Amun-Ra
11-26-2002, 09:19 AM
I could be kicked out of the playas club for what I am about to write about but I feel that it is necessary. As a man I’ve found it difficult to explain to women the difference between being sexy and sexual and I am dumbfounded to find a reason why I even should care.
Nevertheless, the difference between the two is not written anywhere, but the reality of the two and how it affects relations is all around. Unfortunately, I think there is a clear misunderstanding of the two among women and that misunderstanding contributes to hurt feelings, unwanted advances and confusion about men.
I would describe sexy as an overall person that has a sexual element that is nearly hidden behind mystery as well as good taste and restraint, whereas sexual removes any mystery or restraint and provides sexual interest rather than overall interest. As a man, why I should even care remains a mystery.
Does it make a difference? It depends upon a woman’s goals. Either appearance will interest almost any man, but it is the type of interest that determines the relationship and seems to be confusing to women. For most men, the more skin available to a man’s eye, the more his thoughts move toward sexual activity. After that the distinction is just a matter of how much work is going to be necessary to achieve the goal—sexual intercourse.
This is not to say that a solid relationship cannot develop, it is just saying that sexual intercourse was the primary motivating factor. It was a purely physical attraction.
On the other hand sexy usually produces a more restrained approach because the sexual signals are not so clear. Obviously, there is a sexual interest but without that clear sexual signal, men tend to approach women a little more cautiously, and usually end up taking time to form a more meaningful relationship.
It appears that many women don’t care about the difference, but when complaints go out about the type of men they attract, that’s when I have a problem. Of course, if a romp in the hay is all you are seeking, the sexual look is much more effective in getting right to the point.
I am taking a risk in writing this because I could be kicked out of the men’s club for revealing such information but it just seems that women should know what they are getting into from a man’s stand point rather than by what their girlfriends tell them.
On a purely testosterone driven level, I find that sexual women attract me. I like that blatant sexual appearance, that slightly tawdry and nasty aura that makes my blood race, but I must also confess that until AIDS these would all be one-night stands unless it was real good and even then I wouldn’t have given out my real name.
On the other hand a sexy women is intriguing not for what she shows but for what she doesn’t show. It is the mystery that is the ultimate attraction, but even it has its drawbacks, as testosterone doesn’t like to spend much time working.
In addition, these women can be marriage risks and may take us out of circulation. Still, it’s not my call. Women wear what you like, but be aware the signal you think you’re sending may not be the signal that is received. When there is chum in the water, it attracts sharks—and we all bite.
Nevertheless, the difference between the two is not written anywhere, but the reality of the two and how it affects relations is all around. Unfortunately, I think there is a clear misunderstanding of the two among women and that misunderstanding contributes to hurt feelings, unwanted advances and confusion about men.
I would describe sexy as an overall person that has a sexual element that is nearly hidden behind mystery as well as good taste and restraint, whereas sexual removes any mystery or restraint and provides sexual interest rather than overall interest. As a man, why I should even care remains a mystery.
Does it make a difference? It depends upon a woman’s goals. Either appearance will interest almost any man, but it is the type of interest that determines the relationship and seems to be confusing to women. For most men, the more skin available to a man’s eye, the more his thoughts move toward sexual activity. After that the distinction is just a matter of how much work is going to be necessary to achieve the goal—sexual intercourse.
This is not to say that a solid relationship cannot develop, it is just saying that sexual intercourse was the primary motivating factor. It was a purely physical attraction.
On the other hand sexy usually produces a more restrained approach because the sexual signals are not so clear. Obviously, there is a sexual interest but without that clear sexual signal, men tend to approach women a little more cautiously, and usually end up taking time to form a more meaningful relationship.
It appears that many women don’t care about the difference, but when complaints go out about the type of men they attract, that’s when I have a problem. Of course, if a romp in the hay is all you are seeking, the sexual look is much more effective in getting right to the point.
I am taking a risk in writing this because I could be kicked out of the men’s club for revealing such information but it just seems that women should know what they are getting into from a man’s stand point rather than by what their girlfriends tell them.
On a purely testosterone driven level, I find that sexual women attract me. I like that blatant sexual appearance, that slightly tawdry and nasty aura that makes my blood race, but I must also confess that until AIDS these would all be one-night stands unless it was real good and even then I wouldn’t have given out my real name.
On the other hand a sexy women is intriguing not for what she shows but for what she doesn’t show. It is the mystery that is the ultimate attraction, but even it has its drawbacks, as testosterone doesn’t like to spend much time working.
In addition, these women can be marriage risks and may take us out of circulation. Still, it’s not my call. Women wear what you like, but be aware the signal you think you’re sending may not be the signal that is received. When there is chum in the water, it attracts sharks—and we all bite.