Why do Black People feel the need to apologize for the actions of other Black People? Whether if be that "brother" who got caught on camera stealing...the "sister" who was fired for falsifying records...or the family man who feels obligated to apologize for all black men who don't take care of their children...why do Black people apologize for things they don't personally do?

Great question!

I think most people apologize for the wrongful actions of others because they can relate to it to some degree. They understand what the person on the receiving end most be going through and look for words to comfort them.

Thats just one explanation, but I'm sure there are others.

Very thought provoking thread Panafrica,

I don't think that I feel the need to apologize for other black folks, but I do admit to feeling a sense of shame when other black folk do wrong to white people...for example, a beloved (white) shop owner known to many in the community for his kindness and charitable contributions and his wife were killed (gunned down) during a robbery by a young black man. When folks (white ) talked about it around town I felt as if I wanted to hide under a rock... as though the brutha's crime was a reflection upon the entire diaspora...and mostly me !!! And although I'm sure that extenuating circumstances likely led to his making this desperately wrong choice in life...everything from the legacy of slavery to perhaps growing up without a strong and decent black male role model in his life (actually another legacy of slavery)....I do not know that for a FACT... so I can't apologize for nor condone his actions.

However, when I hear about black folk doing wrong to each other... I feel it more personally ... I feel a deep sense of loss, despair and grief...like : Why are we hurting one another ??? I try to make sense of it by wondering to my self and asking others what could have made them "snap". Would that be the same as apologizing or condoning ??? I know I should feel more than embarrased when black folks victimize whites. I have no idea why I don't ... must be some deep seated rage :cuss:... or sumthin'...go figure

Much Peace,
Akilah :spinstar:

I think sometime we look upon it as if our culture has been labled to be destructive
and when our people cross the line into the stage where we already labled it shame
the whole as Blacks so some may step up to apologist in respect of what happen
but my self i can't account for bruthas who don't take care there family & children
they don't shame me nor hurt me but i feel for the broken home and children
i really don't know why we do this but we do .

akilah.. let go of my thought strings. :D lol

I don't think that I feel the need to apologize for other black folks, but I do admit to feeling a sense of shame when other black folk do wrong to white people...for example, a beloved (white) shop owner known to many in the community for his kindness and charitable contributions and his wife were killed (gunned down) during a robbery by a young black man. When folks (white ) talked about it around town I felt as if I wanted to hide under a rock... as though the brutha's crime was a reflection upon the entire diaspora...and mostly me !!!

There is no excuse for that young man. He will burn in hecktor when he dies. Maybe he is burning now. Internally. A man dies a thousand deaths and he doesn't have to lay down.

The folks of the gun clubs and NRA should get some of the blame for blocking better ways of monitoring the control of weapons. Getting ballistics, or serializing the bullets with a laser. The government made all these weapons, ans sold them to poor folks, thru the network of men. Evil men.

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http://community-2.webtv.net/PAULNUBIAEMPIRE/WHYMANYBELIEVETHERE

We know that the developed nations are using biological warfare, leaving guns to the primitive people, they have the resources to do this."
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And to us. Bringing in drugs and taking no responsibility but to collect the cartel money. Paying in the sixty for vacsetomys free for blacks to help the population of us ( genocide again ) , and unwanted abandoned children from being born and I also blame those who creating the welfare system. Built the projects, and jails to raise state funds and revenue. Testing radiation on poor children by radiating the milk, putting the radiation in tootpaste and testing LSD and sphyllis on blacks from 1932 to 1975 just to witness and collect the data and keeping the cure secret and away from these men. Test results were needed. :puke:

But the answer to the comment Akilah is. That young man like many criminals for money , for land, and all other crime. Commit crime against easy targets, trusting targets because upon entering the door. No one expect them to be down for a wrong. Befriend the Indians and then kill them. I have a blood line in my family that is Native american. I love them too.

Bless all who are killed and gone. In streets . In Wars. In tragedy, and crime. By abortion,. Thru unexpected and unbelieveable means. Those food poisoned and drugged by love ones everyone. Everyone.

Panafrica[FONT=Arial]

Why do Black People feel the need to apologize for the actions of other Black People? Whether if be that "brother" who got caught on camera stealing...the "sister" who was fired for falsifying records...or the family man who feels obligated to apologize for all black men who don't take care of their children...why do Black people apologize for things they don't personally do?


This is a good question you brought up.....

I often times catch myself doing this also, especially when it comes to negative and degenerate music coming across on the radio and I'm in the presence of non-blacks.

It's almost automatic for me to tell them that this is NOT "black music" but trash that white executives are pumping into our community with which we have little control over.

While some of it has to do with low self esteem, I think it's because so many of us are fed up with stereotypes about us and have actually seen so much negativity comming from our people that we feel the strong urge to "counter" it in some way either in behavior or words so that other people won't get the wrong impression.

Many of us are tired of seeing the same negativity among our people ourselves and feel we have an obligation to atleast let other people know that all of us aren't negative.

Panafrica[FONT=Arial]
This is a good question you brought up.....
I often times catch myself doing this also, especially when it comes to negative and degenerate music coming across on the radio and I'm in the presence of non-blacks.It's almost automatic for me to tell them that this is NOT "black music" but trash that white executives are pumping into our community with which we have little control over.While some of it has to do with low self esteem, I think it's because so many of us are fed up with stereotypes about us and have actually seen so much negativity comming from our people that we feel the strong urge to "counter" it in some way either in behavior or words so that other people won't get the wrong impression.Many of us are tired of seeing the same negativity among our people ourselves and feel we have an obligation to atleast let other people know that all of us aren't negative.

Good insight! If no one esle has done so, welcome to Destee.com.

I never felt the need to apologize for what other blacks do, but I do get upset every time I see a black person's face plastered on the news for a heinous crime. My first response is, "Why did they have to be black?!"

PanAfrica

Thanx for the welcome bro....

I barely apologize for the wrongs I commit... why would I bother apologizing for what some complete stranger did? Ridicule 'em, yes. Apologize for 'em, no.

I barely apologize for the wrongs I commit... why would I bother apologizing for what some complete stranger did? Ridicule 'em, yes. Apologize for 'em, no.

LOL @ Atman, well said! I used to apologize for men that do not take care of their kids, but I have since ceased. I stopped because of two things: (1) I was not one of the men doing this, as I don't have any kids out of wedlock (the children that I do have I provide for). Indeed my children live with me, and are a part of my life daily. Therefore I realized that it was illogical to apologize for a negative situation that I was not contributing to. (2) After years of observation, I realized that the choices many women made in men directly contributed to their situation as much as irresponsible men did. Ultimately I realized that all I could do was provide for my own family. People owe it to themselves to create & raise children in an environment that is best for them!

I dont make no excuses for them when you wrong you wrong. Admit you made a mistake correct it and move on. Shake your self loose forget all them excuses we all have them and they all stank like do-do.

back to the top!

For me, it depends on what the action of the other is and the situation, but for the most part, I apologize for the actions of people beacuse as you know, we are being judged and stereotyped everyday even by each other. I do it so the next person won't look at me and be like " she's just like the rest of them!", and what I mean are those who actually live the stereotype. And as with the stereotype itself, I think it's more about "proving" the fact that your black, like all this ignorant stuff is really who we are! Makes me angry.... if I had a dollar for everytime somebody said I wasn't black beacuse I didn't fit the black female stereotype, the homeless would be the wealthiest group of people in the nation! It's a shame how ignorant some people can be when they choose to.

PanAfrica

Why do Black People feel the need to apologize for the actions of other Black People? Whether if be that "brother" who got caught on camera stealing...the "sister" who was fired for falsifying records...or the family man who feels obligated to apologize for all black men who don't take care of their children...why do Black people apologize for things they don't personally do?
I don't consider myself an apologist, but I do get the "guilt by association" feeling sometimes.
Especially if I'm in a public place and those d*mn day shows like Maury Povich or Jerry Springer comes on showing Black people acting a fool and talking funny.

I can't help it, it's just a natural reaction that me and some other Black people have....especially other Muslims I know.


I know a lot of Black people who don't care and say "it ain't me so I ain't worried". They don't care what other races of people or even other Black people think of them.
I can't do that, I have a team mentality and see us in competition with other peoples. So if we have too many bad players on the team, we're losing, and people keep laughing at us....it irritates me.


It's not just some of us, most white men also seem to have the same "team" feeling and hate like hell for Black and other people to see the losers, bums, and slackers of thier race.

Got to most large cities and while most of the Black mentally ill are right in the middle of downtown begging among all the white businessmen and executives in suits and breifcases....while most of the WHITE mentally ill are tucked away in an institution and out of site where nobody can see them.

Now check it.....

If you were from China or India and came to Americas large cities and saw that most of the bums on the street were Black and crazy....what would be your first impression of Black people?

Most of them understand the Public Relations game and always come out smelling good because they know how to play.
Most of us don't and end up looking like perputrators when we're really the victim most of the time.

Look at New Orleans and how we were demonized.