecstasy…..
As the fire burns
Confessions of the heart
Doing it to me slow
Then deep
Deeper
Harder
Loving your mental
Stimulation
A soul mix of a maze
Confessions of the heart
Sensual conversation
Mental orgasm
My baby gives me
Again and again….

(c) 2004
Passion files
Fire Production

queentswana
02-01-2005, 10:09 PM
Awesome piece, I wouldn't change anything in this one. But in the title, is the first word ... 1 (one) or I (i )?
the body of the poem was tight.

MzBlkAngel
02-02-2005, 12:14 PM
Thank you QT for taking the time out and reading and replying. I am happy you enjoyed it as it is. and the 1 is a (one) the thread would not take sense it was already an older poem it wouldnt take i guess so i stuck the 1 in ...lol

Peace
Angel

queentswana
02-02-2005, 01:25 PM
Thank you QT for taking the time out and reading and replying. I am happy you enjoyed it as it is. and the 1 is a (one) the thread would not take sense it was already an older poem it wouldnt take i guess so i stuck the 1 in ...lol

Peace
Angel


I luv that avatar ...it's real fly. ...^5

Khasm13
02-03-2005, 04:16 PM
thanks for dropin another one mba...this poem was truly steamy...goodness gracious...you gave the reader multiple images of sexual tension being realeased in some shape, form or fashion...1poet told me that rhyme'n is cool but to vibe is paramount...and vibe on this u definately did...good job...i had one question on this line....

I can feel you invade

my question is...if this is a mutal experience...why would you use the word invade...is it to suggest the other person taking charge of the situation?...i dunno...get back with me about that...

one love
khasm

MzBlkAngel
02-04-2005, 12:55 AM
thanks for dropin another one mba...this poem was truly steamy...goodness gracious...you gave the reader multiple images of sexual tension being realeased in some shape, form or fashion...1poet told me that rhyme'n is cool but to vibe is paramount...and vibe on this u definately did...good job...i had one question on this line....

I can feel you invade

my question is...if this is a mutal experience...why would you use the word invade...is it to suggest the other person taking charge of the situation?...i dunno...get back with me about that...

one love
khasm

Thank you Khasm glad you likes...and you felt just what i was trying to bring.

Hmmm you know khasm your right it was not the best word to use it wasnt a force but more of a submission. I gone have to pick me a word out thanks for pointing that out....
Peace
Angel

Lloyd
02-07-2005, 11:21 AM
For sure if i were ur boyfriend...-smile-.It's a great piece,an original one and as a boy i really like when girls are opened this way

$$RICH$$
09-15-2005, 08:49 PM
let me put the P in perfection
the whole structure was steamy and well pose'd
no need to do one thing here this poem send the
reader into a fantasy ride , very nice :congrats: sista Angel.

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