Father's Day 2003 will soon arrive. When you think of your father, what immediately comes to mind?

I'm sure many of us have fond memories of our fathers and some of us don't. Either way, has knowing or not knowing your father made some type of impact on your life?

Is there good reason today to celebrate African American fathers? After all, we often hear so much negative "stuff" about them through the media and even amongst ourselves. They've been called by many uncomplimentary names: "sperm donor", "absentee", "no good", "irresponsible", and the list goes on and on.

Everyone knows that not ALL men who become fathers fit those descriptions. Most men can father a child, but being fertile doesn't make him a parent. Aaaahhh, fathers as parents. How good are they at parenting their children? Sometimes, I don't think we appreciate them until they're gone from us.

A year ago my father died. My favorite name for him was "Pop"! I always called him that. I never realized how close we were until he was gone. We used to chat a lot and about so much. He was a gentle man, but firm at the same time. You didn't want to cross him. My boyfriends discovered that much to their shock and horror! :eek:

I used to get really upset when Pop would watch over me like a hawk. I couldn't get away with much of anything. *lol* He was extremely protective of me and I didn't understand then why that was. Years later after I had my own child, I discovered the answer. I miss that about my dad. It was always comforting knowing he was there for me no matter what.

I'm glad to have known him; proud to have had him as my Pop, and I'm extremely thankful that I got the opportunity to tell him that and I loved him before he passed away.

Let's pay tribute to the fathers that deserve it...and here's to you Pop! :toast:

Peace :love:

http://www.gendercenter.org/aafathersprotect.htm

There is no community in the world where the father is not an important role in the family. I was blessed to have a father in my life (my parents have been married for 34 years), and his influence played a large part in the type of man I am today. My father is not that much of a talker (never has been). But he was/is a good provider that led by example. He believed in hard work, obeying the law, paying the bills on time, and loving his family. His example is reflected in myself and my brothers.

As many of my Destee family knows, I work with High School kids (I have also worked with elementary school kids). Without meaning to stereotype, I can almost tell which kids have a positive male figure at home by their behavior. It is extremely rare for kids with a stable two-parent household to cause trouble. In the rare instances where they do, a simple call to their parents (preferable the father) will straighten them out. Whereas a call to a fatherless house is often a hit or miss situation.

This fathers day will be a special one for me. I am going to visit my parents (they live in a different state), so I will celebrate it with my dad. But what really will make this father's day special for me is that it is MY 1st father's day. I look forward to years of receiving ties, shirts, and other gifts that I don't really like........lol!

LOL@Pan ((((Hugs))) Happy Father's Day! :heart: :)

The one word that comes to my mind when I think of my father is Dad. That was the only thing that I called him, because that was what he was....my dad.

Reading panafrica's tribute to his father was like reading a tribute I would write about mind...I lost m y father 15 years ago, but I still thank him everyday for being my dad. People tell me that I look like my father, but I'm anxiously waiting for the day that people will say "you are like your father".

Panafrica...there's nothing like fatherhood...enjoy it and take full advantage of it rewards.

((((hugs)))) ZG!!!! Thank you for paying tribute to your "Dad." I'm sure he would be extremely proud of his son!!! :heart: :)

My father is a amn who toke over another mans job, who cared for me and was there for me because he wanted to. My dad is my moms husband.

I believe that in order to be honored for Fathers Day you have to be there as a father.

My children fathers will not recieve anything from MY kids. I raise them, take care of them and my dad has become there male role model. He'll be recieving the gifts we give daily.

Azzura76, it sounds as though you're proving that it takes more to being a "dad" than just making a baby. You're blessed to have a father like you do. I hope you and your children enjoy honoring him this Father's Day. Thank you for paying tribute.

Peace :heart:

Continuing in our celebration of Black Fathers....The deadline has past for this project at the University of Maryland-Eastern Shore, but what a wonderful idea! It would be nice to see what was submitted and eventually published.

http://www.umes.edu/blackfathers/

:heart:

This website might be helpful to those Black men that either already are or want to become a great dad. Let's continue our celebration of Black Fathers!! There are some great ones out there and some that will be!!!

http://www.parentlineplus.org.uk/data/parents/blackdads.htm

:heart:

Have you ever wondered why it's so important for Fathers to be present and positive in the lives of their children? Here's some information that you might find helpful.

http://www.imdiversity.com/villages/african/Article_Detail.asp?Article_ID=48

It's good reading!

:heart:

There's nothing that warms my heart more than seeing a Black man showing love to Black children...

http://www.imdiversity.com/Article_Detail.asp?Article_ID=562

:love:

Fathers are waiting to be honored. . . here's your chance to pay tribute to Black men!

So often we're confronted with a barrage of negative publicity. Some Black men claim that they get no respect from their women.

I'm sure there are more people that visit here that have something positive to contribute to this thread.

There's a saying: If you're not part of the solution, then you're part of the problem!

:heart:

when it comes to the word FATHER i know a few
my Father was a man a family man he took me as a child
by my hand he walked me through life along the way he mold
me to be a man .....I honor my Father wit the biggest grace
this man was a legend in his time he was the icon of my life
and i try very hard to continue his legacy he was a father to many
up and down the street his warmth was lovin , he was tenderly
and well respected a provider for his family had that moment of
time to listen and was always their O' how i miss this MAN a FATHER ..........to u DAD......now a FATHER my self i am of he whom
mold me to be what i am in his shoes i fit well yes father's are very important see i didn't just make a seed nor have children
but i've father children with the lost of my son I now Father his children my Grandbabies so it takes a real man a wisdom man
a lovin man a man who listen and share time and teach mold and
be to his children what man should be makes him a FATHER
i have to say i'm doing it wit pride from the teaching of my Dad
Black families been labled far too long and been push aside
Fathers are very important in a childs life as the mom is
let us give high honor to the men the Father's and now the best gift is having all my children beside me which will be not
but what was left is the second coming of my child R.I.P baby
forth i now hold da bond of your children i know what a father is
and the true role of a father ........may the blessing be upon the many Father's whom so foot the bill ..... and to the one's whom so
wall away and turn such back shame .......but FATHER's are a major factor in a child life.........

... or trying to break down sterotypes, or trying to prove something to society...we're about raising our families.

Queen this is in response to the link you provided to the webpage on Maryland's Eastern Shores project:
Black Fathers and Sons: Ordinary Men doing Extraordinary Things

http://www.umes.edu/blackfathers/

I've edited this reply a few times because I've reacted to it, in the course of my attempts to draft this reply, a number of ways.

Initially my first reaction was that it was somewhat of an insult, to suggest that those of us who are raising our children (not just sons) seek validation or recognition from society to confirm or reinforce that what we're doing is the right thing to do.

Then, I thought ... since when have raising a family become "extraordinary?", as the title of the page suggested.

And last the quote If you know of Black fathers/sons—who have made a significant impact on the lives of their families and or communities—and are willing to document such life histories, ... as if the numbers are so few that one would be hard to find, and that this "extraordinary" feat is worth documenting so the world would know and use it as a "how-to?".

I can't speak for anyone but myself...regardless of the sterotypes of black men, black fathers and the images society has placed on us, those things have never been an issue or even a thought in the raising of my children. I wasn't trying to break down those stereotypes or trying to gain the spotlight for doing something that was required of me by my children and family, nor did I seek or need validation...I went about my business of being "dad" to my children.

Perhaps I'm narrow-minded in my view and don't quite understand why such a book is necessary to "show" society by documenting something that some are calling "extraordinary" and I merely see as something I do on a daily basis. In some bizarre way, I think this project somewhat 'cheapens' fatherhood, although it has good intentions. If we need to "read" about fatherhood to gain a positive perspective of what it is, then we are worse off then I thought.

This diatribe, of course, is just mho :)

ZG!!!!!!!!! This diatribe as you referred to your post....is GREATLY appreciated!! I think that your view is not narrow-minded nor is it uncommon. The way you describe your relationship with your children is exactly how it should be. But it's not always like that ZG. To a mature-minded person who is grounded and well-adjusted, yes...but there are those among us who need this type of validation...prescription...."how to" guide, if you will.

Extraordinary things are most often done by ordinary people like you and me and many of us here. I don't see this project as something that takes away from fatherhood. I see it as a way to remind some of us that we are among the extraordinary, we are about taking care of business, it helps those who are struggling and confused, it keeps positive information in front of us because we hear, see, read so much negative about us, it helps those who feel weak and misunderstood and alone, to know that we do value their efforts and we want to crown you our kinds and lift you up and place you on the throne where you rightfully belong!

This diatribe, of course, is just mho :) :heart:

I also feel that there is nothing extra-ordinary about being a father. In raising my daughter, I am simply doing my job as both a father and husband (as my father, grandfather, and great-grandfather did before me). However, since there are a lot of black fathers who are not playing a significant role in their children's lives (there are complex reasons for this pattern, though that is a discussion for another time). There is a need to give the ones that do special attention. I thank people when they tell me I am a good father and rare man. Because I know they mean to compliment me; however, I don't do what I do for acknowledgement. I do it for love for my daughter, and my only reward is her smile.

yes sir likewise here as long as they are happy
i've done what a Father should do and that's to
love thou child ........

Panafrica,

Yes, there are complex reasons why some men are not involved in their children's lives. All of us must work to change those reasons, the fault does not always lie in the person alone.

I hope this thread and others like it will continue to uplift and celebrate the good that we know and see in us and about us.

Peace and :heart:

This is a great thread! Thanks to all the "true" black fathers.

This is a good thread right here.........I'm not a father, I had a father he and my mother left me in the hospital the day I was born never to be seen again after which I was adopted and got a Daddy and Mama. I am a Daddy I love my chillun more than life itself and have to give respect to all the Daddys that's doing what we gotta do to raise them liluns right and keep em smiling..I may be hard on em sometimes but it's always for the good and they love me for it well gotta take the kids outside to ride bikes later...I've never been a good man but I'll always be a good Daddy

Mississippi Red ....Sip from can to can't :smokin:

Father's Day 2003 will soon arrive. When you think of your father, what immediately comes to mind?

I'm sure many of us have fond memories of our fathers and some of us don't. Either way, has knowing or not knowing your father made some type of impact on your life?

Is there good reason today to celebrate African American fathers? After all, we often hear so much negative "stuff" about them through the media and even amongst ourselves. They've been called by many uncomplimentary names: "sperm donor", "absentee", "no good", "irresponsible", and the list goes on and on.

Everyone knows that not ALL men who become fathers fit those descriptions. Most men can father a child, but being fertile doesn't make him a parent. Aaaahhh, fathers as parents. How good are they at parenting their children? Sometimes, I don't think we appreciate them until they're gone from us.

A year ago my father died. My favorite name for him was "Pop"! I always called him that. I never realized how close we were until he was gone. We used to chat a lot and about so much. He was a gentle man, but firm at the same time. You didn't want to cross him. My boyfriends discovered that much to their shock and horror! :eek:

I used to get really upset when Pop would watch over me like a hawk. I couldn't get away with much of anything. *lol* He was extremely protective of me and I didn't understand then why that was. Years later after I had my own child, I discovered the answer. I miss that about my dad. It was always comforting knowing he was there for me no matter what.

I'm glad to have known him; proud to have had him as my Pop, and I'm extremely thankful that I got the opportunity to tell him that and I loved him before he passed away.

Let's pay tribute to the fathers that deserve it...and here's to you Pop! :toast:

Peace :love:

http://www.gendercenter.org/aafathersprotect.htm

When I think about my Dad the first thing that comes to mind is how much I miss him. How I miss the Wisdom that he shared with me and the example of a hard, tireless Worker that was who taught me the value of taking the hard road instead of the "easy way out". My parents divorced before I could remember and the earliest memory of my Dad was in court when he was fighting my mother for custodial rights. He was a part of my life from my earliest memories. He taught me the importance of education, of academics before athletics and work before play. He also taught me to have the utmost respect for women, especially within my own family. My Dad passed 15 years ago at the age of 55. I still miss him dearly.

The one word that comes to my mind when I think of my father is Dad. That was the only thing that I called him, because that was what he was....my dad.

Reading panafrica's tribute to his father was like reading a tribute I would write about mind...I lost my father 15 years ago, but I still thank him everyday for being my dad. People tell me that I look like my father, but I'm anxiously waiting for the day that people will say "you are like your father".

Panafrica...there's nothing like fatherhood...enjoy it and take full advantage of it rewards.

This testimony/devotional about your Dad is one of the most beautiful things I've ever heard!


Thank you for sharing it.....It warmed my heart!