Do you think casual sex is good way to go if you have needs but don't want the headache of being in a relationship. Do you think this could cause more bad than good? Obviously there are more people than ever having sex outside of marriage, but what are your views on it. What is the reason for it? Someone may have been hurt in a relationship, and now all they are looking for is someone physically to give them what they need, and that's all. Do you think there is anything wrong with this view?

yes i do from my aspect of it .....
casual sex is the second hand way of a cheap thrill
an act out of hurt or from lust

I will be back to express why i say this later..........

I, myself, have never had sex so I couldn't bring myself to understand the depth of "needs". So in my tunnel visioned opinion I think it's unsafe.

I used to talk to a guy though who had a casual sex relationship with a girl he didn't know from a can of paint. He tried to defend it but in my opinion there are too many risks. You might think that it's safe and hold no ties but you can never really know who else that person is casually having sex with.

However, in a real relationship you can have sex with them and know, or at least trust them enough to know that they only have sex with you and you only.

My advice would be to try your best to wait for a good relationship with someone you can trust. There are too many diseases and way too many risks involved, all for the sake of having your "needs" met. It can't be worth your health and/or more importantly your life.

What are the dangers of so-called casual sex? Ask Kobe Bryant that question Brother KenteMojo!!

Casual sex is fine in theory; however, the reality is there is really no such thing as casual sex. Sex is a physical & mental act. If you don't know the person that you're sleeping with very well, then you don't know how they'll react afterwards. It is almost impossible to have sex without 1 of the people having feelings for the other (irregardless of what movies & TV say). Also if you don't know a person very well, the possibilities of getting an STD increases, as you don't know their habits. Quite simply casual sex is very risky behavior.

Do you think casual sex is good way to go if you have needs but don't want the headache of being in a relationship. Do you think this could cause more bad than good? Obviously there are more people than ever having sex outside of marriage, but what are your views on it. What is the reason for it? Someone may have been hurt in a relationship, and now all they are looking for is someone physically to give them what they need, and that's all. Do you think there is anything wrong with this view?

I don't think casual sex is a good way to go @ all. Sex of any nature before marriage(altho I myself,in my past was guilty of it) is bad. Our bodies are temples. We should use our bodies to honor God with. Who says there are no headaches in casual relationships...panafrica made some good points ....I'd like to add Magic Johnson to that list of lQQk @'s. I've been hurt bad in relationships. I'm going thru a divorce right now after being with my husband over 10 years. My marriage ended over some simple, senseless stuff, and no one could ever truly know how painful this is for me. I would not let that push me into "casual" relationships despite the hurt. I'm not tying to be better than anyone else because I struggle too. Just wanted to share my view in hope to help someone else.
Nita

Hmmm...personally, I don't think that married people should be the only people to enjoy sexual relationships. Why should they be the only ones to enjoy something so beautiful?

As a biological reproductive function, a fertile egg must be merged with a capable sperm, although these days it doesn't have to occur as a result of a physical sex act.

How is "casual" being defined in this thread?

If I thought of relationships outside of sex as a "headache", I think that I would work on changing my views about that BEFORE I allowed anyone to touch or enter my body sexually. Sounds emotionally painful otherwise, even if it was physically gratifying. To me, that's just as risky as the potential of being exposed to an STD. For me, my head, heart and body have to be in synch for things to balance right (written like a true Libran).

Sex can occur between two people who are committed to each other and don't have sex with anyone else, although they may not be legally married or even 'boyfriend/girlfriend' per se. Isn't that "safe" sexual behavior?

If single people act responsibly, taking necessary precautions to avoid unplanned pregnancies and transmitting diseases, is it okay then for them to engage in sexual activity?

When people tell you like Sister Nita did, that your body is a "temple", what exactly does that mean and how does or should a person behave if you believe that?

Although I understand Brother Pan's point, I don't think that what Kobe and Magic did was necessarily a lesson to be learned about casual sex rather than how you should handle it, among other things such as honoring marital vows. They are poster children for ultimate stupidity in my opinion. I know....minor technicalities! :rolleyes:

Queenie :spinstar: :)

In my opinion, casual sex is not a bad thing. I mean, I know that most people think that sex is for marriage and reproduction only, but like NNQueen said, shouldn't single people be able to enjoy sex as well, as long as they are careful. There are people that have been married and don't want to go through the drama a second time around, but they choose to have sex with someone that they may or may not be with. I don't believe that they should have to go without just because they don't want to bind themselves with another "contract". There are people that care about eachother, but arent' married. I don't think that it's a good idea if you are running around having sex with everyone you meet without using protection, but I believe that intimacy shared between two people is a beautiful thing, not only in marriage.

That's true that many define casual sex differently. I guess my definition of it is two people who aren't married or in a relationship having sex. Or even if they are dating but not married, and still having sex.

:lol:you gone have major problems.You think that you can just have sex with a person and go on about your bizz?It doesn't work that way you have to have at least some kind of attraction to a person to sleep with them.That's my view.

:lol:you gone have major problems.You think that you can just have sex with a person and go on about your bizz?It doesn't work that way you have to have at least some kind of attraction to a person to sleep with them.That's my view.

Pardon the pun but, different strokes for different folks! What works for you may not work for someone else. How you are affected by a situation may be different for another person. And no, you don't always have to have some kind of attraction to a person to sleep with them. All that's necessary in the most basic sense of the concept is the other person has something that you want. Sexual activity can either be given without condition, bartered for or taken. Attraction is not always the compelling reason though.

Peace,
Queenie :spinstar:

If you are asking yourself the question, then you must have a hang up about it. It all depends on your moral values, and what you are whiling to accept. The risks are there, they are present in everything we do in life, so that’s not going to be the deciding factor when it comes to casual sex. The deciding factor is whether or not you’ll be able to look at yourself in the mirror the next morning, and not have a problem with the person who’s staring back at you. How the world sees the situation should not matter, because the world will not have to live with that decision, you will. You should also keep in mind that condoms do burst, people do lie, AIDS does kill, and he/she may have a criminal record.

Greetings and welcome Luver2B....this is the second post I've read by you and I like your logic and common sense approach to topics. Thank you for sharing your opinions and welcome to our community. I hope you continue to participate and enjoy your time with us.

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Peace,
Queenie :spinstar:

I guess when I think of the term Casual Sex my mind does not automatically take me to the bed of a stranger. So I would KNOW if he was a killer, rapist, molester or if he had hiv/aids ect...it would not be a random act.

I know myself that I get HIV tested 3 times a years...regardless of if I've had sex or not...even when I know I've used protection each time.

If I were going to have casual sex it would be with a good friend or someone I've known a long time. I guess I'm at an age where we've been able to satisfy those needs for one another without getting caught up in drama, emotional attachments or misunderstandings. Casual sex does not mean that you don't communicate. Casual sex does not mean that it was spur of the moment. Casual sex does not mean you can't ask someone to have an HIV test. I think Casual Sex just means sex outside of a committed relationship.

Random sex with a stranger is usually referred to as one night stands.

But that is just my humble opinion.

If you are asking yourself the question, then you must have a hang up about it. It all depends on your moral values, and what you are whiling to accept. The risks are there, they are present in everything we do in life, so that’s not going to be the deciding factor when it comes to casual sex. The deciding factor is whether or not you’ll be able to look at yourself in the mirror the next morning, and not have a problem with the person who’s staring back at you. How the world sees the situation should not matter, because the world will not have to live with that decision, you will. You should also keep in mind that condoms do burst, people do lie, AIDS does kill, and he/she may have a criminal record.

I like how you said this. It was a well balance response to the questions posted by kente417mojo, to which I agree totally...we do have to be able to look at our self in the mirror the next morning. We can put up a good "so what" attitude before others, but the bottomline is...we know the real deal from the inside, even if we've managed to fool others with "words" that appear to be wise but are instead empty. If we can look in that mirror and be happy and feel good about what we did, then that decision has been made and all responsibility accepted. If we aren't happy with what we see in the mirror, then some perhaps a moral examination should be considered instead of thrown away.


Joyce

I don't know about the hang up part, but I do like to get others opinions. Seeing as I don't know everything. Either way, I think CarrieMonet made very valid points as to her definition of casual sex. Also Joyce hit it on the head. If you can't look at yourself in the mirror the next morning then you have to deal with that. Very good points, because if someone did have a close friend, someone they could trust, then would that be wrong to have a sexual relationship with them if both parties could handle it? Even though there is no marriage or relationship. They would be there for eachother to satify physical needs.

Casual sex is not a bad thing at all! I think that it's a choice that should be made by the two consenting adults. As long as they are honest with each other and protect themselves then what is the problem?

On a personal level casual sex does not work for me! All I came into this world was my word and my body. My word is my reason. My body is my temple. It may not mean a hill of beans to any one but me; nonetheless, it's mine and I must take care of it. When I invite people inside my temple I want him to know that he is special. That we are special. That very few men have ever been here; therefore, he should respect the gift that I have given to him. No one else can give him this gift. It has not been watered down and tainted by the masses. And it is pure in its own form... lol.. seriously though...

If U "I may not be the most precious woman; however, in my world i am the most exalted." Come Softly

Do you think casual sex is good way to go if you have needs but don't want the headache of being in a relationship. Do you think this could cause more bad than good? Obviously there are more people than ever having sex outside of marriage, but what are your views on it. What is the reason for it? Someone may have been hurt in a relationship, and now all they are looking for is someone physically to give them what they need, and that's all. Do you think there is anything wrong with this view?

Hell Yeah
The reason casual sex is a big factor
I think that you dont want to get tied into the same routine
Its like if I do the same job like delivering mail
The same route the same time everyday
Im going to want a chnage same concept
Have Fun Live A Little

Sex is by no means casual. Even one night stands are thought through before the act. This can be distructive if a person is constanly having so-called casual sex. It is not casual at all, it is sought out and deliberate which can lead to all kinds of issues. For instances, unwanted pregnancies, STD's, and stalkers. Which questions, is this an addiction or is this just to satisfy my lust without the work needed to sustain a committed relationship where love is primary factor in the equation making sex beneficial.