Alkebulan
09-16-2002, 01:52 PM
the massachusetts bar association lawyers journal reported the following r 22 ? s actually asked of witnesses by attorneys during trials &, n certain cases, the responses given by insightful witnesses:
1. "now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies n his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?"
2. "the youngest son, the 20-yr old, how old is he?"
3. "were u present when ur picture was taken?"
4. "were u alone or by urself?"
5. "was it u or ur younger brother who was killed n the war?"
6. "did he kill u?"
7. "how far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?"
8. "u were there until the time u left, is that true?"
9. "how many times have u committed suicide?"
10. Q: "so the date of conception (of the baby) was august 8th?" A: "yes."
Q: "and what were u doing at that time?"
11. Q: "she had 3 children, right?" A: "Yes."
Q: "how many were boys?" A: "None."
Q: "were there any girls?"
12. Q: "u say the stairs went down to the basement?" A: "Yes."
Q: "and these stairs, did they go up also?"
13. Q: "mr. slatery, u went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn't u?" A: "i went 2 europe, sir."
Q: "& u took ur new wife?"
14. Q: "how was ur 1st marriage terminated?" A: "by death."
Q: "& by who's death was it terminated?"
15. Q: "can u describe the individual?" A: "he was about medium height & had a beard."
Q: "was this a male, or a female?"
16. Q: "is ur appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which i sent to ur attorney?" A: "no, this is how i dress when i go to work."
17. Q: "doctor, how many autopsies have u performed on dead people?"
A: "all my autopsies r performed on dead people."
18. Q: "all ur responses must b oral, ok? what school did u go to?" A: "oral."
19. Q: "do u recall the time that u examined the body?" A: "the autopsy started around 8:30 p.m."
Q: "and mr. dennington was dead at the time?"
A: "no, he was sitting on the table wondering y i was doing an autopsy."
20. Q: "u were not shot n the fracas?"
A: "no, i was shot midway b/t the fracas & the navel."
21. Q: "r u qualified to give a urine sample?" A: "i have been since early childhood."
22. Q: "doctor, b4 u performed the autopsy, did u check 4 a pulse?" A: "no."
Q: "did u check 4 blood pressure?" A: "no."
Q: "did u check 4 breathing?" A: "no."
Q: "so, then it is possible that the patient was alive when u began the autopsy?" A: "no."
Q: "how can u b so sure, doctor?" A: "b/c his brain was sitting on my desk n a jar."
Q: "but could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
A: "it is possible that he could have been alive & practicing law somewhere."
1. "now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies n his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?"
2. "the youngest son, the 20-yr old, how old is he?"
3. "were u present when ur picture was taken?"
4. "were u alone or by urself?"
5. "was it u or ur younger brother who was killed n the war?"
6. "did he kill u?"
7. "how far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?"
8. "u were there until the time u left, is that true?"
9. "how many times have u committed suicide?"
10. Q: "so the date of conception (of the baby) was august 8th?" A: "yes."
Q: "and what were u doing at that time?"
11. Q: "she had 3 children, right?" A: "Yes."
Q: "how many were boys?" A: "None."
Q: "were there any girls?"
12. Q: "u say the stairs went down to the basement?" A: "Yes."
Q: "and these stairs, did they go up also?"
13. Q: "mr. slatery, u went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn't u?" A: "i went 2 europe, sir."
Q: "& u took ur new wife?"
14. Q: "how was ur 1st marriage terminated?" A: "by death."
Q: "& by who's death was it terminated?"
15. Q: "can u describe the individual?" A: "he was about medium height & had a beard."
Q: "was this a male, or a female?"
16. Q: "is ur appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which i sent to ur attorney?" A: "no, this is how i dress when i go to work."
17. Q: "doctor, how many autopsies have u performed on dead people?"
A: "all my autopsies r performed on dead people."
18. Q: "all ur responses must b oral, ok? what school did u go to?" A: "oral."
19. Q: "do u recall the time that u examined the body?" A: "the autopsy started around 8:30 p.m."
Q: "and mr. dennington was dead at the time?"
A: "no, he was sitting on the table wondering y i was doing an autopsy."
20. Q: "u were not shot n the fracas?"
A: "no, i was shot midway b/t the fracas & the navel."
21. Q: "r u qualified to give a urine sample?" A: "i have been since early childhood."
22. Q: "doctor, b4 u performed the autopsy, did u check 4 a pulse?" A: "no."
Q: "did u check 4 blood pressure?" A: "no."
Q: "did u check 4 breathing?" A: "no."
Q: "so, then it is possible that the patient was alive when u began the autopsy?" A: "no."
Q: "how can u b so sure, doctor?" A: "b/c his brain was sitting on my desk n a jar."
Q: "but could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
A: "it is possible that he could have been alive & practicing law somewhere."